


Separate Lives

by lenfaz



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, F/M, Mild Language, alternative universe, non-explicit reference to violence and death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-30
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-03-09 18:20:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 39
Words: 65,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3259703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lenfaz/pseuds/lenfaz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set after 3x20 "Kansas". After saving the town one more time, Emma decided to return to New York, leaving her past behind. Three years later, she realizes that might be not have been the best decision.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

“Having your own business can be really fun, it gives you free time if you need it and…”

Emma Swan tuned out of the conversation completely. She did not understand why she even bothered to go out on dates anymore. It wasn’t like she was going to find True Love in a guy she was set up with by an acquaintance of her boss. She looked at her phone to see how much longer she could stay before calling it a night.

Fifteen minutes later, she invented an excuse and left the restaurant. She grabbed a cup of coffee and headed to the river, enjoying her walk.

She sighed deeply. It had been three years since they defeated the Wicked Witch and she decided to return to New York, magic and fairytales be damned. Storybrooke be damned. She had had enough of the curses, the danger, the drama. She wanted peace, a good environment for Henry. Sanity.

After they defeated the witch, it became clear that the new curse did not trap people in the town like the last one and everyone was able to cross the town line if they wanted to. Thanks to this, some folks decided to venture into the outside world. Regina moved to New York with Robin and Roland, determined to move forward and stay in Henry’s life. A little bit later, David and Mary Margaret settled in Queens, where Mary Margaret started teaching again and David rekindled his work in the animal shelter. Her parents had gone the extra mile to continue being in her and Henry’s lives, willing to accommodate to the modern world and she truly appreciated their gesture. It had allowed them to bond in a way she never felt was able to do in Storybrooke.

Her life was a good one now and everything made sense.

Everything but _him_.

She’d never see him again, not since their confrontation after they defeated the witch. After she gave up her magic to save him and told him she was moving back to New York.

_“You’re really going back to Ne_ w _York? Don’t you care about your parents or anyone else in this town?”_

_“I have to do what is best for Henry…”_

_“That is a lie. This is not about Henry. This is about you running away. Aren’t you tired of running? Don’t you want to at least try? Stay… please stay, Swan. Let us try for a happy future.”_

_“I’m sorry if I misled you, Killian. But I am going back to New York. I’m done with all this.”_

_“As you wish, love. I won’t bother you again. Goodbye, Swan.”_

She never saw him again. He’d vanished from existence. He left Storybrooke, that much she knew; but where he was or what he was doing was a mystery to her. Eventually, she pushed him out of her mind almost completely.

But on nights like this, as she felt the wind on her face nearby the river, her mind could not help to think of him, wondering what could have been if she’d not ran away. She closed her eyes and could almost conjure his image, feel his eyes staring deeply into hers.

She finished the coffee, tossed the cup into the garbage bin and headed home, wondering.


	2. The Chase

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos! I hope you like this chapter as well  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

_You're an accident waiting to happen_  
You're a piece of glass left there on the beach  
 **Who’s gonna ride your wild horses, U2**

_  
_She checked the time on her phone again. If the tip was correct, her mark would be leaving the diner any minute now and she’d be able to get him easily. The guy had not left New Jersey, which meant he was an asshole that was very sure of himself. Those were the easy prey, as they would lower their guard and did not see the blow coming.  Emma checked to see if she had her taser and her gun prepared and she got ready, her eyes focusing on the diner exit again.

She saw him leave, not even checking to see if he was followed. She smirked as she exited the car and moved towards him carefully. As she was close to him, she yelled.

“Barry Thomas! You’ve skipped bail…”

The guy took one look at her and started running. She sprinted quickly after him. He was fast, but she was good at this, her years as a sheriff and her experience as a bailbondsperson had made her very good at chasing the bad guys and figuring it out their turns.

She was getting close, really close, she was going to catch with him in no time… and then she felt someone crashing into her, with such force that it knocked her out into the ground.

It took her a moment to get her bearings, as the pain from the fall made her lost her breath. And in that precious time she saw how Barry Thomas escaped from her. She was furious. The idiot that clashed into her made her lose the guy she was after.  She turned around, rage in her voice.

“What the _fuck_ you think you were doing!?”

And then she froze at the man a few feet away from her on the floor. It could not be; it really could not be. Dark tousled hair, tall, slim, broad shoulders; but modern clothes.

It could not be.

And then he lifted his head and those intense blue eyes from her past were gazing at her, confusion and recognition in them…

“Swan?” He said breathless and it was his voice. His low, dark, raspy voice.

“Hook?!?” She replied in awe.


	3. The Cover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos! I hope you like this chapter as well. Some of the chapters will be very short, more scene-like, and some will be longer. It will depend on plot development  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

_I disappeared in you_  
 _You disappeared from me_  
 **So cruel, U2**

 

“Swan?” He said breathless and it was his voice. His low, dark, raspy voice.

“Hook?!?” She replied in awe.

“What the hell were you doing?!” He yelled at her.

“What am I doing? You ran into me!” She yelled back.

And it was all she could manage to say before she heard steps behind her.

“Police! Don’t move and put your hands up where we can see them!”

She did as she was told; lifting her hands in the air and showing she was being collaborative. She looked at Hook, who paid no attention to the police instructions.

“Hook, lift your hands! These guys have guns; they will shoot you if you don’t respond, they’ll think you are a threat.”

He ignored her as he slowly started to push up from the floor, with all the intention of getting up. He looked at her, there was surprise in his eyes but there was also something else she could not pinpoint.

She could hear the police approaching them, yelling at them, “Do not MOVE!”

She started to panic, Hook was not listening to them and they’d probably think he was armed _-was he armed?-_ and they’d shoot him.

“Hook, please _listen_ to me. These guys won’t hesitate, please, _please_ _don’t move_!” She pleaded, her eyes filling with tears.

He smirked at her.

The police surrounded them. “Get up slowly. Hands where we can see them.”

She slowly started to get up, her eyes never leaving Hook, who was sitting on the floor by now, an arm over the knee on his drawn leg, not caring about the situation. She feared for him again.

And then one of the officers spoke directly to him, “Are you OK, Detective?” The officer asked as he offered a hand to Hook.

“Aye.” Hook replied as he took the hand and stood up. “I’m fine, sergeant, thank you.”

Emma looked at him shocked. Detective? _Detective?!?!_

“ _Detective?!?!”_ She exclaimed surprised.

Hook lifted his head, smirking at her, standing proud and tall in that daring stance she knew so well.

“Detective Killian Jones, New Jersey State Police. At your service, milady.”


	4. The Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos! I hope you like this chapter as well.   
> Some of you have expressed that you wish to see more detailed descriptions... I think this is the time to let you know that English is not my native language, so everytime I try to do long, detailed descriptions, they come out awkward.   
> This chapter is longer than the others, I hope you enjoy!  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

_We crossed the line_  
Who pushed who over  
It doesn't matter to you  
It matters to me  
 **So cruel, U2**

_“Detective Killian Jones, New Jersey State Police. At your service, milady.”_

She stood there speechless, trying to process the information. He called her by her name, so it meant he _knew_ her. He had his memories. She looked at him one more time, her eyes going directly to his left arm, expecting to see the obvious. But the hook and the brace were gone, replaced by what it looked to be a state of the art prosthetic hand. She gasped in shock, her eyes scanning all over him, taking him in. Captain Hook in modern clothes was quite the sight: dark denim jeans, black shirt rolled up to his elbows, a brown leather shoulder holster carrying a gun on his left side. The shirt had a couple of buttons opened, showing the hint of a white t-shirt underneath. The necklace with his charms was still in place, but she noticed his rings were gone. His right hand was almost bare, featuring only a small silver engraved ring in his middle finger. And leather bracelets on his wrist.  She took it all in, what she always imagined finally confirmed: Killian Jones in modern clothes was as sexy and breathtaking as possible.

She finally found the courage to look at his face. It was the same as she remembered: incredible blue eyes, only a slight shadow of eyeliner below them; very subtle, almost imperceptible, but she could recognize it.  He had traded his flashy earring for something smaller, but it was still there. Somehow, the smug pirate still lived underneath the modern exterior. And the combination was taking her breath away, her heart beating faster and faster as it dawned on her that he was standing right in front of her.  

He smirked at her, eyebrows waggling, head tilting.

“Like what you see, princess?” He teased and she could have crumbled just from hearing that tone in his voice again.

She blushed and was about to reply with something sarcastic when one of the officers interrupted them.

“Thomas got away, Detective.”

“Bloody hell” Killian cursed and she could not help but smile at the familiarity until the words sank in.

“You are after Thomas?” She asked, “I’m after him.”

“That explains why he was running away instead of walking into the trap we had set up for him.” Killian said. “Well, thank you, Swan. You’ve just ruined my operation and months of police investigation.” He sounded pissed.

“Detective, we should get back to the station and debrief. And she should come to give her statement.” The officer said. “You’ll have to come to the station with us, Miss.”

“She comes with me, officer. I’ll take her.” Killian said quickly as he turned away and started walking. He stopped for a second, slowly turning around and giving her an intense glare, “Are you coming?”

She quickly caught up with him, “Are you going to tell me what it’s going on?!?”

“Let’s get to the car, Swan.” He replied as he turned around the corner and headed to some cars parked in the street.

Killian opened the passenger door of a brand new black mustang and motioned her to sit, before closing the door and heading to the driver’s seat. Emma was speechless again. A brand new mustang was not something within the range of a cop’s salary.

As soon as he sat and closed the door, she started asking questions, “What is all this about, Hook!?”

“Killian.” He said looking at the steering wheel.

“What?”

He took a deep breath and exhaled deeply, finally looking at her, “Killian. No one has called me Hook in almost three years, I’d like to keep it that way.” There was a hint of sadness in his voice, as if it pained him to hear his moniker.

“Fine, _Killian_. Can you explain what is all this? How come they think you are cop?”

“Because that is what I am, Emma. That is what I’ve been for the past three years. Detective Killian Jones, Homicide and Brutal Crimes Division. NJSP.” He sighed. “ _This is who I am now_.”

“How?”

“Like everybody else, Regina fabricated an identity for me.” He smiled sadly. “When I decided to leave Storybrooke, I asked her for guidance on how to navigate this world and she offered me this chance. She’d create a past for me, one that would help me get myself on track and start over. She infused me with a few memories that I know are fabricated, but they are close to the truth of my previous life so it’s not that hard to keep it all straight. She also gave me knowledge about this world and this profession. And she fabricated some credentials so I could get this job. A good chance to start over.”

He sighed, starting the car, “And now that _that_ is out of the way, we need to head to the station. I need to know everything you know about Thomas and how you got caught up in all this.”

“You can drive one-handed?” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them.

The look he gave her was enough to make her blush, “Swan, I might have been willing to endure your comments back then; but I’ve lived in this world now long enough to know that is not _good form_ to comment on a person’s disability like that. So please, I know it’s hard for you, but try not to insult me again, sweetheart.” There was repressed anger in his voice as he bit his upper lip.

“I’m sorry, H—Killian, I’m just shocked about this.” She apologized.

“Still not ok to comment on it. I’m as shocked as you are, Swan. I never thought I’d see you again.”

And just like that, the cat was out of the bag. He never expected to see her again. He lived in New Jersey, very close to where she was. He actually knew where she lived, as she moved back to the same apartment she had during that year she spent without her memories. But he never went to find her.

That realization tore her apart in a way she had not expected. It shattered her in a million pieces. She’d always thought he’d find her, that no matter how much she’d pushed him, he’d always come back. He always came back: he turned his ship around to take her to Neverland, he defied a curse and crossed realms to find her; so she kept pushing and pushing, because he’d always come back.

Until the day he didn’t anymore. And it wasn’t until now that she realized how much she regretted that he didn’t.

They remained silent the rest of the ride, as she observed how Killian drove with incredible dexterity considering his missing hand. He parked near the station and Emma exited the car. Killian was by her side in an instant, guiding her into the station, past the counter and into the back. At some point, almost by reflex, his hand was on her lower back and she felt a jolt of electricity pass through her body. She tried to hide it, but he caught on it and smirked, his eyebrows rising of their own accord. Before she could say anything, a tall brown haired guy approached them.

“Killian, what happened?”

“He got away, Mac. We had an unfortunate incident with a cross chase.” Killian sighed as he took Emma to one of the desks in the back and pulled a chair for her to sit in.

“And she is…” The other guy inquired interested.

“Swan, this is Detective Mac Sanders, my partner. Mac, this is Emma Swan. She was chasing Thomas when I crashed into her, sending our entire operation down the drain.” Killian said sighing, his hand going through his hair and making a mess of his hair.

Emma smiled at Mac and then her gaze focused on the desk. It was neatly ordered, all paperwork filed away. It put her desk back in the Storybrooke station to shame. Then she saw the little plaque in it.

“Lieutenant Jones?!?” She could not help but ask that question a little too loud.

Killian’s stare told her he did not appreciate the comment. “It is my rank, Swan.”

“For now. Killian here is up for a promotion with how well he’s been doing. I’m pretty sure once we close this case and put Thomas behind bars, he’ll finally become Captain.” Mac said proudly, his hand clasping Killian’s shoulder.

Killian smiled at his partner, almost sheepishly. He was leaning on another desk, right in front of her, arms crossed on his chest and Emma was having a hard time concentrating on anything that was not him. With the leather coat and vest out of the way, she could finally appreciate how slender Hook actually was. Tall and slim, she could admire the sharp lines of his shoulders and take in how strong his arms seemed, the fine hair that covered his forearms. She shook her head as Mac’s words sank in.

“You are about to become _Captain Jones_?” She could not help herself again but this time he smirked at her and held her gaze daringly.

“It seems so.”

“Not only that,” Mac kept bragging, “Killian will be the youngest detective to become Captain.”

Emma chuckled and Killian raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you ok there, Swan?” He asked pointedly.

“Wait a minute… you know each other?!?” Mac asked intrigued.

“Aye, yes. I know her from the time I spent in Maine.” Killian replied calmly. “Emma was the Sheriff of a town and our paths crossed a few times.”

“This is when you were working as a private investigator, right?” Mac looked at Killian.

“Exactly.”  

Emma looked at Killian and smirked. It seemed Regina covered most of the basics and Killian was quick on his feet to fill in the blanks. Of course he was. Once a pirate, always a pirate. He was looking at her intently now, as if he was defying her to break his cover. She only smiled and turned her attention back to Mac, who was asking another question.

“You’re still a Sheriff?”

“Oh no,” She replied. “I quit and moved to New York. I am a bailbonds person.”

“That’s why you were chasing Thomas.” Killian asked her.

“Yes, he skipped his meetings and we need to take him in to recover the bail.”

“You should perhaps stay out of this one.” Killian said

“What do you mean by that?”

“We’ve been chasing him for months, and we suspect he’s involved in several violent crimes. Let me handle this one…” Killian told her.

“I can’t do that.” She replied stubbornly, which only fueled Killian’s anger.

“He’s dangerous, Emma.” He continued, trying to control the anger in his voice.

“I can take care of myself, Hook.”

And that was the last straw for him. His eyes quickly scanned the room and saw only the three of them remained. He turned around and addressed Mac.

“Can you give us a moment, mate?” He asked.

“Sure, I was heading home anyway.” Mac sensed something was up but he let it slide for now. “Nice to meet you, Emma.” He said before leaving them alone.

Once Mac was out, Killian turned around so fast that Emma did not see him coming.

“ _Are you out of your mind_ , Swan?” He sneered at her, controlled rage in his voice. “This guy is dangerous, _fucking_ dangerous.”

“And I know how to defend myself!”

“This is not Storybrooke, lass, where a badge and a sword where enough to face a villain. There is nothing of the sort in here. We are talking guns, drugs, torture, beat ups, _possible rape_.” Killian almost chocked at the last part.  “I’m telling you to back off.”

“I will not.” She said stubbornly.

“I’m not _asking_ you, Swan. I’m a police officer; you are interfering with _my_ investigation. I’m giving you an order.”

Emma lost her temper as well, “You are going to pull rank on me, _detective_?You are aware that all this was created by Regina, right?”

She stood up and he invaded her private space instantly, like old times. It was almost intoxicating to be this close to him. “It might have been Regina’s creation at the beginning, Swan. But I’ve been doing this for years now, this is _my_ life. You don’t get to tell me if it’s right or wrong.”

“I don’t care if this is your life. This is my life too! My job! What I do! That doesn’t matter to you?”

Killian could see it in her eyes: the contained rage, the stubbornness, he remembered her reactions all too well. And they were unnerving him. She was getting under his skin again and he had to _do_ something. He had to make her listen to him. As shocked as he was about seeing her again and reliving all the hurt and the pain of her pushing him away; he could not put her life at risk.

But he knew that she was processing all her emotions about seeing him again and was not dealing with them well.

Emma was blinded by her emotions, “You listen to me, Hook, you are going to let me be part of this, you cannot push me away and act like I cannot handle this. I am more than capable of-“

And that was when she heard the click sound of the handcuff on her wrist. Before she could react, Killian had dragged her to the cell at the end of the room and cuffed her to the bars. He closed the door and looked at her daringly.

Emma could not believe what just happened.

“Killian, you can't do this to me... uncuff me NOW!”

“You left me chained on the top of that beanstalk for 10 hours. Now you are going to sit here and wait and cool off. I'll be back in a few hours.”

He grabbed his black leather jacket and headed for the door.

“HOOK!”

“Not my name, love.”

“Killian!”

He turned around, walked back and pressed his face on the bars, really close to hers.

“Payback is a bitch, princess. And you should know by now, I am nothing if not a man who seeks his revenge. See youlater, Swan.”

 And he left the room.


	5. Partners in Crime

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos! This chapter is shorter, but as you can see, I'm updating this fic frequently as it has taken over my life and I cannot do anything else until I finish it!  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

Killian stepped out of the station onto the sidewalk, fuming. Of all the stubborn, careless things Emma Swan had done in her life, this was by far the worst.

And of all the things he could have done during their discussion, the only thing he _wanted_ to do was push her over his desk and kiss her senseless until he couldn’t breathe anymore.

He sighed deeply and ran his hand through his hair.

“Everything ok, mate?”

He turned around to find Mac standing on the side, his back against the wall, smoking a cigarette.

“I thought you quit” Killian said.

“You quit. I just pretended that I did.” Mac replied smiling.

Killian smiled and got lost in his thoughts again.

“Killian, where’s the lovely miss Swan?” Mac asked

 “Oh, that. I locked her up in a cell. She was refusing to cooperate and throwing a fit. I chained her in the cell to give her time to cool off.”

Mac raised his eyebrows at him, taking a puff of his cigarette.

“And you think that is a good idea?”

“Not really…. But I can always say she was interfering with a police investigation” Mac looked pointedly at him. Killian looked defeated.

“She was driving me insane.” He admitted.

“And it was probably not the first time...” Mac finished his cigarette and looked at Killian “Is there more in here that you are not telling me, partner?”

Killian sighed, “I can handle it, Mac. It was just a shock seeing her again, that is all. I’m not going to leave her chained for a long time. I’ve already asked Mel to call her family and I’m just going to get us something to eat and bring it back here.” He finished.

“She was more than just a Sheriff you crossed paths with, wasn’t she?” Mac asked, not really fooled by Killian’s tale.

“Aye.” Killian admitted

“Who was she to you, Killian?” Mac asked. In the years he knew Killian, he’d never seen him like this.

_The love of my life._  Killian thought.

“It’s old history, Mac. Nothing that matters now. This won’t interfere with my work, I promise”. Killian said before turning around and headed to the street.


	6. Family Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's probably time to go back and see how Emma is doing, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos!!  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

Emma was livid. _Livid_. Hook’s nerve to leave _her_ chained in a cell. _Again_! She was going to get tell him all she thought about his pretty _perfect_ new life as soon as he got back. She tried testing the handcuffs, but she knew it was pointless. She contemplated screaming to get some of the officers’ attention, but something in her mind prevented her from doing so.

It had been less than an hour when he came back, carrying two Styrofoam cups and a brown bag. His black leather jacket suited him perfectly, reminding her a little of his old leather coat. She smiled sadly and sighed deeply. She had been able to calm down a little while he was out, leaving her exhausted and pensive.

He put the bag and the cups in his desk and went to the cell. He silently uncuffed her and opened the door of the cell.

“I brought you something to eat.” He said and he pulled the chair for her to sit. He grabbed one of the cups and a package from the bag and went to rest on the side of the desk opposite of her. He stood there, watching her, waiting for her to make the first move.

“You have to let me go, Killian.” She said. “I have to go back to Henry. You cannot keep me locked in here.”

“I wasn’t planning to, Swan. I’ve already asked one of the officers to call your parents. They’ll be here shortly, I presume.” He replied and he took a sip from his cup.

She searched the brown bag curiously: he had brought her a grilled cheese sandwich and a bear claw. She took a sip from the cup: hot cocoa with cinnamon.

_Of course he’d remember_.

The remains of her anger vanished from her, replaced by an intense sadness. She looked at him and he was looking at her, pain and longing in his eyes. It was a look she knew very well, she had seen it in him several times; but there was always something more in there. In between the pain and the longing, there was always hope. Not anymore. There was no more hope in his eyes, not when it came to her.

She sighed deeply, “Where do we go from here, Killian?”

“I don’t know, Swan. I don’t expect you to agree with my choices, or even understand them. But this is my life now. And it’s real for me.” He looked at her, a small plea in his eyes. “I might have been a fabricated farce in the beginning, but I’ve worked very hard to change that, to make it real. And I like it. It’s a pretty good life. I have a job that I like, a-“

“A woman that you love?” She interrupted him and he looked at her confused. Then he realized that he’d been repeating the same lines to her that she said to him when he went to find her in New York, years ago.

“Sadly, no,” He replied. “There’s no woman that I love in this life…”

“Perhaps there’s a woman that you love in the life that lost…” She ventured before being able to stop herself. _What was she doing?_

“What are you playing at, Swan?” He asked defensively. “If this is an attempt to lure me into letting you be part of this investigation, it’s a low blow. Even for you. And I haven’t lost any life… I remember all.” He sighed deeply. “There was just nothing left for me in that life anymore.” He scratched the back of his head.

“Killian, I’m sorry. I-”  She struggled to find her words.

He waved his hand dismissively, “Don’t fret over this, love. Regardless, I cannot let you in this investigation. It’s too dangerous.”

She looked like she was about to protest and he knew he had to keep talking before it escalated. “Swan, I know you are more than capable, I know you can take care of yourself, lass. I’ve seen it many times. But we are dealing with a fucked-up maniac in here. I wasn’t exaggerating earlier about the possible charges: we are talking sexual abuse and major violence. I cannot let you anywhere near this.”

He looked at her and she could see honesty and raw fear in his eyes. He swallowed and continued, “Even if it ruined years of investigation, I’m glad I ran into you today. If I hadn’t and you have gotten to him, I don’t know what would have happened to you.”

His voice broke and all of the sudden, he was taken to another time, another place, another life. Cora’s hand in her chest, trying to rip her heart out. Lost Boys attacking her. Pan trying to kill her. Zelena sending the Dark One after them. All the times he feared for her life. And none of them compared to the mental image of Emma Swan lying lifeless on an alley, raped and beaten up to death.

His eyes searched hers, and she could see them welling up with tears.

“Please stay out this, Swan.” He pleaded.

_I can’t lose you. Even if I don’t have you, even if you’d pushed me away and broke my heart, I can’t bear the thought of something happening to you._

Emma was rooted to the spot, unable to talk, move. He was looking at her with such familiar intensity, it was hard not to recall every single time he’d pleaded with her and she’d run away, breaking his heart.

Before she was able to reply, his cell phone started ringing. He looked at the screen.

“I have to take this, give me a minute.” He said as he stepped into the nearby office.

She sat there, trying to gather together her thoughts about all this; but she couldn’t come up with anything.

She heard footsteps on the door and turned around to see David and Mary Margaret approaching her with worrying faces.

“Emma! Are you ok?” Mary Margaret cried as she went to hug her.

“I’m fine.” Emma said.

“We got a call from the station, they said you were involved in a police situation and you had to come give a statement and then you got detained!” David said.

“I’m ok, it was just a small misunderstanding.” She lied. “I think it’s all sorted out now…” She smiled.

“What would they lock you for?” David asked, stressed over the situation.

Emma was about to answer David when his voice interrupted them.

“She was interfering with a police investigation. _My_ investigation.” Killian was standing at the frame of the office door, looking smugly at them. “Detective Killian Jones, NJSP.”

David and Mary Margaret’s jaws dropped in astonishment and Emma thought that was probably how she looked when she first saw him.

“Hook?!?” David said.

_Like father, like daughter._

“Ok, I know you royals pretty much have like four sets of memories right now and it’s hard to keep up, but the name is _Killian Jones._ Detective Killian Jones.”

Mary Margaret looked at Emma for confirmation, “What is he talking about?”

Emma smiled, “Killian is a detective in the NJSP. Courtesy of Regina. He was chasing the same guy I was and we bumped into each other…”

“That is a lovely way to phrase it, Swan.” Killian retorted, “The truth here is that your daughter jeopardized and actually ruined a police operation that took us months to put together. Not to mention, she could have gotten hurt in that chase.”

“You are a _detective?!?_ ” David asked.

“Glad to see you are catching up, mate.” Killian snarked at him, clearly not minding the furious look David was giving him. “As I was saying, today’s events had been very unfortunate. We will have to rebuild our entire operation from scratch and it will set us back a few months, at least. But we are confident we will be able to catch this guy eventually, so we will not pursue charges against Emma.” He now looked at her sternly, “But you will stay away from this, Emma.”

“Killian, I can’t-” She started but he cut her off.

“Swan, I will lock you up if I have to. Don’t test me.” He threatened.

“Hey! Don’t talk to her like that!” David intervened.

“Back off, mate.” Killian replied. “In case you haven’t noticed, this is not Storybrooke. You are not a deputy. The only one carrying a badge in this room, is _me_. And as a police officer, I’m asking your daughter to back off from the investigation of a very dangerous man. I’m trying to protect her. _Which is_ _legally my job_. So I’d suggest you watch your tone, mate.”

He was oozing confidence and authority and Emma could not tear her eyes away from him standing there, facing his father, all the force of reason standing behind him. It was mesmerizing.

“Alright, I think we all need to calm down.” Mary Margaret intervened. “Ho-Killian, we understand. If it’s ok, we’ll leave with Emma now and sort this out with her. Good luck with your investigation.”

Killian bowed at her, “Thank you, milady. I hope all is well with you and your little one.”

“It is, thank you for asking.” Mary Margaret replied kindly before motioning David and Emma out of the room

Killian turned around and watched them leave, struggling with the part of himself that wanted to go after her. He’d worked so hard these past years to build this life, he couldn’t risk it. Not even for her.

“Swan…” He called for her and she turned around looking at him with her beautiful green eyes.

“Yes?” She asked.

“Take care.” He tried to infuse the words with all the things he could not say to her.

“It was good seeing you, Killian.” She replied before she turned around and left with her parents.


	7. The Search

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos!!  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

Emma was sitting in the couch on her apartment browsing the internet in her tablet. David, Mary Margaret and Henry were also scattered around, all of them looking for information about Hook. Her little brother was toddling around, playing with Henry’s old car collection.

“It all checks in,” She said.

“Well, Regina was always very thorough with these things.” David commented.

“But why would she do it?” Mary Margaret asked.

“I don’t know.” Henry said. “I once asked her if she knew about Killian and the only thing she said was that he chose to left town. She never mentioned any of this.”

“Well, she built him quite a life,” Emma replied going back to the information.

“Yes, but Emma, look at some of this stuff.” Mary Margaret motioned and they all went to look at her screen, “Look at the dates, this is recent.”

There were some articles about Killian’s cases and his contributions to several important investigations, including praises to his outstanding police work. All of them were from the past three years.

“He did all this. He actually did all this.” David said in awe.

“He’s a hero.” Henry commented in a matter-of-fact tone.

One of the articles caught Emma’s attention. It was a story of Killian receiving Certificate of Merit for Outstanding Performance in a Life Threatening Situation and it had a couple of pictures of him in his uniform. If Killian in a pirate garb or modern clothes wasn’t enough, Killian Jones in uniform was probably every woman’s fantasy. Or at least, it seemed it was hers, as she could not tear her eyes away from the picture. But it was the second picture the one that made her freeze. It was Killian in uniform again, next to a brunette woman, holding hands and looking at each other. She was looking at him with adoring eyes. Emma’s eyes focused on his expression. He was looking at the brunette with tenderness and affection.

A wave of jealousy washed over her. She’d never felt this way. The discomfort she felt around Tamara did not come near to what she was feeling right now. It was eating her on the inside.

Mary Margaret looked at her daughter and then to the screen.

“Hey, let’s go make some tea.” She said as she went to the kitchen and Emma followed.

“Emma, are you ok?” Mary Margaret asked once she ensured David and Henry could not hear them.

“I’m fine, it’s just that I never thought – you know…” Emma trailed off.

“Emma, you couldn’t have expected him not to move on… It’s been three years.” Mary Margaret offered.

“He said there wasn’t anyone.”

“You asked him?” Mary Margaret sounded surprised.

Emma blushed, “It kind of came up.”

“In between you seeing him again for the first time in three years and being locked up for interfering with a police investigation, the subject of his love life came up?”

“Why would he lie about it?”

“He probably didn’t. Perhaps they broke up.” Mary Margaret offered. “Emma, you clearly can’t expect him not to continue with his life after you decided to come back to New York.”

“This is crazy. None of this is real.” Emma said.

“It’s real to him now, Emma.”

“He’s not a cop. He’s a _pirate_.” Emma blurted.

“And I’m not a schoolteacher. I’m Snow White.” Mary Margaret replied. “Yet, every day I head to an elementary school in Queens to teach. This is my life now. I’m a schoolteacher, David works at an animal shelter. And Hook is a police detective.”

Emma played with her cup of tea, trying to make sense of it all. Mary Margaret sighed.

“I know that perhaps it’s hard for you to understand, even if you have two sets of memories, you were always just one person. You were always Emma Swan. But it’s not that easy…”

“He was always Hook. It’s not the same as you guys. He chose to be someone else.”

“He chose to move on.” Mary Margaret continued. She could sense her daughter was not going to like what she had to said, but she had to say it. “Emma, look at me.”

Emma looked at her. Mary Margaret smiled.

“Hook was in love with you, Emma. There’s no need to beat around the bush on that one anymore. He loved you. He risked everything to find you and bring you home; he fought next to you to defeat Zelena. And when that was finally done, he asked you to stay with him. To give you both a chance for a happy ending. You said no and you chose to move here. I’m not questioning your decision, you did what your heart told you at that time… but what was he supposed to do? Stay in Storybrooke where everyone knew about his past? Stay in the same town as Gold, who is a constant reminder of the love that he lost? He chose to move on and build a new life. I don’t think we should judge him for it for seizing a second opportunity at life”

“Everyone deserves a second chance…. That is what you always say.” Emma smiled.

“Yes, and it seems he took that chance and built a good life for him.”

Emma sighed. “So what should I do now? I don’t want to give up this case.”

“That is for you to decide, Emma; but if you feel so strongly about staying involved in the case, perhaps you should talk to him again.”

“Perhaps I should.”

“Just be careful. He might have a new life, but there’s a lot of history between you too that he might not want to revisit. Or he might want answers that you don’t want to give him.” Mary Margaret replied.

“That is over. There was never something to begin with.” Emma quickly replied.

From the look on Emma’s face, Mary Margaret sensed that it was from being over.


	8. The Proposal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kuddos!!  
> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

 

_You're dangerous 'cause you're honest_  
You're dangerous, you don't know what you want  
Well you left my heart empty as a vacant lot  
For any spirit to haunt  
 **Who’s gonna ride your wild horses, U2**

Early the next morning, Emma found herself at his apartment door. He wasn’t hard to find, now that she knew what to look for; and it made sense, in a way. Of course he’d live near the ocean, in a place that at least had a decent view to the sea he loved so much.

Once again, his flat was probably not something that could be afforded in a cop’s salary; and he owned it. She made a mental note to talk to Regina about this. Something was not adding up: she could understand Regina helping him set up a new identity, but she pretty much handed Hook a very comfortable life, money wise. There was something missing in this story and she intended to find out about it eventually.

But for now, she had another issue to tackle. She knocked on the door and waited.

A moment later, Killian answered the door wearing only some denims, his hair wet. Emma’s jaw dropped as her eyes roamed through his bare chest, adorned only by his charm necklace. His wet hair was dripping over his chest hair and she could feel the heat running through her body.

Killian cleared his throat and brought her back to reality. She lifted her eyes to look at him, her cheeks flushed. He was smirking at her, the bastard. He knew exactly the effect he was having on her and he was enjoying it.

“Are you stalking me, Swan?” He asked.

“We need to talk.” She said and before he could reply with any of his famous innuendos, she lifted the two cups of coffee she was carrying. “Can I come in?”

He sighed but let her in. “Come in; let me get my shirt on. Otherwise, I don’t think you’d be able to do much talking, love.”

She rolled her eyes while he headed to the bedroom. She took the time to look at the place. It was definitely not what she’d pictured in her mind. It was very minimalistic, with sparse wooden furniture but it had a comfortable look all around. It felt like home, like a place she could spend hours in. She shook her head to chase those thoughts away and she entertained herself browsing his music collection.

“So tell me,” She called out, “Did Regina infuse a taste for 80’s music along with your police knowledge?”

“Clever, Swan.” He replied entering the room. “Because a _pirate_ like meself can’t actually find that music to be of his taste…”

She turned around to look at him. He had a blue button shirt with a couple of buttons open, showing a white shirt underneath. The sleeves were rolled up, showing his forearms. He was resting on the kitchen counter, sipping the coffee she brought for him and looking at her.

“What do you want, Swan?” He asked waggling his eyebrows at her.

“What makes you think I want something?” She deflected.

“You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.” He said and she could sense the sad undertone in his voice. Guilt crept on her. _Did he really think that little of her?_

“Don’t say that…” She said softly.

“Stop avoiding the question, Emma.” He pressed. “ _What do you want_?”

“I want in. I want to be part of the investigation.”

Of course she’d want to be part of this. Leave it to her to stubbornly want to be part of something dangerous and life threatening.

“Have I not made myself clear yesterday, love?” Killian sighed. “I know it was never easy for you to wrap your head around this, but I need you to trust me. This is extremely dangerous. This guy already got away and he knows someone is after him. We have to be very careful.”

“I know.” She said. “But you are also a police officer. You have to play by the rules. I don’t. That can be an advantage.”

“I might be a cop, Swan, but I know how to bend the rules as well…” He smirked at her. “Once a pirate, always a pirate, love.”

She smirked back, “You still have to play by the book, Killian, especially if you are after a promotion. I don’t. I can cut a lot of corners that you can’t and get information a lot faster than you might.”

He thought about it. She had a good point, but it was still too dangerous.

“Swan, this lowlife won’t hesitate to retaliate if he feels something is up.”

“I know… I can be careful. I’ve done my job for several years, Killian. I know where to look and where not to look in cases like this. _Trust me_.”

He looked at her, standing expectantly in his living room, all smiles and determination.

_When had he been able to say no to her?_

He sighed again and went to put on his shoulder holster, securing his gun.

“I need to talk to Mac about this. Come by the station this evening.”

She smiled at him and the fear of something happening to her crept on him. He had to set up some ground rules.

“You listen to me, Swan. _If_ we agree to do this, _I_ call the shots. I make the decisions. That is not open to discussion. This will not be like Storybrooke where you made the decisions and I followed you around. You will listen to me and if I tell you to back off or that it is too dangerous, you will follow suit. I captain this ship, Swan.”

She nodded, “You won’t regret this, I promise.”

“I already do, love.” He said as he grabbed his jacket and opened the door for her to leave his apartment.


	9. The Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank my beta Khiori for her review and laschatzi for her constant support!

“Good morning, sunshine. You look like you had an interesting evening.” Mac greeted him as he entered the station.

“Make it an early morning, mate.” Killian said. “Emma Swan showed up on my door this morning.”

“Really? I didn’t know you’d given her your address.”

“I didn’t, but that is what she does. She finds people… it’s a family business, one could say.”

“And what did the lovely Miss Swan want?” Mac asked. He was enjoying this a little too much, if he was honest. Killian, who was always very confident, seemed to be out of sorts around this woman.

“Oh, I wished I could say she wanted to seduce me into spending the entire day in bed with her,” Killian said conjuring that mental image to quickly push it away. “But alas, she wanted to be part of this investigation. I told her I needed to talk to you about it.”

Mac looked at him pointedly, “This is your operation, mate. You don’t need to run this by me and you know it. The question then is… why did you stall?”

“I don’t know, mate.” Killian sighed.

“Don’t lie to your partner, Killian. It’s bad form.” Mac pointed out to him. Killian smiled at that. “What do you want to do about this?”

“She has a point. She’s good at what she does, probably the best. She’d be able to get a lot of information we can’t get…” Killian started.

“But….”

“But I don’t want hear anywhere near this maniac. This is too dangerous…”

“For her or for you?” Mac asked.

Killian looked at him surprised and then sighed. He should have known he’d not be able to fool Mac.

“I don’t know, mate.” He admitted.

“You want my advice? I say we take a leap of faith and let her in. Who knows, even if we don’t get Thomas – and I’m sure we will get the bastard– you might walk out of this whole thing with a girlfriend.” Mac suggested smirking.

“That is completely out of the question. This will be strictly professional, mate. I have no intention in pursuing the lady Swan.” _Again._   

“Yeah, right. Tell that to your face, partner.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know this is short, it counts more like a scene than a chapter. There will be another chapter tomorrow :)  
> Be Patient :P


	10. The Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank Jess and Sandra for their reviews and inspiration. I really loved writing this particular chapter :)

Killian spent the rest of the day going over paperwork and information from the investigation. It was clear to him that he could use Emma’s help to access information the police would never be able to get their hands on in time, but the thought of working next to her every day was already getting him nervous.

“Detective, some is here to see you.” He heard an officer said and he lifted his head from the paperwork.

Henry was standing there looking nervously at him.

“Hi Killian.”

“Henry, lad.” Killian smiled. “How did you get here?”

“I’m fifteen, Killian. I know how to take the bus.” Henry rolled his eyes.

“Right, I forgot.” Killian smiled. “Does your mother know you are here? Any of them?” He raised his eyebrow at Henry.

“No, they don’t. But I wanted to talk to you…”

Killian sighed, pointing to the office nearby, “Come with me, lad.”

“So…” Henry started once they were settled on the office. “You left Storybrooke.”

“There was nothing left for me to stay, to be honest; and there was no way to return to the Enchanted Forest – not that there was anything left there either. I figured leaving town to start again was a path as good as any other. All I had to do was try it.”

“You are a cop now.”

“Aye, lad.” Killian sighed. “You mother, Regina, helped me a little to get all this started.”

“Did she make you a cop or did you ask her?”

Killian looked at him intrigued… “Does it make a difference, lad?” But from the way he was looking at him, he knew it mattered to Henry and he didn’t want to lie to the lad. “I chose it.” He admitted.

“You chose to be a detective.” Henry said.

“I felt it was something I could do, that I _wanted_ to do.”

“Why?” Henry asked.

Killian had never shared his motivation with Regina, nor did he intend to share it with Emma. But Henry was different.

“Did I ever tell you the tale of my brother Liam?” Killian asked and Henry shook his head. “Liam and I were both members of the Royal Navy of our kingdom. He was captain of the _Jewel of the Realm_ and I was a young lieutenant. One day the King sent us on mission to retrieve a medicinal plant from a foreign realm. A hero’s journey.” Killian smirked sadly. “We set sail to Neverland.”

“Neverland?”

“Aye.” Killian said. “And the medicinal plant was none other than dreamshade, the desire of a corrupt king to fight his wars without honor. Liam wouldn’t believe me and he cut himself with it. I saw him dying in front of me. Pan showed me the water that saved his life, but the moment we set sail back, Liam finally died on his cabin, in my arms. I lost my brother for the vicious desires of a corrupt king.”

“That’s how you became a pirate.” Henry concluded.

“Aye, I took the ship and it became the _Jolly Roger_ and I never looked back as I set to pillage, plunder and take my revenge on the king’s ships.” Killian took a deep breath. “You are pretty familiar with the rest of the tale, I presume.”

Henry nodded.

“When Regina offered me a chance to build a new life, I really thought over what I wanted to do. My mind drifted to Liam, how good and brave he was, serving his kingdom for the good. And I knew I wanted to make him proud of me again. I lost my way many centuries ago, but I was given a chance to start over.” Killian smiled. “So here I am, Lieutenant Jones again, and trying to become Captain by promotion and not mutiny this time. I know it doesn’t make up for all the wrong that I’ve done in the past, but for the life I get to live now, I’ll try to do the right thing.”

Henry looked at him again, “You are a hero, Killian.”

“No, lad. I’m just an old pirate trying to honor the memory of his brother.”

“You could have chosen anything. And you chose to fight the bad guys. Defeating the villains is what heroes do.” Henry smiled at him. “I just thought someone should remind you of that.”   

Killian’s eyes welled up with tears and he nodded at Henry with gratitude. Those words meant so much to him.

Henry took a deep breath and changed the subject, “Do you still sail?”

“Aye, I have a boat. It’s nothing like the Jolly, of course, but it’s a nice modern boat.” Killian said.

“Would you take me sailing again someday?” Henry asked, “I mean- if you want to…”

“I’d be honored, lad.” Killian said. “And now get out of here before your mother finds out and starts yelling at me.”

“I’m staying at Regina’s today.” Henry said.

“That’s no better, she can cast curses, remember?” Killian smirked.

“Right.” Henry smiled. “It was nice seeing you, Killian.”

As he started to leave, Killian called out to him.

“Henry, if you ever need anything or someone to talk to… you know you can come to me, lad, right?” He said.

“I’ll keep that in mind…” He replied before leaving.

Killian watched him leave. Henry looked so much like his father at his age; it was almost painful for him to see. And Milah, his resemblance to Milah was uncanny. 

“Who was that?” Mac asked.

“Emma’s lad” Killian replied.

“Seems like a good kid.”

“He is.” Killian smiled.

“He doesn’t look like her.” Mac said.

“Takes after his father.” Killian offered.

“You knew him?”

“Aye, he was a friend.” Killian admitted.

“Where is he now?”

“He died almost four years ago.” Killian sighed, running his hand though his hair.

“Damn, Killian, I didn’t know.” Mac sounded guilty.

“It’s fine.” Killian scratched the back of his neck, he needed to get out of there, he needed to deal with his emotions before Emma showed up. “Listen, I need to get some air. If Emma comes, tell her to wait for me, please?”

Mac nodded. Killian grabbed his jacket and headed out.


	11. The Deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for your comments and kudos! Updates will be a little more sporadic, every other day or every 2 days as I continue working on this piece.  
> Also, warning: Angst is coming. And it will hit hard. Be warned. :)

Killian came back to the station carrying three Styrofoam cups. As he walked in, he found Emma waiting for him sitting on his desk, talking animatedly with Mac.

“Do I even want to know?” He asked as he put the cups on the desk and handed one to Mac.

“Not really.” Mac teased. “I was just entertaining your friend with some good police stories. You know, the type where I look great and you look like a klutz.”

“Yes, I seem to recall those are your wife’s favorites.” Killian smirked at his partner and Mac raised his hand in surrender.

“Swan.” He smiled as he handed her a cup. “Hot cocoa with cinnamon for you.”

“Thanks, Killian.” She smiled at him as she took a sip, her eyes never leaving his. Killian felt a rush of heat all over his body.

_Yes, this was a great idea, mate._

“Let’s get started, shall we?” Killian said as he headed over the opposite desk and rested against it.

“Do you ever sit down on a chair?” Emma asked.

“You know it’s not quite my style, Swan.” He wiggled his eyebrows at her, sipping his coffee. She smirked back raising an eyebrow at him. 

_Yes, definitely a brilliant idea._

They looked at each other for a moment, both waiting for the other to avert their gaze first, but as each second passed, their looks were less guarded and old feelings started to creep in, filling the room with an electrical intensity.

Mac cleared his throat, bringing them out of their stupor.

“Can we _actually start_ or do you both prefer to continue making eyes at each other? ‘Cause I’m fine either way….”

Killian smirked at his partner.

“Alright then.” Mac said. “Emma, I’m not sure how familiar you are with this guy, but as Killian pointed out yesterday, we think he’s responsible for several major crimes here in New Jersey. We had gotten a tip about his whereabouts for yesterday and we had set up an operation to close down on him and arrest him. Killian and his team were waiting for him outside the diner but you called out to him and he started running.”

“And you know what happened after that.” Killian added.

“You crashed into me sending me to the floor. Yeah, I know, I have the bruises.” Emma replied.

“Apologies, lass.”

“Ok, so where do we go from here?” Mac asked. “I don’t think he’d be back there or go to any of the hiding places we have identified.”

“He might.” Emma said.

“Why would he do that?” Killian asked.

“I spoke with a few sources today, did some digging up.” Emma replied. “This guy is an asshole, you already know that. But it seems he’s very full of himself. He got away yesterday, he might think he is safe and has nothing to worry about. He might even get cockier.”

“Overconfidence.” Killian pondered the idea, “That is a common sin for treacherous villains. It might be the weakness that can lead to his undoing.”

“Treacherous? Undoing? Tone it down, mate, it’s not Halloween.” Mac teased. “There’s no need for the flowery language just because you want to impress Emma here.”

Killian blushed and Emma chuckled a little, a bright smile enlightening her face, reaching her eyes. She had missed hearing him speak like that. She risked a look at him; he was scratching his neck, like he always did when he was embarrassed. She’d missed that.

_God, she’d missed him._

The realization ripped her apart. She’d missed him every day of those three years without knowing it – or perhaps, without admitting it. And there he was, standing in front of her, modern clothes, modern language but the same old spirit underneath. He was breathtaking.

Killian’s voice shook her from her daze, “So… what do you suggest, love?” He looked at her like he used to do, with trust and confidence in her.

“I was able to get the address where he was staying. Perhaps it’s worth a shot to check it tomorrow and see if someone turns up or not.” She proposed.

“A stakeout then. Good idea.” Mac agreed.

“OK, Mac, you’ll stay here and start raiding all the other places we had information on. See if something comes up there.” Killian decided. “Swan, you and I are on stakeout duty tomorrow. Meet me here early and we’ll go.”

“I can pick you up at your apartment and we can drive there.” She offered.

“We’re not taking your car, lass. He might have seen it yesterday… and a yellow bug stands out. We’ll take mine.” Killian explained.

“If that is settled then, I have a wife to get home to.” Mac said. “See you tomorrow morning. Don’t stay up too late kids.” He called on his way out.

Emma looked at Killian, who was finishing his coffee. “Are you ok with this?”

“You were right, Emma. I could use your help. But the deal still stands. You’ll back off the minute I say so.” He finished in a serious tone.

“I’ll be fine, I know how to take care of myself.” She replied dismissively.

“No, lass. I mean it.” He said as he walked to where she was sitting, lowering his head so she could meet his eyes, his face inches from hers. “Promise me, Swan.” He whispered.

She swallowed hard. “I promise.” She whispered.

He stood there for a moment, hesitant. He only had to lean in one more inch and he could kiss her… just one more inch. She was as mesmerizing as he remembered. And her walls were as up as he remembered as well. He sighed and pulled away, standing up. She stood up as well.

“I should go.” She said.

“See you tomorrow, Swan.” He whispered as she was leaving.

“Goodbye, Killian.”


	12. The Stakeout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kudos! And to Jess and Sandra for reviewing this and encouraging me to write it.  
> As promised, the angst.

_Well you have no right to ask me how I feel_  
You have no right to speak to me so kind  
 **Separate Lives, Phil Collins**

Emma showed up at the station earlier the next morning and she found Mac and Killian going over a map that was spread over the desk. Killian raised his head and smiled at her.

“Good morning, Swan.”

“Good morning.” She replied as she approached them. “Ready for a stakeout?”

Killian looked at her with mischief in his eyes, “Am I ready to be trapped with you on a small compartment for several hours?” He got closer, his face hovering hers. “ _Always_.”

She rolled her eyes at him. Killian bit his lower lip, enjoying the familiar banter for a second. He turned around to face a very amused Mac, who was watching the scene with interest. Mac raised an eyebrow at him. Killian shrugged.

“Alright, then.” Killian said. “Mac, you know where to start with the raids. Keep me posted on the outcomes. Ok, mate?”

“Will do. But before you leave, I have something for you.” Mac said as he produced a brown wrapped package. “I mentioned to Laura that you had a stakeout today.”

“Oh, that’s more like it.” Killian praised as he waved his hand in the air. “Tell you lovely wife I’m thankful for her kindness and I’m definitely not worthy of such attentions.”

“Yeah, yeah… I told her you were not worth the hassle, but she thinks you are.” Mac shrugged.

“What is that?” Emma asked

“It’s not a stakeout if we don’t have cannoli.” Mac said. “It’s a tradition for us, you would say.”

“And don’t even think for a minute that you are getting one, Swan. I don’t like you _that_ much.” Killian said as he grabbed his coat from the hanger and put it on. It was not a leather jacket, she noticed, but a navy blue coat with two button rows. It made his eyes even bluer. He grabbed the package and adjusted it to his left arm.

“I mentioned to Laura that you’d be having company, so she made some extras.” Mac pointed out. “Be nice and share.”

“Ok, maybe just one if you are _truly nice_ to me.” Killian smirked at Emma.

“Got everything you need?”  Mac asked.

“I think I do. Rules are simple: leave the gun, take the cannoli.” Killian replied looking at Mac.

Emma was lost. _Leave the gun, take the cannoli?!?_

“Are you quoting _The Godfather_?” She asked dumbfounded and Killian shot her a dagger look.

“Why wouldn’t I? It’s one of my favorite movies, _love_.” He spoke shortly and looked at her pointedly. _Don’t break my cover, Swan._ “Alright, let’s go. Swan, first round of coffee is on you.” He said as he headed for the exit.  


They were sitting on Killian’s car early in the afternoon, sipping coffee. There had been no movement at the address that they were checking. Emma reached out to the cannoli box.

“Don’t you even think so, Swan.” Killian warned, his eyes never leaving sight of the house they were watching.

“Mac said you had to share.” She replied.

“Aye, and I did.” He said tilting his head and raising his eyebrows. “You had three already. I had two, that one is mine.”

“You’re keeping tabs?” She asked offended.

“I’m very protective of my loot, Swan. You should know that already.” He smirked at her.

“I must’ve forgotten, I got confused about what I knew about you when you started quoting _The Godfather._ ” She retorted, a fake smile on her face.

“Aye, about that,” He said, his tone changing to a masqueraded impatience, “Next time, try to keep up. I know you are a terrible liar, but try to at least pretend not to be surprised about my knowledge of modern references.”

“Are you afraid I’d blow your cover and someone will start asking questions?”

“It’s not a cover, Swan.” He replied with anger in his voice, “ _It’s my life.”_

“Not a cover, really? _Youngest detective to make Captain_? How _old_ do they think you are?” She looked at him.

“I’m 35 years old.” He replied defiantly.

“35, uh? Didn’t you lose a tenth multiplier somewhere?” She snarked at him.

“Why does this bother you, love?” He spat. “It’s not like I am doing any of this to infuriate you.”

“It’s weird, Ok?” She said. “You are _Hook_ and you are wearing a _navy blue blazer_ and drinking coffee. Where are the rum flask and the leather coat?”

“All of this because of a _coat_?” Killian sounded surprised. “Bloody hell, Swan, it’s too cold today for a leather jacket.”

“This coming from the man who paraded around the Maine winter almost barechested… and it’s not just that the coat!” She spat “Your rings are gone, your earring is different and you look too _normal_.”

“And that is a bad thing?” He sighed. “Swan, when I decided to settle for this world, I had to start dressing the part. I traded the leather breeches for jeans, bought some sweaters, shirts. I couldn’t use the hook anymore; it was too _dangerous_ for this world, so I got a new hand. Then I lost the flashy jewelry.” He smiled pensive. “Most of it, at least. I kept the necklace and traded the rings for just one single engraved band. I didn’t plan it all, some of it just happened…”

“Like the leather bracelets?” She asked intrigued.

He smiled sadly, “Actually, those were Rebecca’s idea.”

“Rebecca?” She raised her eyebrows in surprise.

He sighed and smiled sadly, looking at her with indecipherable eyes. “My ex.”

It was as if she were hit by a car. An ex. He had an ex girlfriend. _He had had a girlfriend._

“Your ex?” She asked with a broken voice.

“Aye...” He said, not meeting her eyes. “We were at this stupid craft fair she dragged me to and she saw them in one of the stands. She thought they were a good match for my ring.”

He finally risked a look at her and could see the confusion and hurt in her eyes.

“What happened?” She asked, avoiding his gaze.

“It didn’t work out. We broke up over two years ago.”

The pain cut her like a knife, like a sword blade.  Two years ago. He’d gotten in a relationship almost right after leaving Storybrooke. Anger and jealousy took over her as she saw him fidgeting with the bracelets with his prosthetic hand.  

“So, you’re still wearing your ex’s tokens” She stated coldly.

He gave her an annoyed look, “She did not buy them for me, she only suggested it would be a good look and _I_ bought them. And why is that a problem? I see that you still carry your swan necklace and the shoelace on your wrist…”

“That is different.” She spat.

“Why? Because they died and Rebecca didn’t and we just broke up? That somehow nullifies the idea of wearing a token from a previous relationship? I don’t wear this because I still have feelings for her… I wear it because it meant something. She meant something to me. She saved me.” He finished, sighing.

“She saved you?” Another sword blade passed through her, ripping her apart.

“Aye, she did. Even if it didn’t work out, she got me to open up, to build a life, to stop sulking in my apartment and actually _live_ my life. I will always owe her for that. Even if I couldn’t love her the way she deserved, she meant something.”

“She was one of the things that _sort of happened_?” She asked bitterly.

“I won’t answer that, Swan.” He replied shortly. “You have no right to question me. _You_ pushed me away.”

“And so you just packed your stuff and moved directly into a new life with new clothes, a new car and a new girlfriend…”

“That is not what happened. I had to get out of there. _I had nothing left_ …”

She could feel the pain in his voice, but anger had taken over her and she didn’t care about his pain.

“It’s almost ironic you say you had nothing and three years later we are sitting on your brand new Mustang.”

“ _What!?_ ” He asked surprised.

“How do you even afford a car like this with your salary? Or the apartment you _own_? Or that pretty boat of yours that is stationed at the marina?” She asked.

“You’ve been spying on me, love?” He raised one eyebrow at her questioningly.

“You lead a pretty nice life for a cop’s salary, Killian.” 

“I got a sweet deal out of the Evil Queen. It gives me certain comforts…” He replied nonchalantly.

“What are you not telling me about that deal? All magic comes with a price. What was yours?”

“That’s none of your business, love.” He responded sharply.

“You are lying to me, Killian.” Emma said.

“I don’t have to bloody tell you anything, Swan.” Killian retorted.

He remained silent and she could feel the frustration seeping through her.

“Hook, talk to me!” She yelled.

His hand hit the steering wheel in frustration. “Don’t do this to me, Swan.” He pleaded. “I’ve stayed the bloody hell away from your life for the past three years and I had no intention to cross paths with you again. You came barging back into my path, Emma. Whatever you think you are entitled to know, let it be. Let _me_ be.”

“I can’t.” She said. “If you cut a deal, if this going to come back to any of us…”

“It won’t.” He promised.

They remained silent for the rest of the afternoon. There was no movement in the house they were monitoring. Killian drove them back to the station and parked the car in silence. As Emma reached for the door, his hand stopped her.

“Henry came by the station yesterday.” He told her.

“Henry?” She asked surprised. 

“Aye. He wanted to talk and…” He hesitated. “He asked me to take him sailing sometime.” He looked at her. “I’d love to do it; I’d love to spend time with him but…” His voice broke, “I’ll understand if you don’t want me near him. But I won’t lie to him, Emma. If you don’t want me to see him, you’ll have to tell him.”

“Ok. That’s fair.” She said and she reached for the car again.

“Swan… About earlier.” He said. “Are you sure that was just about your need to know?”

“What else would it be about?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “The fact that I’ve moved on?” He asked intently, his blue eyes boring into her.

She did not reply to him as she got out of the car and headed towards her yellow bug. He sat there, watching her leave.

_Yes, definitely a brilliant idea, mate._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to go run and hide now...


	13. The Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be an update today and one more chapter tomorrow. There's angst, I warn you!  
> After that, it will take me a few more days to update again. I hope you understand.  
> Once again, all the love in the world to Jess and Sandra, my constant supporters on this.

Emma was hurt and frustrated as she opened the door to her apartment. She found Henry, Regina, David and Mary Margaret having tea together, waiting for her. Her little brother was toddling around, fascinated with Henry’s old electrical train.

“Mom.” Henry said. “I was waiting to see you before leaving with Regina.”

“Good afternoon, Emma.” Regina greeted.

“Good, you are both still here.” Emma said shortly. “We have to talk.”

“Emma, is everything ok?” Mary Margaret asked concerned.

Emma turned to face Henry. “You went to see Hook yesterday?”

Henry blushed and Regina looked at him shocked. “You found Hook? How?”

David sighed, “Emma ran into him the other day during one of her cases.”

“And how is our dear lieutenant? Did he make it to captain already?” Regina asked.

“We’ll get to that in a minute.” Emma replied and turned to Henry. “Henry?”

“Yes. I went to see him.” Henry admitted.

“Why?” Emma asked.

“I wanted to see him!” Henry replied honestly. “I just wanted to ask him about his new life and how he was doing…” He trailed off.

“Did you ask him to take you sailing?” Emma asked again.

“Yes.” Henry admitted.

“Henry, I’m not sure that is a good idea…” Emma started.

Henry looked hurt. “Why? He doesn’t want to see me?”

Emma thought how easy it’d be to say yes. But she couldn’t lie to Henry and she knew Killian didn’t deserve it.

“No, not at all. He’s thrilled about spending time with you. It’s just…” She trailed off.

“ _You_ don’t want me to spend time with him.” Henry said. “Why?”

“It’s complicated…” Emma started.

“It’s always complicated between you and Killian, mom.” Henry said. “But I’m not a kid anymore, don’t lie to me.”

“I just don’t know… this new life of his, something seems off.” Emma said.

“But I want to see him. I’ve missed him.” Henry pleaded.

“Emma…” Regina interjected, “If Henry wants to go sailing with Hook, that wouldn’t be a problem for me.”

Emma looked at her, a mix of anger and surprise. “ _You are ok with this_?”

“Why not?” Regina retorted. “Our dear captain has built a good life for himself, I don’t see any reason for him not to spend time with Henry if both like to do it.”

“Built a life? _You mean the one you handed to him and forgot to mention all about it_?” Emma spat.

Regina was surprised by the emotions in Emma’s words. “He asked me not to. I wasn’t going to betray his confidence.”

Emma raised her eyebrows, “So now you are confidants?”

“Emma, what is wrong with you?” Regina retorted.

“You tell me, Regina. I understand helping him set up a new life with a few things, but you handed him a very comfortable life: a house, brand new car, a boat. _Why_?”

“I did it for Henry.” Regina acknowledged, “Whatever the reasons Hook had to do what he did, he’s the reason I was able to be reunited with my son. _Twice._ And as misguided as his ‘kidnapping and send him to New York attempt’ was, he did it to protect Henry. I owed him much more than what he was willing to take.”

“More? You owed him more?” Emma asked.

“Henry,” Regina said, “Perhaps it’s best if you leave us alone for a moment.” It was clear that Regina was hiding something and Emma was fed up with secrecy.

“No! I want to know.” Henry stated.

“You don’t want him to hear what you did?” Emma retorted.

“No, Emma, I didn’t want him to hear what _you_ did.” Regina spat. “But well, you left me with no choice.” Regina took a deep breath, “When Hook came to me, he only asked for advice on how to reach the next town and perhaps some basic knowledge on how to live a modern life. That is _all he asked_. It was clear he was determined to leave, so I offered him the chance to build an identity for himself, and a more secure chance to start over.”

“Why this life?” Emma asked

“This is what _he chose_. If it were for me, I would have made him a jet set millionaire who didn’t need to work a day in his life and could parade around his yacht with as many women as he wanted.” Regina had the satisfaction of seeing Emma cringe at the image. “But no, Hook wanted to lead a _decent life_. So we sat and down and built him this one. And yes, I gave him enough money to buy a prosthetic hand, a house, a boat and a car and more if he wanted. And I’d do it again if I had to.”

“What was the price?” Emma asked.

“ _What_?” Regina sounded surprised.

“All magic comes with a price.” Emma stated. “What was yours? What is this going to cost him? Or us? _What was the price?!?”_

Regina looked at Mary Margaret and David, who were listening intently to the conversation. They exchanged worried looks.

“The price? There was no price.” Regina replied calmly. “Emma, we walked out of the second curse more or less undamaged. Some of us, actually, came out of it in better shape. I got to meet Robin, your parents had a second child.” She smiled at the toddler playing. “He came out of it empty handed. He had nothing left. _He sacrificed everything to save us and came out of it without anything_.”

Emma looked at them dumbfounded. “He sacrificed everything?”

Regina looked at Mary Margaret, “He never told her.” She sighed.

Mary Margaret smiled sadly, “Of course he didn’t.”

“Told me what? What are you talking about?” Emma asked confused.

“Emma, how do you think Hook reached you in New York?” Regina questioned.

“I don’t know, he opened a portal somehow.” Emma replied.

“You can only open a portal with a magic bean, Emma.” David said. “And those are not easy to find. The crops were destroyed by the giants.”

“Yes, yes, I know all this.” Emma said frustrated, “What is the point?”

“Emma, how do you think Hook got hold of a bean?” Mary Margaret asked gently.

“He probably made a deal or something, I don’t know.”

“And what _exactly_ do you think he used to make that deal?” Regina asked, “What did he have that was _valuable enough_ to get him a bean?”

_No. NO. It cannot be._ Emma chocked, tears coming to her eyes. She looked at David for confirmation.

David nodded, “He traded the _Jolly Roger_ for the bean, Emma.”

_His ship. He traded his hip, his home, everything he had. He traded that for the chance to find her._

“Emma, we thought you knew…” Mary Margaret continued gently. “We thought he told you when he asked you to stay.”

Emma’s heart was beating fast against her chest, emotions flooding over her. His ship. His only possession, the place he called home for centuries.

“Milah died on that ship.” She whispered. He gave up the place that held the last memory of Milah.

“Liam too…” Henry added and they all looked at him. “His brother. It was originally his ship. It was a Royal Navy ship, _The Jewel of the Realm_ , Liam was the Captain, Killian was a Lieutenant. Hook took it after Liam died on a mission in Neverland. The king sent them there to retrieve the dreamshade, telling Liam it was a medicinal plant. After he lost his brother to a corrupt king, Hook took the ship and became a pirate.”

Emma felt the nausea invading her. His brother’s ship. Hook barely mentioned his brother, it was a painful memory he kept inside. And the _Jolly Roger_ held the memories of the time spent with him. Sailing with Liam, his captain. _Lieutenant Jones_.

_It’s my rank, Swan._

Her eyes welled up with tears as she looked at Henry and she saw her thoughts mirrored in her son’s face.

Regina spoke softly, “When you decided to come to New York, Hook was literally left with nothing; not even the hope of a happy ending. I – I just felt he deserved more than that after what he’d sacrificed. I could not give him what he wanted, but I could help him start over when he asked for help, so I did. You might think I gave him a sweet deal, Emma; but I still think he would have given everything just for a chance with you.”  

Emma’s tears started to run down her face.

“Oh, Emma…” Mary Margaret said reaching out to her.

“I – I … I have to talk to him.” Emma said as she stormed out of the apartment. 


	14. The Jolly Roger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is heartbreaking... It's called The Jolly Roger, after all.  
> Thanks to Jess and Sandra for their reviews and encouragement and happy valentine's day! I

_I'm only hanging on_   
_To watch you go down_   
_My love  
_ **So Cruel, U2**

Killian sat on the stool over his kitchen counter, nursing his beer and a shot of rum. He’d changed into his flannel pajama pants and a white t-shirt and was looking at his drinks while wondering where all went wrong.

He knew it was a bad idea letting Emma into the investigation, but he expected at least a few more days before all hell broke loose like that. He finished his rum in one shot and was washing it down with the beer when he heard the knock on the door.

When he opened the door, he found Emma standing in front of him. Her eyes were red, she had been crying.

“Swan, what is it?” He asked concerned. “Did something happen to Henry?” He feared for the lad.

She shook her head before looking at him straight in the eyes. “You traded your ship for me?” Her voice was raw and broken.

_Bloody hell._

“Aye.” He replied in a croaky voice. He knew he couldn’t avoid this anymore, so he stepped aside to allow her to enter his house.

She walked to the middle of the room and removed her jacket before facing him again.

“How?” She whispered.

He sighed. “Does it matter, Swan?”

“Humor me.” She defied him.

“I got the message that the curse was coming. I ditched my crew and took the Jolly Roger as far and as fast as I possibly could to outrun it.”

“You outran a curse…” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.

“I’m a hell of a captain, love.” He smirked sadly. “Once I was outside the curse’s purview, I knew that the walls were down. Transport between the worlds was possible again. All I needed was a magic bean.”

“So you traded the only thing that meant something to you in order to get it.” She looked at him.

He looked away painfully as he nodded.

“You shouldn’t have done it… that was your home, Killian. Your memories…” She trailed off.

“I’d do it again in a heartbeat.” He replied, his blue eyes burning with passion.

She looked at him, pity in her eyes. And that broke him off… he could take almost everything: he could deal with rejection, pain, anger, indifference. But he would not be pitied.

_Captain Hook will not be pitied._

“Why are you here?” He spat.

“I – I had to talk to you… I didn’t know.” She said. “Why did you do it?”

He looked at her intently, passion consuming his eyes, “You know why, Emma. You’ve always known why.”

“Killian…”

The commiserating tone in her voice was ripping him on the inside. “Do you really want to hear it, love?” He gave her a pained look. “I did it because I loved you. I’d have given everything, _done anything_ , for the chance to get to you. Especially if your family or you were in danger. _I just had to reach you_.”

She watched him standing in front of her, wrecked by pain. She slowly approached him, resting her hand on his cheek. “You were never supposed to find out, Swan.” He whispered.

“You should’ve told me…” She said.

“Would it have made a difference?” He asked, his eyes boring into hers.

“I don’t know.” She replied honestly.

He sighed and smiled sadly. “But that is the thing, Emma. When I asked you to stay, it was never about the things I’d done or that I would do for you. It was about the things you’d want to do for me. I would not have it any other way.” He looked at her.  “It doesn’t matter anymore: at the end of the day, it wasn’t enough. _I wasn’t enough for you to stay._ ”

Her heart broke at the sight of him in front of her, the man who sacrificed everything for her, only to come out of it with the losing hand. She couldn’t deal with it; she couldn’t deal with the regret she felt as she relived those moments in which she’d rejected him. She had to stop her head from spinning around, her heart from clenching, _she had to stop feeling_.

He took a step back in surprise as he felt her lips crashing into his, her hand grabbing his neck and pulling him closer to her forcefully. It took him a second to kiss her back with the same passion and intensity, his mind spinning around. She was kissing him, _she was finally kissing him_. Her hands reached desperately for her sweater and she broke the kiss just long enough to pull it over her head and then she was kissing him again, her hands caressing his back through his t-shirt. He had her. He finally had her.

_No, you don’t. She just feels guilty. If you let this happen, it will haunt you down in the end._

He pushed her away, taking two steps back and looking at her with pained determination, “What is this, Swan? You feel guilty because I lost everything so now you are just going to sleep with me as some sort of sick way of paying me back?”

“Killian… that is not…” She tried to explain, but she could not find the words.

“I don’t need this, Swan. If you think you can come here and throw yourself at me as a pity fuck, then you really never understood me, lass.”

He saw the tears in her eyes, the guilt creeping all over her and he knew he had to stop. But he’d bottled this inside for so long, he had to let go. He had to lay it all out and finally let go.

“You used to ask me about that year, Emma. Well, lass, here’s the truth I kept from you: I ditched your parents as soon as we arrived, determined to find my ship. When I couldn’t find her, I took to pirating the roads, which was a very profitable activity. I didn’t help Ariel, as you all think: I left her prince adrift so I could get back _my ship,_ only because Blackbeard accused me of going soft. I lived with that regret every single day, and that is why Zelena was able to curse my lips. But back in the Enchanted Forest, I couldn’t go back to be the pirate I once was, because there was not a day that went by that you were not constantly in my mind. I traded a prince’s life as a last chance to forget you and I failed.” He looked at her, pain and self-loathe in his eyes. “Once I outran the curse and went looking for a bean, do you know who I had to trade with?”

She seemed to read his thoughts at that moment, “Blackbeard.”

“Aye. He made me beg and plead, he made me admit that I was just a poor excuse of a pirate, a lovefool who had gone soft and was now reduced to be the messenger of the royal family. A fool in love with a princess who would never look at him the same way.”

Emma’s eyes filled with tears as she felt the humiliation seeping through him.

“I said it all, Emma. I admitted it all because there was nothing I wouldn’t have done to reach you. And after he had his laugh, he made me promise on your life that I would never set foot again in the Enchanted Forest.”  

He looked at her, “And I did.” He sighed. “So there you go, Emma. I was banned from my own land because of my own words. When you moved back to New York, I had nothing to look forward to. Not anymore. So I went to see Regina. I only wanted directions to the nearest city and a few pieces of advice and I was ready to go again, to encounter my last adventure: to find a new life or die trying.” He smiled. “Regina offered me this and I just…took it. I don’t know if it’s right or wrong, but I’m content in here. I like the man I’ve become. I have a job and friends. I’ve even tried dating for a while; even if it was not a successful tale.”

He walked towards her, his hand lifting her chin so she would face him, “You don’t get to come here and judge me for it, or for what token I use to remember someone by. Do you want to talk about tokens, Swan? Take a look at this one, love, and tell me what you think.” He said as he stepped away and reached for the collar of his white t-shirt, pulling it down so she could see his left shoulder.

She gasped at the sight of the black swan tattoo in the space between his collarbone and his shoulder.

He looked at her, pain and regret in his eyes, “You don’t get to barge into my apartment for a quick romp with me to take your regrets away. I’ve never wanted that. Moreover _, I don’t deserve that_.”

She looked at him, tears falling from her eyes. He bent down to grab her jacket and sweater from the floor and handed it to her. “I think it’s best if you leave, Swan.”

“I’m sorry, Killian.” She said before leaving his apartment. The moment he closed the door, she collapsed on the hallway, letting the tears flow as pain took over her.

He collapsed on the floor, his head resting on the door, tears running from his eyes, his hand on his left shoulder, where the tattoo was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I'm mean to post this on Valentine's Day. But I couldn't resist.


	15. The Truce

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for your comments! And to Jess and Sandra, my constants for this fic. I hope you like this chapter...

_Every time I see you oh I try to hide away_   
_But when we meet it seems I can't let go_   
_Every time you leave the room I feel I'm fading like a flower_   
**Fading like a flower, Roxette**

Mac knew something had gone bad, really bad, the moment he saw Killian entering the station. He looked defeated, with an air of sorrow and self-loathing surrounding him. He remembered that look very well, as it was the one that Killian had when he first came to town and he carried it for several months, until he slowly came out of it.

Killian looked at him as he headed for his desk, “Don’t even ask, mate.”

“I wasn’t planning to.” Mac replied. “Whatever it was, I’m sure it went far beyond fighting over the last cannoli.” He sighed. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know.” Killian sighed defeated.

Mac acted fast on his feet, “Tell you what, I’ll handle the stakeout today and you can go on the raids. Kick some doors forcefully; let it out of your system. Take one day to figure it out and we’ll take it from there.”

Killian looked thankfully at him. “Thanks, Mac. I appreciate the gesture. I – I’m lucky to have you as my friend.” He said.

“Don’t go all soft on me now, sunshine.” Mac joked. “Let’s go get this bastard.”

Killian smiled at him and then his eyes looked at the end of the room. His expression changed into a pained one before he averted his eyes and looked at his desk. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Emma Swan had walked in, Mac thought as he turned around. She looked even worse than Killian; it was clear that she’d been crying. She smiled softly at him and looked in Killian’s direction, her expression almost regretful.

“Hi…” She said softly.

“Hello, Swan.” Killian replied shortly, not even looking at her.

“So… what is the plan for today?” Emma asked, clearly upset at being ignored by Killian.

Mac was fast on his feet again, “Emma, you’re stuck on stakeout with me today. Killian was asked by the big bosses to conduct the raids, so we are switching places. Don’t worry, I usually don’t bite, I buy my own coffee and you can have all the cannoli. I have more at home.” He finished with a hopeful smile.

“Ok.” Emma said with a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “Let’s go then.”

They made it half way through the room before Emma turned around and called out to Killian.

“Killian…” She said.

He looked at her and saw the worry and fear in her eyes. _Fear for him._

“Be – Be careful today.” She whispered as she held his gaze.

“Aye, I will, Swan. You too.” He replied. _You too, my love._

She smiled and started walking away. Killian exchanged a quick look with Mac, who nodded in comprehension.

_Protect her._   


There isn’t much to do in a stakeout, especially when the other person is completely lost in their inner thoughts. Mac kept mostly silent, letting Emma work out whatever it was that had transpired between her and Killian the day before. Because he had no doubt that her mood today was related directly to Killian. There are only so many things you can masquerade to the world, and Killian and Emma were doing a poor attempt to hide any of their feelings for each other.

But by afternoon, he couldn’t keep to himself anymore. He had, after all, married into a family that was known for being meddlers; and it had rubbed off a little on him. And Killian was his partner, his friend. As happy as he claimed he was, Mac knew that there was a missing piece on the puzzle of Killian’s life: love. It had been missing for a while and Mac now understood why. Whatever had happened or had not happened between Killian and Emma in the past, it was clear to Mac that there was where Killian had left his heart. And he was going to make sure he got it back now. Hopefully in company of the heart of the aforementioned blonde as well.

“I don’t mean to pry…” He started hesitantly, “But I’m sure that things will get better if you talk to him.”

Emma pretended to be confused, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She deflected.

“You know, I can sit here and play dumb if you want.” Mac continued, “But I am a _detective_. I figure stuff out for a living.”

Emma looked at him sheepishly. “There’s nothing to talk about…”

“Yeah, right. He’s doing raids today and letting it all out by kicking doors just because there’s nothing to talk about. And _you_ are sitting here overthinking as well.” Emma gave him a surprised look. “I told you, sweetheart. I read people for a living.” He raised his eyebrows at her and Emma laughed.

“How long have you been Killian’s partner?” She asked.

“Since he moved here, almost three years ago. I – I lost my last partner in a drug bust case that went wrong and Killian took his place. Let’s just say that we bonded over brooding and drinking at the beginning and later we developed a friendship.”

Emma could see that Mac had a true affection for Killian and she wondered when was the last time that Killian had that kind of thing. Someone that cared. She knew Mary Margaret and David cared for him to some extent, but they were her parents; at the end of the day, Emma came first for them. But Mac cared for Killian, unconditionally.

Mac sighed, “Killian is family. It’s the way it is… when you trust someone with your life every day in the direst situations; family is just what they become.”

Slowly, she was beginning to understand the depths of Killian’s new life and how he had been able to weave himself into things he hadn’t had in centuries: a sense of belonging. He had finally found a place he could build his life into, a home. And she’d barged right into it and started poking holes at it.

“He’s happy here, isn’t he?” She asked.

“I think so, yes.” Mac thought it through, “For the most part at least. You never truly know with a guy like Killian. He might wear his heart on his sleeve, but he keeps many things to himself. It’s hard to get him to open up.” Mac noticed Emma’s pensive expression. “Luckily, my wife is _fantastic_ at minding other people’s business, so I can safely admit that he’s doing well here.”

A silent tear escaped Emma’s eye and ran down her cheek.

“Emma,” Mac sighed. “I know it’s _really_ not my place, but whatever happened in the past, or even yesterday, is this how you want things to end between you too? Is this how you want things to be from now on? _Is this how your story ends?_ Life is too short to hold grudges and pain when you can actually talk them through and fix stuff.” Mac offered her a smile. “Just think about it.”

 

When they arrived at the station, Killian was sitting on his deck. He was holding an ice pack to the left side of his face and had a bandage around his right forearm.  Emma ran towards him concerned.

“ _Hook_!” She slipped, saying his moniker in fear without even noticing as she kneeled in front of him.

“I’m fine, love.” He replied without looking at her.

“Let me see,” She said as her hand reached for the ice pack, but he moved away from her. “Killian, please.” She pleaded in a broken whisper.

He sighed and let her grab the ice pack. She cradled his face between her hands, one of them holding the ice pack.  He had a bruise around his eye and a small cut on his lip, but he seemed fine otherwise.

“I trust that the other guy looks worse?” Mac asked.

“Aye… and he’s already been interrogated. We have new information.” Killian replied, but his eyes were fixated on Emma, who was looking at him with worry in her eyes.

“You know, I can make up a lame excuse, but I think I’ll just get out and leave you two alone.” Mac said before turning around and leaving. “I’ll call you later, Killian.”

“Does it hurt?” Emma asked as she ran her fingers over the bruise near his jawline. Her touch was igniting a fire in him he couldn’t resist.

“Only a little.” He replied. “I’ve had worse. You know that.” He tried to smile but ended up wincing.

“Hook…” She said tenderly as she carefully applied the ice package over the side of his face, her fingers slowly caressing him.  He leaned into her touch and closed his eyes, breathing deeply.  

“Emma, about last night…” He started as he opened his eyes and she could see remorse in them.

She silenced him with a finger on his lips.

“Killian, you were right, I had no right to do or say the things I did. I’m sorry, I truly am. Mac said something today that got me thinking…. and the truth is, last night is not how I want things to end between us. I know there’s no going back, but can we at least try to put this behind us and work this case together?  As a team? I want to try.” She looked at him expectantly.

His eyes filled with something that almost resembled hope. “You and I have always made quite a team, lass.”

“Yes, we have.” She smiled.

He looked at her with mischief in his eyes “Are you going to kiss my wounds to make them better?” He flirted with her.

She rolled her eyes and pressed the ice package a little more forcefully and had him wincing… “Don’t push it.”

He smirked at her and she could see all the innuendos that were crossing his mind.

_God, she’d missed him_.

She breathed deeply and looked at him with affection in her eyes. “Killian, I want to thank you. I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t sacrificed everything for me and I want you to know that I- I’m thankful for it.  No one had ever done that for me before…I just didn’t know how to react. I’m not used to owing people.”

“You don’t owe me anything, that’s not why I did it, Emma.” He replied earnestly.

“I know… and I couldn’t handle it. I’m sorry…. Please forgive me.” She gave him a hopeful smile.

_Always_. “It’s fine, Swan. Water under the bridge. I’ve moved on, you’ve moved on. We’re all ok.”

_I haven’t moved on. But I can’t take a chance that I’m wrong about you and you break my heart again._


	16. The Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for your comments and kudos. I hope you like this chapter as well :)

A few weeks into the investigation, things were running smoother. They were making progress, slow but steady. Emma and Killian seemed to have fallen back into their old partnership, both of them working next to the other and almost reading each other’s thoughts on the case. It was familiar and comforting, but also terrifying for Killian to see how easy he was growing accustomed to having Emma by his side again. One day, this case would be over and she’d be gone again. They’d go on living separate lives.

Killian and Mac were reviewing the next day’s planned operation when Mary Margaret walked into the station.

 “Milady.” Killian greeted surprised. “What a lovely surprise.”  

“Hello, Killian.” Mary Margaret said.

“Are you looking for Emma? Because she left at noon, she mentioned she had to pick up Henry and was planning to spend the afternoon with the lad.” Killian asked.

“Oh no, I was actually looking for you.” She smiled her royal _I’m-upto-something_ sweet smile at him. “I wanted to see if you were available to have dinner with us tonight. Emma and Henry are coming… it would be lovely if you could join us.”

Killian swallowed hard. He wasn’t sure how much Mary Margaret and David were aware of what had almost transpired between him and Emma a few weeks ago. Probably not all, considering David had not showed up demanding explanations, but still… he was hesitant.

“I’d love to.” He started smiling. “But I’m afraid I’ve already made plans to have a few drinks with some friends here at the station.” He looked at Mac, who was _clearly_ enjoying this. “Where are my manners, this is my partner Detective Mac Sanders. Mac, this is Mary Margaret Blanchard, she’s….” Killian trailed off trying to figure out what to say. _Emma’s mother_ was definitely not going to fly with this audience.

Mary Margaret was quick to intervene as she pulled her hand out to greet Mac. “I’m Emma’s sister in law. I’m married to her older brother David.” Killian cocked an eyebrow in admiration.

_Good one, Majesty._

“It’s very nice to meet you,” Mac said.

Mary Margaret turned her attention back to Killian, a small sad pout appearing on her fair face, “It’s sad that you cannot join us, Killian. I had such high hopes that you could come.” She looked at Mac with feigned innocence. “We haven’t seen Killian in a while; we were looking forward to catching up.”

Mac looked at her smiling… _oh, I like you, lady._  

“Killian, I’m sure the guys will understand if you blow us off tonight.” Mac said.

Killian looked at him with an intent look and Mac smiled with mocked innocence, “We hang out regularly, it’s really not a big deal. You should go have dinner with your friends.”

Mary Margaret gave them a radiant smile. “Oh, that would be fantastic! Here’s the address, see you around 8, is that ok?” She handed a dumbfounded Killian a piece of paper. “You don’t need to bring anything; it’s all been taken care of.”

“He’ll be there,” Mac promised “He’ll bring something for the coffee time after dinner.”

“Oh, it’s really not necessary.” Mary Margaret beamed.

“Not a problem, my wife’s family owns a bakery; it’s just a phone call.” Mac offered.

“That is settled then. Killian, we’ll see you tonight.” Mary Margaret smiled kindly at him before approaching Mac and shaking his hand, whispering to him. “Thank you very much for this, I truly appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it, ma’am. I think it’ll be good for him to go to that dinner.” Mac smiled at her intently, a silent agreement. _Takes one to know one_.

“A little encouragement never hurt anyone.” Mary Margaret whispered to Mac before leaving.

Killian turned around to look at Mac, “What the bloody hell, mate? Really?!”

“I like her,” Mac said as he grabbed the phone. “Let me call Joey, you need something from the bakery to take to the dinner.”

“I’m not going.” Killian expressed childishly.

“Yes, you are. I already gave my word.”

“I loathe you.”

“No, you don’t. You’ll thank me one day.”

 

“You did WHAT!?” David exclaimed.

“I invited Killian for dinner.” Mary Margaret replied as she busied herself in the kitchen.

“But it’s family night…” David said.

“And Killian is a friend that we haven’t seen in a long time…” Mary Margaret continued. “I’m sure Henry would be delighted to hear some of his stories as a detective.”

“Snow…” David looked at her with his _I-know-you-are-upto-something_ look. “What are you trying to do?”

“What? It’s just dinner!” Mary Margaret replied. “I thought it would be good for Killian and Emma to spend some time together outside the investigation.”

“Why?!?” David asked.

“Charming, really? When was the last time your daughter had a date?” Mary Margaret asked.

“She’s had some dates in these three years.”

Mary Margaret scoffed, “And when was the last time she had a second date with the same guy?” She looked at him pointedly. “Don’t you want her to find someone? To be happy?”

“And you think it’s Hook?” David sighed.

“They are not done with each other, David.” Mary Margaret smiled softly. “Can’t you see it? They are _both_ running away from this.”

“Perhaps there is a reason…” David countered.

“And yet, they found each other in complete different circumstances. _Again._ ” Mary Margaret stated. “ _Of course there is a reason_.”

Mary Margaret’s confident tone started to worry David. “You are not suggesting what I _think_ you are suggesting…”

“Isn’t it _obvious_?” She beamed.

“No, it’s not.” David stated stubbornly.

“Well, it’s not like we have a curse going on to _actually_ prove it, but you know, the signs are there.” She said. “They just haven’t accepted it.”

“And you are going to fix that by shoving him on our daughter’s face?” David asked.

“Some nudges here and there won’t hurt.” She smiled at him.

“You are as subtle as when you hit me with that rock, Snow.” David sighed.

“And you love me for it,” She beamed at him.

 

Emma and Henry joined them shortly. Mary Margaret looked at her with a radiant smile.  Emma didn’t buy it.

“Ok, what it’s going on?”

David sighed, his hand running through his hair as he went to pick up the plates to set up at the table. “Your mother invited Hook for dinner.”

“Cool!” Henry said as he sat down to play with his uncle.

“What?!? You invited Killian?” Emma looked at her mother, an annoyed look on her face.

“I thought it would be a good idea, we haven’t seen him in such a long time…” Mary Margaret trailed off as she busied herself cutting vegetables for the salad, an innocent smile plastered all over her face.

Emma looked at her father raising her eyebrows pointedly. David sighed and shook his head in return. “She already invited him. He’ll be here any minute now… Do you want me to kick him out when he arrives?” David volunteered.

“No, of course not!” Emma said as she ran her hands absentmindedly through her hair, trying to comb it. Mary Margaret noticed and looked pointedly at David, raising her eyebrow.

_I told you._

The bell rang at that very moment, preventing David from replying with a look to his fair princess. David went to open the door and found Killian with a resigned expression, holding a brown package, a bottle of wine and a bag with another wrapped package.

“Hook. Come in,” David attempted a smile that wasn’t quite as cheerful as it should have been, but Killian could not really blame the prince. It was clear they were all victims of Mary Margaret’s plotting in here. And Mac, who had been the perfect sidekick, the meddling git.

“Thank you, mate.” Killian said as he entered, and then looked at David intently, lowering his voice, “I swear I tried to decline, Dave. But your wife can be pretty insistent and unfortunately, she found the perfect accomplice in my partner. I was outnumbered.” He sighed.

“Well, might as well try to have dinner then.” David smiled. “Let me get this from you.” He said and Killian handed him the wine and the package.

Together they entered the apartment, which reminded Killian of the loft they had in Storybrooke. The living room was an open space that merged into the kitchen, where Mary Margaret and Emma were finishing putting together dinner. Emma turned around and smiled shyly at him and suddenly, he forgot about everything. It was as if time had not passed, as if those three years had never happened and they were in her parent’s flat in Storybrooke, plotting on how to defeat Zelena. Mary Margaret’s voice brought him out of his daze.

“Killian, thank you so much for coming!” She smiled kindly at him. “You shouldn’t have bothered to bring anything.”

“Oh, it was nothing, really. I didn’t move a finger.” He smiled and bowed at Mary Margaret.

Emma looked at the package, “More cannoli?” She asked raising an eyebrow.

“Alas, no,” He sighed sadly, “They’d run out of those. We’ll have to do with sfogliatelle instead.”

“Do I even want to ask _how_ _you know how to pronounce that_?” Emma asked in a flirtatious tone.

“A tale for another day, perhaps.” Killian deflected as he turned to Mary Margaret again. “This is for the little lad.” He gave her the bag he was still holding in his hand. “It’s a gift, but I presume you’d want to avoid giving it to him so close to bedtime…”

“Oh goodness, yes, otherwise he’d get riled up and it will be impossible to get him to sleep.” Mary Margaret commented, a grateful look in her eyes. “How thoughtful of you, Killian.”

“It’s nothing,” He shrugged.

“How do you know about toddlers getting overexcited before bedtime!?” David asked intrigued.

“My partner’s youngest was a toddler when I moved here. I’ve heard all about how to get a kid to sleep in the evening.” Killian replied easily. He turned around and looked at Henry playing with the lad. “He looks just like you, mate.” He said to David.

“Yes, he does.” David smiled proudly. “Thank you for the gift, Killian.”

“Don’t thank me until you open it.” Killian joked.

“What exactly did you buy him?” David asked concerned.

“A pirate ship, naturally.” Killian smirked at David. 

“Ok, everyone, please sit for dinner while I take our little prince to bed” Mary Margaret announced. “Killian, you sit next to Emma.” Mary Margaret smiled innocently at him and Killian cocked an eyebrow at Emma.

“Your mother is not known for her subtlety.” He whispered in Emma’s ear as he sat next to her.

“She’s the fairest of them all, not the subtlest of them all.” Emma replied and Killian laughed sincerely.

She couldn’t remember when was the last time she’d heard him laugh like that.

_God, she’d missed his laugh._

Dinner ran smoothly, as they all fell in a pattern of conversation of their current lives. Killian entertained them with some stories about his police work while Henry kept asking questions. At some point, without even realizing it, he leaned back in the chair, his arm resting on Emma’s chair.  Mary Margaret’s smile and David’s look made him realize of this and he quickly removed his arm. After coffee, Mary Margaret was talking animatedly with Emma and Henry and Killian was watching them when David stood next to him.

“He’s a good lad.” Killian said, smiling softly. “Reminds me of his father when he was the same age.” He ran his hand through his hair. “It’s not easy growing up without a father.” He whispered painfully.

“It’s not.” David acknowledged. “But he’s doing pretty well… Robin and I try to be there for him.”

“He has a prince and a thief looking out for him, that’s not so bad.” Killian replied.

“We’ve been able to avoid any more flying monkeys, luckily.” David joked and Killian chuckled. “Tell me something, Hook,” David asked, “Are we adding a pirate to the mix?” He looked at Killian intently.

“I’m no longer a pirate, mate. I’m a police detective.” Killian replied standing proudly.

“That doesn’t answer my question, Killian.” David stated.

“Aye, it does not.” Killian sighed and averted his eyes to the floor, struggling with himself. He finally looked up at David, a resigned look in his eyes. “Your daughter made her intentions clear to me three years ago. I have no intention to go on that path again. I’ve moved on.”

David didn’t believe that last line for a second, but he thought better not to keep pushing. He had another more important topic to address.

“This case you are working… that guy is really dangerous, right?” David asked.

“Aye, a bloody psychopath.” Killian replied.

“I trust that you’ll protect my daughter from any harm.” David said. It was not a question or a plea. It was a vote of confidence, of trust. David knew it was like that, that it had always been like that.

Killian looked at him, honesty in his eyes, “With my life. That hasn’t changed, mate. It never will.”


	17. Bowling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter. As always, all the love in the world to Jess and Sandra.

Killian started to notice that Emma Swan was not only immersing herself in his investigation, but she was also weaving herself into his entire life. She spent several hours in the station and in addition of a budding friendship with Mac, she had also become close with some of the other officers.

It should not have come as a surprise when he was informed by Mac that she’d been invited to their monthly bowling league night.

“You WHAT?” Killian asked.

“We’re one player short; Bobby busted his wrist on the last raid. So we all voted and chose her.”

“I didn’t vote.” Killian cocked his eyebrow at him.

“Oh come on, don’t tell me you have a problem with her coming to bowling night?”

“Really, mate?!?”

“You’ll thank me one day,” Mac stated.

“No, I will not.” Killian replied.

 

Emma entered the bowling alley and looked for Killian. When she spotted him, she almost died at the sight of him in jeans, black bowling shoes and a black bowling shirt with two red stripes. She approached him with a huge grin on her face and then she noticed that the shirt _even had his name on it_.

His look was as menacing as when they were fighting lost boys. “Don’t say a word, Swan.” He threatened.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” She said. “I’ll just take pictures instead.”

He invaded her personal space, as he did so many times in the past, his face lowering as he spoke in her ear, “You do remember that I’m a dangerous, _vengeful_ pirate, love?”

She looked at him with her green eyes full of determination, “Are you going to lock me up in a cell again? Or handcuff me somewhere?” She said seductively as she headed to the table where the rest of Killian’s colleagues were sitting. She stopped to turn her head around, a flashing smile on her face, “Coming, pirate?” She asked in a velvety voice.  

“Aye, milady.” He replied mischievously before following her. A little bit later, they were sitting next to each other, beers in their hands.

“I have to confess…” She said in a whispered tone. “It’s hard to picture Captain Hook _bowling._ ”

He chuckled and took a sip of his beer, “I know… But it was an important thing at the station and it’s actually something I _can_ do with one hand.” He replied honestly. “I’ve tried, but I’m not much into sports. I don’t see the point in most of them, to be honest. But this, it’s kind of entertaining in its own way. And I get to spend time with the other officers.”

“Are you any good?” She asked.

“You’ll see right away, princess.” He smirked as he got up and headed to the lanes.

It turned out he was a decent player after all, Emma thought. This was completely her opposite, as she was terrible at bowling. At some point, Killian just took the ball from her hands and spoke to her in a commanding tone.

“Just go sit down and drink your beer, Swan. You are dooming us, darling.”

“So much for being the savior.” She teased and he grinned at her, placing his hand on her lower back as he accompanied her to the table where the rest of his female coworkers were.  

“Sit here and let me handle this one, love.” He looked at her with mischief in his eyes, biting his lower lip.

_God, she’d missed his flirting._

“Well,” Emma said sighing to Killian’s colleagues. “It seems I’ve been banned from the lane.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it.” One of them, a brunette, said in a chipper tone. “We really cannot care less about the score. We just come here to admire Jones in all his glory.”

“And tight jeans.” Another added.

Emma struggled with the jealousy that was slowly creeping on her. “Jones, uh? You think he’s that attractive?” She asked nonchalantly.

“Oh yes. Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.” They looked at her. Emma shrugged. “Well, I suppose he’s kind of cute.” She lied through her teeth and took a huge gulp of her beer; letting them carry on with the conversation and hoping she didn’t have to add anything else. She knew exactly how Hook looked, she just felt weird discussing it with other women.

“He goes beyond cute. That man is impossibly good looking. You should see him on Hallowen. He dresses like a pirate, complete with a long leather coat, rings and guyliner. He actually gets a brace and a hook. It’s the most sinful thing you’ve ever seen. It should be illegal.” Emma couldn’t help but smile at that comment. She knew _exactly_ how illegal that look was. First hand.

“Whoever is doing him is a lucky woman.” Emma choked at those words. _Was he doing anyone?!?_

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen him with anyone in a long time.”

“A guy as hot like that, there’s no way he’s not getting any. Look at him! I’m going to faint any minute…”

“Imagine being the one that gets to keep him. Oh… how we hated Rebecca in the beginning.” Emma’s interest peaked as she heard the other women speaking of Killian’s ex. Although she hated to admit it, she had often wondered what Rebecca was like.  

“Yeah, but she made him happy… I still don’t know why they broke up. They were so cute together.”

“Mac thinks he’s not over someone. From before he came here… He thinks he was in love and got his heart broken.”

Emma’s heart stopped at those words. His heart broken. Killian had had his heart broken and she knew exactly who’d done it.

“Who would reject someone like Killian? You had to be crazy. He’s not just hot; he’s actually a decent guy.  Remember how he treated Rebecca? Like she was a princess, like she was the only woman that existed…”

“Like he would go to the end of the world for her…” Emma whispered, unable to contain her sadness and jealousy. She realized that she’d said the words out loud and she smiled awkwardly, “I imagined based on what you were saying.” She trailed off and looked at Killian standing by the bowling lane, laughing with his friends.

_You had that. And you let him go._

Shortly after that, Emma was standing by the counter getting another drink, when she felt a familiar voice whispering in her ear, “Are you having a nice evening, Swan?”

She turned around and found Killian smirking at her, “It’s ok, I guess. I could think of a few more _enjoyable activities_ , though.”

Killian cocked an eyebrow at her, his eyes darkening, “Really? And what would you have in mind, love?”

Just when she was about to reply, she heard a female voice coming from behind Killian.

“Killian?”

Killian’s face changed from smirking into a complete and utter painful shock. He turned around and Emma saw a brunette standing in front of him. She seemed familiar.

“Rebecca?” Killian asked and Emma’s heart stopped for a second.

_Son of a bitch_.

She was breathtaking, she could see that. And she was looking at Killian with an apologetic smile.

Killian stared, shocked, at Rebecca. Of all the nights he could’ve run into her, of course it’d be today. He silently cursed himself and tried to smile.

“Hi…” He said in a soft voice. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine.” Rebecca replied with a soft smile on her lips. “I’m really sorry, I forgot today was bowling night… otherwise I wouldn’t have come.” She said biting her lower lip in an apologetic gesture.

“Don’t worry about it, love. It’s a free country after all.” Killian smiled softly at her and noticed Rebecca shifting her gaze behind him. He turned around to find a very uncomfortable Emma watching them.

_Bloody Hell._

“Rebecca, this is Emma. She’s working with us on a case.” He said shortly. “Emma, this is Rebecca.” Emma waved her hand and Rebecca nodded her head. Killian wanted to crawl behind the bar.

“Well, I should get back to my friends.” Rebecca smiled and he could see the hidden pain behind her eyes. “It was good seeing you, Killian.”

“Aye, you too.” He replied before watching her walk away towards her friends. He sighed deeply, running his hand through his hair, feeling the guilt already flooding him.

 

Four. Four shots of rum.  Killian had washed down four shots of rum in between beers in the last half hour. Emma knew because she had counted them as she sat next to him in silence, waiting for him to say something. The moment Rebecca had walked back towards her table, he sighed deeply and sat down in the bar and ordered his first drink. Now it was four down, and one more in his hand. She cleared her throat and he looked at her, pain and regret in his eyes.

“I’m afraid I’m not much good company, Swan.” He sighed. “You must forgive my rudeness… it’s been an unexpected turn of events.” He said as he looked in the direction of Rebecca’s table.

Emma knew she shouldn’t ask; it was truly none of her business. But she _had to know_.

“How long were you with her?” She asked.

“A little over six months. I’d been here for a couple of months and I’d only hung out with Mac and some guys from the station. We were out having some drinks one night and she was sitting at the counter. Mac dared me to hit on her. You know me; I’ve always loved a challenge.” He smirked sadly.  “So I went there and offered to buy her a drink with all the intention of hitting on her, perhaps lure her into my bed and never see her again. Somehow, between the first and the second beer, we started talking and I walked out of that bar only with her phone number. It took me two days to call her and ask her to lunch. After that, things just happened: I enjoyed spending time with her; she liked spending time with me. Before I realized it; I was in a relationship. Why wouldn’t I be in one? She was fun, beautiful, she made me laugh, and she wanted me. She didn’t run away from her emotions and she didn’t run away from me.”

“Wow… she sounds perfect.” Emma stated without helping but feel hurt and betrayed.

“She was. She _is_. Just not perfect for me.” He sighed, running his hand through his hair one more time. “And I knew it… part of me always knew that I wasn’t in love with her. I cared deeply for her and I really tried to love her, but I couldn’t. So I had to let her go…. It was hard to do, because she made me happy, happier that I’ve been in centuries, but I couldn’t do that to her. I cared too much about her to let her believe in a lie. She deserved better.”

“I’m sorry, Killian. I really am.” It was all that Emma could offer him.

“You know, this is the part where I am a gentleman and say _It’s OK, Swan, this had nothing to do with you_ …” He looked at her with his intense blue eyes, “But you and I both know, _it’d be a lie_.” He finished as he drowned his shot.

Emma looked at him and fell silent.

He sighed again. “Ok, this is my cue. I’ve drunk too much and I’ve already started to confess things that not only will I regret in the morning, but that will earn me a nice push back from you. Actually, it’s a bloody miracle you haven’t left yet. You did hear me admit that I broke up with her because I was still in love with you, right?”

“Killian…” Her heart broke for him.

“Why are you still here, Swan? That was your cue, this is the part where you tell me that it’s not that simple, that is not what it seems, that you don’t exactly feel the same way, that you are not in the mood, that you cannot take a chance that you’re wrong about me or some sort of magnificent excuse to walk away from me when I’m baring my heart and soul to you. So tell me, darling, why aren’t you walking away?”

“Kilian, I’m sorry, I-” She tried to explain but her cut her off.

“If you were going to actually stay and have this conversation, why couldn’t you do it three years ago? _Before_ you broke my heart?”

“I’m here now, Killian. I know that it can’t be easy for us to talk about it, but I’m willing to try…”

“That’s the funny part, Swan. I’m not in the mood.” He put some money on the counter and stood up. “I’m going home. Mac or one of the guys will escort you to your car or if you don’t feel like driving, just let Mac know and he’ll have a patrol give you a ride. Get home safely.” He finished and walked away from her.

He found Mac by the bowling lanes. “Mac, I’m getting a taxi and going home. I’m done for the night. Please make sure Emma gets home safely.” He said.

“Killian, what happened?”

“I ran into Rebecca.” Killian sighed. “I don’t want to get into this right now, Mac. Just make sure she gets home safely.”

“I will. See you tomorrow, Killian.”

He knew he should have stayed. Emma Swan was finally willing to actually stay in a conversation about _feelings_. But he couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t open up to her again and risk getting his heart broken. _He’d never come back from it._  


	18. The Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for all your comments. I hope you like this chapter as well.  
> As usual, all the love for Jess and Sandra :)

_Desperation is a tender trap_   
_It gets you every time_   
_You put your lips to her lips_   
_To stop the lie_   
**So cruel, U2**

Killian woke up to a terrible headache and the ghost of a hangover, painful reminders of why he’d cut down the rum in the first place after leaving Storybrooke. He groaned as he got up from his bed and got dressed. He grabbed his coffee and headed to the station. Last night had been a revelation and he knew exactly what he had to do.

He found Mac already sitting on his desk.

“Bad hangover?” Mac asked him.

“Awful.” Killian replied. “Can I talk to you in private?” He headed to the office nearby and Mac followed him, closing the door.

“What is it?” Mac asked intrigued.

“Do you remember the girl Laura wanted to set me up with?” Killian asked and Mac nodded, a little confused. “Do you still have her number?”

“What? You want her number?” Mac asked surprised.

“Yes.” Killian replied shortly.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why? To ask her out on a date, of course.” Killian looked at Mac with innocent eyes.

“Killian what the hell are you trying to do?”

“What do you mean what I’m trying to do? Going out. You are the one that keeps telling me I have to date again…” Killian stated matter-of-factly.

“And your first choice is a strange girl you’ve never met and that I have been trying to set you up for weeks and you’ve just refused over and over?” Mac was starting to get really pissed off.

“What other choices you suggest I have?” Killian said trying to play the innocent part.

Mac lifted his arms in frustration and pointed to the glass door in the office, directly to Emma who’d just walked in and was talking animatedly with one of the officers outside.

“Killian, mate, we share a locker room. Do you want me to _pretend_ I never saw your shoulder tattoo? Or play dumb to the fact that is a _swan_? Why would you even want to go out on a date with someone else? She’s standing _right there._ Ask _her_ out _._ ”

“That won’t bloody happen, Mac. I’ve told you. This is strictly professional.” Killian sneered. “Now, are you going to give me that phone number or not?”

“I will not. Ask Emma out, Killian.” Mac said as he turned around and started to open the door. “You’ll thank me on--” His words were cut off when Killian forcefully closed the door, facing him with anger and pain in his eyes.

“No, I will bloody not, Mac. I’ve been on this path before, mate. This _can_ and _will_ end badly. _For me._ ” Killian sighed and walk around the office like a caged animal. When he finally stood up and faced his partner, he was a complete wreck.

“She’s never going to love me, mate. She didn’t three years ago and she won’t love me now. We’d finish this case and she’d put all her walls back up, give me magnificent excuse and run away.”

Mac looked at him with sadness and empathy. Killian sighed and run his head through his hair.

“I can’t do this again. She’ll break my heart once more and I won’t be able to pick the pieces like I did last time.”

“You don’t know that, mate. It might be different this time.” Mac tried to offer his partner hope.

“I don’t have the strength to find out…” Killian admitted.

“I never pictured you as a coward, mate.”

_A man unwilling to fight for what he wants, deserves what he gets…. But you fought for her. And you lost._

Killian smiled sadly, “There’s a difference between cowardice and self preservation, Mac.” He looked at Mac intently, “Now, are you going to get me that phone number or should I call Laura myself?”

Mac sighed, realizing he was not going to change Killian’s mind. “I think you’re making a terrible mistake, Killian. But it’s yours to make. I’ll call Laura and get that number for you.”  

Killian left the office, hastily grabbed his jacket and headed to the door, trying to avoid Emma.

She approached him anyway, a small hopeful smile in her eyes, “Hey, Killian.”

“Can’t talk now, love. I’ve got business to attend.” He replied shortly and left the station.

 

He found Emma waiting for him when he got back, and he sighed deeply.

“Hey,” She greeted him smiling.

“Hello, Swan. I thought you’d left by now.” He said as he headed towards his desk.

“I was waiting for you.” She said and he looked at her confused for a moment.

“Is everything alright?” He asked concerned.

“Yes, everything is ok. I was just wondering…” She trailed off, nervous. “Do you want to go get a drink?” She asked looking shyly at him with her beautiful green eyes.

_Bloody hell._

“Sorry, can’t do it tonight, Swan, I have a date.” He smiled falsely at her.

“A date?!?” She choked on the words.

“Yes, an evening out with a fair lass. You know how these things work, right?” He replied nonchalantly, his smug pirate mask up again, not letting her see anything else.

“I thought you weren’t dating.” She said in a disapproving tone.

“Why wouldn’t I? I’m quite the catch, apparently.” He smirked at her, raising his eyebrows and biting his lower lip. “Besides, you don’t expect me to be alone, do you? I have certain needs…”

“Needs?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“You don’t have needs, Swan? Are you telling me you’ve been celibate these three years?” He asked her in a reproaching tone, his eyes surveying her.

“That’s none of your business.” She deflected.

“Neither is my love life and whether or not I go out on a date.” He pointed out to her in a demanding tone.

“Well, sorry to waste your time. Have fun on your date.” She replied angrily as she stood up to leave. _You lost him._

“Oh, I will. And so will she. I’ll make sure of it.” He finished almost to himself.

He didn’t have fun. He couldn’t get Emma out of his thoughts for the entire evening. Even when he kissed that poor girl in a desperate attempt to forget Emma, his thoughts took him directly to her lips on his in Neverland. Her lips on his only a few weeks ago in his apartment. His mind was full with thoughts of her. So he apologized, faced the ugly truth of being a terrible date and left.

He walked back to his car so lost in his thoughts of Emma that he didn’t realize the dark figure that followed him throughout the night.


	19. The Great Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for your comments and kudos. And as always, all the love for Jess and Sandra!

_You don't know if it's fear or desire_   
_Danger the drug that takes you higher_   
_Head in heaven, fingers in the mire_

_Her heart is racing, you can't keep up_   
_The night is bleeding like a cut_   
_Between the horses of love and lust_   
_We are trampled underfoot  
_ **So cruel, U2**

Killian noticed something wrong with his apartment door the moment he walked into his corridor. Someone had picked his lock.  He reached for the door and in a swift motion opened it, reaching immediately for his gun behind his waist and entering his apartment.

He almost chocked at the sight of Emma standing in the middle of his living room.

“What the bloody hell, Swan!?!  _I could have shot you!_ ” He shouted in absolute rage as he lowered his gun and put in on a side table.

“So… how was your date?” She asked nonchalantly.

“ _My date?_ _You broke into my apartment to ask about my date_?” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He took a few deep breaths to calm down.

“Did she take care of your needs?” Emma continued with her interrogation scornfully.

He cocked an eyebrow at her, “My needs?” He could sense she was up to something and he decided to go along with it. If she wanted to play with fire, he’d make sure she’d burn. She might be the love of his bloody life, but he had three hundred years of experience over her at playing games. He would not be bested by her. _Not in this_.

He smirked at her, “Oh yes, I’m quite sated, Swan.” He swayed his hips almost imperceptibly, biting his lower lip and looking at her with a daring expression.  

“You are lying” She stated, her green eyes burning with fire.

“Is that so?” He whispered as he saw her approaching him, her eyes never leaving his. “And how would you know? Is that your superpower talking to you again, _love_?” He stressed the last work, his tongue playing wickedly against his teeth.

“Yes.” She replied but he saw her eyes flicker for just a second. _Open book, Swan._

“And who’s lying now, darling?” He said cockily and he tilted his head, giving her a devilish look, “Did you follow me around, Swan?”

She was facing him now and he could see it in her eyes: Passion. Rage. Lust. She looked at him and he almost caved with how much he truly wanted her at that moment.

“What if I did?” She lifted her chin defiantly.

He looked at her triumphantly, “Are you _jealous_ , Swan?”

“Of that? Her? Please…” She scoffed, rolling her eyes and looking positively insulted. She meant to move away but he caught her wrist, bringing her closer to him, his eyes leveling with hers. She could see the thrill in his look.  

“Then tell me, _why are you here_?” He whispered to her, his voice low and lustful.

“Because I know you, _pirate_.” She stretched the last word almost as an insult. He didn’t even flinch. “You can play games all you want, _Hook_. You can get a new life, a new job, a new date. You can even pretend you wanted to kiss her at the end of the night, you might even mean it.” She looked at him, eyes as cold as the winter, there were no tender emotions, there were no deep feelings. This was anger, contempt, lust.  

“I feel there is an objection coming in your statement, Swan.” He replied cockily, his devilish smirk plastered in his face, his mask as up as her walls.

“You’re still a pirate; and a pirate always covets a treasure.” She raised her hand and started running it through his chest, her fingers dancing on his shirt, the ghost of a caress.  “Something they desperately want and they would do anything to get their hands on, to claim, to possess.” Her fingers ghosted over his chest, playing with the charms on his necklace. He inhaled deeply and she smirked with the known satisfaction of the effect she had on him.

“You seem to know the nature of a pirate very well, Swan.” He whispered as his hand move from her wrist to play with a lock of her hair, his finger almost touching her long neck. It was her turn to shiver now… and he enjoyed every elated second of it.  “But I fail to see what this has to do with my dalliance tonight.”

“Because you and I both know,” She whispered into his chest, as her fingers moved to his left shoulder, “The only treasure you’ve coveted for a while, is _me._ ” She lifted her face and looked at him, her fingers pressed lightly where his swan tattoo was, a triumphant smirk on her face.

He looked at her, desire pooling in his eyes and she got even closer to him, step by step, forcing him backwards, cornering him against the wall. And then she spoke again, her voice a velvety whisper.

“Let’s face it, Hook, the only one you want to take, to possess, is _me_.” She rolled the last word out of her mouth, her tongue swirling almost lasciviously at him.

“Full of yourself, aren’t you, Swan?” He cocked an eyebrow at her, his blue eyes challenging her to continue.

“Look me in the eye and tell me it wasn’t me you were thinking of when you kissed her.” She whispered looking at him, her breath hovering on his face, his neck. “ _Any of them_. All of the girls you took to your bed these years, _tell me it wasn’t me who you desired in your bed_.”

He grabbed her suddenly, his arm circling her waist, pulling her to him. He swirled them around, capturing her against the wall, his body fully pressed against hers. She gasped at the change in the scenario and he welcomed the feeling of his body against hers.

“Two can play this game, love.” He said as he looked at her with an intense gaze. “Tell me you haven’t thought about it all those nights alone, or even with the random strangers you might have picked for the night,” He whispered in her face, his lips hovering over hers, making her dizzy with lust,  “Tell me it was not me you thought of, you fantasized with.” He ran his hand up her thigh and rested it on her hip, grabbing it and pushing her hips against his, his lips moving to speak in her ear, “Of my hand and my lips all over you. Of me taking you and making you tremble in my arms. Of me making you come over and over again.” He felt her whimper and shake against him and it drove him insane with desire. But he kept control of himself, he looked at her and his eyes were as black as the night, “Tonight, when you saw me kissing her, _tell me you didn’t wish it was you_.”

“Killian…” She pleaded in a ghosted whisper, her eyes looking at him with a surrendered desire.

_“Tell me.”_ He commanded.

“I wish it was me…” She conceded finally, her eyes flickering to his lips.

“As you wish, love.” He said as he crushed his lips into hers, his fingers intertwining in her hair and pulling her closer to him, deepening the kiss. He heard her moan and his chest growled in satisfaction. He broke the kiss and trailed his mouth to her jawline, her throat, her neck, her collarbone. His hand caressed her thigh again and he lifted her leg, locking it to his waist. She moaned again and ground her hips against his, seeking the friction and he groaned at the feeling. He rested his forehead on her shoulder, taking a moment to catch his breath. He needed to know, he needed to be sure.   

He lifted his head and looked directly at her, finding the same desire in her eyes that was consuming him.

“Are you sure, Emma?  Are you _absolutely_ sure?” He asked in a lustful, shaky voice, his eyes boring into hers.

“Yes,” She replied looking straight at him.

He pulled away from her, “Bedroom.” He said breathlessly as he took her hand and walked with her towards his bedroom.  “I won’t take you against the wall like a commoner. This might be only lust, Swan, but it’s still _you_.” He said as he turned around and pounced into her with such passion that almost knocked her off her feet.

They stumbled towards the bedroom, their shirts quickly discarded. Her hands rubbed against his chest and stomach, feeling his toned muscles underneath her fingertips. It sent shivers down her spine and it made him want her even more.

He pulled away hesitantly for a second, his eyes going to his prosthetic hand, pondering what to do. She seemed to catch his hesitation and smiled at him, slowly caressing his arm. “It’s fine either way…” She whispered as her hand ran over his bicep. He breathed deeply, stepping back to remove his brace and hand from his forearm and put them on his bedside table. He looked at her and his vulnerability shattered her. She slowly approached him again, and bent down to kiss his forearm, his bicep, his shoulder, stopping to lay one final kiss next to his swan tattoo.

When she looked at him, there were words to describe the feelings in his eyes. “Come here…” He whispered before kissing her again slowly, savoring each moment of her lips moving against his. When they deepened the kiss, passion overtook them again. Soon their remaining clothes were discarded and he directed them to the bed, playfully tossing her on it and laying on top, his body pressed against hers.

A thought ran through her head as he started to attack her neck. “Wait…” She whispered breathlessly and he stopped to look at her. “I – we need pro---” She started but he cut her off smirking.

“Top drawer.” He said breathlessly and she looked at him. He smiled softly, “I wasn’t celibate these three years, Swan.” She looked between shocked and regretful and he whispered against her lips. “And neither were you, so don’t act so shocked.”

He gave her a long, searing kiss before pulling away and looking at her, his eyes full with desire, “I’m going to need a hand with those, love.” He smirked at her, and she could see a hint of embarrassment in his eyes.

“I’ll take care of it…” She whispered in a lascivious tone and he could feel himself needing her even more.

It was like climbing that beanstalk again. It was him bandaging her hand and tying the scarf with his mouth. It was her leaving him chained to the top of that beanstalk. It was all the times she walked away from him. And the times he took revenge on that.

They’d claim it wasn’t love. It was need, desperation. It was raw passion, their lust for each other burning them to the very core. It was a game on who bested whom more times, as they always did. It was his desire to finally move on and leave her behind. It was her determination not to be forgotten. It was his need to have her, as he’d possessed every single treasure he had coveted. It was her need to claim him, to brand him as hers so he could never be claimed by anyone. After they collapsed into each other, he pulled her tighter to him, his arm claiming her as his, _only his_ , his nose buried in her hair, nuzzling her neck. She snuggled closer, letting herself be claimed by him, pleased on the satisfaction that he was still hers, _only hers_. And that is how they fell asleep, in each other’s arms.

It wasn’t clear who woke up first in the middle of the night, who reached out for the first tender kiss, who replied with a soft kiss of its own. But soon his hand was everywhere, caressing her softly, covering her with lingering kisses, holding her close to him. She replied with soft kisses of her own, her hands exploring every scar, every mark, and every part of his body. They rocked gently, pressed to each other, close to each other, almost in silence, running deep on their emotions. She could still feel it, his devotion, that devotion he only had for her. And it broke her apart.

When he pulled her to him one more time and nested her to sleep, she finally allowed herself to hope.

When he felt her nested against him, he allowed himself to elate on the feeling, knowing it wouldn’t last. She’d be gone before morning, running away like she always did. And he wouldn’t have to deal with the aftermath of this. He wouldn’t have to ponder what this meant, or if he even wanted it to mean something. He wouldn’t have to think on how this jeopardized everything he’d worked so hard to achieve in the past three years.

Because she’d run away from this, she’d put her walls back up and pretend it never happened.

And for once, he was counting on it.


	20. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As usual, shoutout Jess for being a rockstar and reviewing this in record time while doing her own coursework. And to Sandra for the constant support!

_Oh...love...you say in love there are no rules_  
 _Oh...love...sweetheart..._  
 _You're so cruel_  
 _Oh...love...to stay with you I'd be a fool_  
 _Sweetheart...you're so cruel_  
**So cruel, U2**

He drifted awake slowly, expecting his bed to be empty, but then he felt her body still snuggled against his. She hadn’t left.

_Bloody hell._

Panic arose in him. He wasn’t ready to deal with this. He definitely was not ready to deal with a _morning after_ with Emma Swan, especially after the little mind game they had going on the night before. He could only picture how a talk like that would go.

_He would get his heart broken again._

He had to think this through. He had to stay ahead of the game again.

_It was the only way he’d survive._

He sighed, got out of the bed carefully to avoid waking her and headed to his shower.

 

Emma heard noises in the kitchen and opened her eyes. It took her just a minute to remember the events of the prior night and she felt a slight twinge of guilt at how it all had gone. She’d also felt sad that Killian had left the bed instead of staying in, but she tried not to read much into it. She got up, quickly got dressed and headed for the kitchen.

He was facing the counter, his back to her, drinking coffee. He was already dressed and his hair was damp.

“Hey…” She whispered awkwardly.

He turned around and gave her a small smile that did not reach his eyes.

“Good morning, Swan. There’s coffee if you want some.” He said in a detached tone.

Emma’s heart stopped for a second. _Something isn’t right._

She cleared her throat. “Last night was…” She started but he cut her off.

“A one-time thing.” He stated coldly.

She looked at him shocked, with a puzzled expression. He felt the guilt creeping through him, but he had to go on. “Actually, it was a two time thing, but you get the point…” He finished smugly.

If she were closer, she would have slapped him. He could tell from the look on her face.

“Killian…” She started to walk towards him.

“It was a mistake, Swan.” He continued. “You and I both know it…”

She looked at him in disbelief, her green eyes piercing his and he almost caved with the need of holding her in his arms again.

“Emma…” He sighed. “Whatever it was, love, it wasn’t a good idea. We’re in the middle of a case…”  

“The case? You’re using the case as your excuse?” She asked in disbelief.

“It’s not an excuse. I’ve been working on this for months, even years, Emma. I cannot get distracted when we are so close to finally finding this psychopath and putting him behind bars.” He stated avoiding her eyes.

“A distraction?” She couldn’t believe how cold he was, how detached and distant he sounded. She knew all these lines; she had delivered them so many times. _He sounded like her._

“A very nice and compliant one, don’t misunderstand me.  Some might complain about the screaming, but I found that very alluring…” He said cockily.

He wasn’t surprised when she slapped him. He deserved it. He tilted his head and clenched his jaw.

“What do you want from me, Swan?” He asked in a low voice.

“Talk to me, Hook.” She said. “You cannot pretend this didn’t happen…”

“Actually, I never thought I would _have to_ talk to you about this. I was pretty sure you would be gone before I even opened my eyes.” He said with a reproaching tone in his eyes. “After all, you’ve _always_ run away from me, why would that change?”

The pain hidden in his tone was almost unbearable and it brought tears to her eyes.

“I’m here now…” She said determined.

“It’s too late, Swan.” He sighed. “I’m not interested.” He said as he walked past her and headed to the living room.

“Liar!” She called on him as she turned around.

He stopped and turned around to look at her and she could see the hurt in his eyes. “What do you want from me, Swan?” He started in a tone full of hurt and regret. “Do you want me to crawl back to you and profess my undying love? To beg you for a chance to have a happy ending? _I did all that, love_. And you said no.”

 “So you are just going to shut down and never take a chance again?” She asked in almost a whisper, her heart breaking.

“Look out for yourself and you’ll never get hurt, remember?” He smiled sadly. “I _asked_ you to be part of something, Emma. And you chose to walk away. I asked you to try. _Just try, just a chance_. And you couldn’t even give me that. You pushed me away.”

His accusatory tone was breaking her resolve and her heart and the words slipped from her before she could control them.

“You were supposed to come back!” She yelled, remorse and hurt in her voice.

Pain and resentment flickered through his eyes and he started walking towards her.

“How many more times should I have kept enduring rejection after rejection and keep coming back? How many more times until I proved that I was worthy of you?” He spat at her, his controlled voice feeling like a knife cutting through her. He could see it, but he couldn’t stop. “You were never going to stop pushing me away, Emma. _Never_.” He finished.

“You don’t know that…” She said weakly. “You promised to win my heart, and gave up when it got tough. You just left. Like all of them.” She finished in an accusatory whisper.

“There is a fine line between devotion and obsession. I felt I had crossed it.  It was enough, Swan. _It should have been enough._ ” He retorted in a low voice.

She looked at him and he could still see the lost girl he first met… and it broke his heart. But there was no understanding in her eyes. She still couldn’t see _him_.

“You know, lass? You are not the only one who’s been hurt and abandoned, who never thought they were enough.” His voice was low, almost a whisper… carrying the pain of centuries of neglect.  “You are not the only one who needed to know that someone was there for them, unconditionally. You were not the only who needed someone to come back for them…” His blue eyes were bearing his soul and she could see the pain and loneliness in them.

“I saved your life.” She said in a small plea.

“Aye, you did. You saved my life, stripping yourself from your magic. Because that is what heroes do… they save the day. But you did not care enough to actually stay and _be with me_.” His eyes bore into hers.

“I cared about you, Killian.”

“Did you care? Really, Swan? Then tell me lass, how many times did you try to find me in these three years?” He retorted, looking defiantly at her.

She froze on the spot, her eyes shocked as his words sank in. He could see her eyes dawning with realization as her face started to blush. And that was his answer. That was all he needed to know.

“How long it took you to find me when you _actually started looking_? I never hid, Emma. You could have found me a long time ago.  But you never looked for me before, Swan. You didn’t care.” He said sadly, his hand running through his hair.  “The only reason you are here it’s because I bumped into you and I’m conveniently working on an investigation you are interested in. If you’d caught Thomas that day, you wouldn’t even be here. After we catch Thomas, _you won’t be here_. Some part of you is still running away. And I won’t follow you this time. I’ve worked too hard to move on. I won’t jeopardize the life I’ve built to run after you.”

He looked at her, pain and determination in his eyes. “I’ve got a raid to get to. Just do whatever you need to do and lock the door when you leave. I’ll see you in the station later this afternoon.” He turned around, grabbed his jacket and left his apartment.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come talk to me on tumblr (lenfaz). I'm starting a series of drabbles to celebrate a follower milestone and there will be one-shots in the Separate Lives verse.


	21. The Interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As usual, all the love for Jess and Sandra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I have to be honest here. This is one of my favorite chapters: it has some of my favorite lines, my favorite scenes and the last scene is truly one of visual images I have for this fic. If some talented person ever wants to draw something in this verse, it would be the final scene of this chapter.   
> A/N: I'm heading for summer vacation next week, so I might not be able to update for the next 10-15 days. I am sorry, but I need some time off with my family :)

_It must have been love but it's over now._  
 _It must have been good but I lost it somehow._  
 _It must have been love but it's over now._  
 _From the moment we touched, 'til the time had run out._  
**It must have been love, Roxette**

Emma was waiting by Killian’s desk that afternoon when she saw him entering the room, bringing in a handcuffed man forcefully. He handed the man to a couple of officers.

“Sign him in and put him in an interrogation room.” Killian said before walking towards his desk. Mac was right behind him, carrying two ice packs in his hand.

“Here you go, mate.” He said as he threw one package at Killian who caught it with his hand and brought it to his face as he sat in a chair next to Emma, trying to avoid her eyes. She sighed and grabbed the package from his hand.

“Let me…” She said.

“Thanks, love.” He said sheepishly.

“Don’t thank me yet.” She retorted as she pushed the package forcefully against his bruised face, making him wince. “That was for this morning.” She whispered at him.

“Fair enough.” He replied before losing himself in her eyes for a minute. Mac cleared his throat to get them out of their daze.

“We caught Thomas’ right hand.” He told Emma. “That was the guy we just brought in. We think he might know where Thomas is. We have to interrogate him.”

“We should do it right away.” Killian said. “I don’t want to waste any time.”

“So, good cop, bad cop?” Mac asked.

“Actually,” Killian said. “I was thinking I’d like Emma to be present in the interrogation.” Emma looked at him surprised.

“So it’s bad cop, hot cop instead?” Mac smiled raising an eyebrow.

“Isn’t it always? You play the bad cop and I use my charm. I’m devilishly handsome after all,” Killian smirked and Emma scoffed.

“Right…” Mac was still waiting for a real answer and Killian knew it.

“Mate, I’m going to let you in on a little secret…” Killian grabbed Emma’s hand as he removed it from his face along with the ice package and leaned in towards Mac.  “Emma here is great at spotting lies. If you think you and I are good – _and we are_ – we are amateurs compared to her. She never fails.” He smirked.

“So you are telling me that she’s never fallen for your bullshit?” Mac asked looking proudly at Emma.

“ _Never_. Actually, that is how we met. I tried to lie to her once.” Killian looked at Emma with a fond look, the memories coming back to him.

“And…” Mac asked intrigued.

“And I called him on it and tied him to a tree until he told me the truth.” Emma smiled fondly at Killian.

“Aye, she bested me… and it wasn’t even the only time.” Killian admitted looking sheepishly at her. She smiled back in the same way.

“I’d love to have seen that….” Mac said amused. “Ok, I’ll go see if our prisoner is ready for interrogation.” He said as he got up and left the room.

Once they were alone, Emma turned to look at Killian.

“Are you sure?”

He looked at her with a confident stare, “Emma, regardless how much we’ve fucked up our personal lives, we do make a hell of a team. _I need you_ in this interrogation. You are simply the best to go into that room with me and spot if this bastard is lying to us. He’s the best chance we have to get Thomas’ location. I intend to use the best I’ve got to get that information. And the best, is _you_.”

She nodded at him, a timid smile on her face. It was only then that both realized that Killian was still holding her hand. He quickly let go and scratched his neck behind his ear… “Sorry…” He said softly.  

 

They headed for the interrogation room and Killian held the door open for her. The guy looked positively disgusting. He had a lascivious stare and a cocky smile and Emma could feel his eyes roaming all over her body. It made her feel slightly uncomfortable, but she was used to it as well in her line of work. From the corner of her eye she saw Killian’s hand flexing in a fist. It was clear he had noticed the stares she was getting. He looked briefly at her, concern in his eyes, but she nodded and smiled at him to let him know she was ok.

Killian walked towards the table and put his hand on it, giving the guy a menacing stare.

“Where’s Thomas?” He asked determined.

“I don’t know… he never tells me.” The guy shrugged. “He probably left the state. He knows the police are after him. He’ll be in Canada by now.”

Killian turned around, facing Emma and spoke next to her ear.  

“What do you think, love?” He whispered. The nearness of him was a little distracting for her, the memories of those same lips all over her body the night before awakening feelings she never remembered having before. _Ever_. She took a deep breath and tried to concentrate.

“He’s lying…” She whispered to him and it was his turn to feel the heat all over his body. He honestly considered pulling her into an empty interrogation room and taking her over the table before he shook off those thoughts. _Distractions_. This was exactly what he’d meant before. One night with her and he knew it’d be months before he’d be able to even start to forget her. But he had to concentrate on the case now.

He turned around and gave the guy a cocky smile, his pirate mask as up as possible. It was breathtaking to watch, Emma had to give him that. Killian Jones, with his three hundred years of pirating experience, closing in on a lowlife who thought that actually had a chance against him. She almost felt sorry for the guy. _Almost_.  

“The lady here thinks you are lying, mate. I tend to believe her word on these things.” Killian stated in a calm, calculated voice that gave her chills.

“And who is she? I’ve never seen her before… is she a new cop?” The guys’ eyes were all over her again.

“That’s not important, mate.” Killian’s voice started to get a little more threatening. “Do you really think Thomas will reward you for your silence? If he were here, he’d throw you to the wolves. He probably already knows we caught you and he’s replacing you at this very instant. You’ll no longer be his first mate. Hell, I think that he might already be plotting how to get rid of you. He was never one to trust others, right?”

The guy shrugged and looked to the side, pretending to be unimpressed, but Emma could see that Killian was getting to him.

“After all, remind me how you got to be his right hand? Didn’t you take it after the last guy appeared dead in an alley? And wasn’t that two days after we released him from custody?” Killian’s voice got even lower “Do you really think you have any chance to make it out of this alive if I let you go?”

“He knows I won’t say a fucking thing.”

“Does he? Really?” Killian tilted his head to the side, a ruthless smirk to his face. “I wonder if he’d believe that after I let my informants know that you’ve singed.”

The guy looked at him defiantly. “He won’t believe you.”

“Oh, but he will. He won’t take a chance that he’s wrong about you. The problem with you bastards is that you have no code. You’ve stabbed each other in the back so many times that you don’t know where your loyalties lie, if you have any left. All I need is one rumor to reach Thomas’ ears and you’d be dead the minute we let you walk out of the station.”

He had him. Emma looked at how the guy’s physical response had changed and turned to look at Killian. He knew he had him, he knew he had pushed into the exact place he had to push in order to get to the guy, and he was ready to deliver the final blow. And it was mesmerizing to watch. He was good at this. Scratch that. _Killian Jones was fucking incredible at his job_. An intense sense of pride ran through her.

Killian looked briefly at Emma and he couldn’t believe his eyes. Was she looking at him with pride? She seemed... amazed. _By him_. And it made him want her even more than before. He gave her a quick smirk before turning back to the guy.

“You know, you are as good as dead if I let you go. And you know it. Do yourself a favor… keep loyal to the only person you’ve been loyal your entire life: yourself. Tell me where Thomas is and I might consider keeping you here long enough to save your life.”

“You wouldn’t send me to die… you still need to know where he is. I want to make a deal.”

_Bingo_. Emma thought.

“NO.” Killian stated. “No deal. You’ve harassed and molested a girl, we will press charges against you. There will be no lesser sentence; there will be no special treatment.”

“Then why should I tell you anything!”

“Because I’ll make sure you are released within the hour if you don’t, walking right into your death.” Killian said calmly. “Now, tell me where Thomas is and you get to live. Behind bars, but you get to live.” He sneered.

“Alright, he’s hiding in a warehouse on the outskirts of town.”

“Write it down.” Killian pointed to the notebook and he approached Emma for confirmation.

“He’s telling the truth…” She confirmed.

“Thank you, love.” He said and his hand squeezed her arm in gratitude. An electrical shock passed through both of them, the tension almost bearable.

“You are a fine piece of ass, aren’t you?” The guy’s lascivious comment pulled them out from their daze. Killian’s hand tightened in her arm as his jaw clenched. Emma looked at the guy, who was currently licking his lips and giving her a disgusting look. “Come on, bitch, when it was the last time someone fucked you properly?”

It happened faster than she could have seen it. Killian had turned around, pure rage pouring from his every pore as he grabbed the guy by the hair and smashed his face against the table.

“Apologize to the lady, mate.” He spat with a ruthless tone Emma had not heard in him in years. _Captain Hook has just entered the building._  

“Killian…” She tried to get his attention, but she knew it was pointless.

The guy scoffed. “Is he doing you? Cops have no imagination, sweetheart… You need a real man.” Ok, that idiot really did not know when to shut up, Emma thought. She stopped Killian’s arm before he was able to smash the guy’s face again.

“ _Hook_ …” She spoke intently, her eyes boring into him. She held his stare until she saw the anger leaving his eyes and Killian was back. She arched an eyebrow at him, speaking silently.

_Let me._

Killian nodded and took one step away, as she approached the guy. He still remained close. Emma looked at the guy smirking as she leaned down almost face to face to the lowlife.

“Actually, I can barely walk after how thoroughly he fucked me last night.” She whispered before rising up and looking at Killian, biting her lower lip in a daring expression.

Killian’s look was almost indescribable, a mix of surprise, awe and pride. And then he gave her that smug smile she knew so well.

“I think we are done here, love.” He said smugly.

“Lead the way, Detective.” She replied as she followed him to the hall.

“Was that necessary?” He asked her as they reached a secluded spot in the hallway and they were alone.

“Well, I felt the need to defend your reputation. And it’s not like I had to lie.” She smiled at him. He gave her a confused look. “Don’t read that much into it, Killian…” She deflected as she walked past him and headed to the door.

“It was great for me too.” He whispered and she stopped in her tracks to turn around.

He looked wrecked and she knew the feeling. She smiled at him before turning around and heading to where Mac was waiting for them. Killian took a deep breath and followed her.

_Distractions. Brilliant idea, mate._

 

Mac and Killian were standing on his desk, studying a map. Several officers were scattered around waiting for instructions.

“We will make two teams.” Killian said. “I’ll lead one and Mac will lead the other, as usual.”

“Half of Killian’s team will come from the front, smoking them out and forcing them to go to the back, where the rest of his team will be waiting.” Mac explained. “My team will act as back up and provide cover for Killian’s team. We’ll also catch up any of them that get pass them.”

“Are we clear?” Killian asked and they all nodded. “Alright, we meet again in 30 minutes. Be ready.” He said. The officers started clearing the room and Killian approached Emma.

“Come with me, Swan.” He said as he grabbed her gently by the elbow and started walking.

“Where are we going?” She asked intrigued.

“This way…” He said as his hand went to her lower back, guiding her to one of the rooms.

It was a storage room: she could see guns, handcuffs, ammunition, all neatly ordered.

“Are you planning to handcuff me in here so I don’t get to be part of the operation?” She asked directly.

Killian smirked, “Tempting…” He said as he removed his shoulder holster, grabbed a bulletproof vest and adjusted it on. He grabbed his gun and another gun and secured them on his waist at the back. He turned to look at her. “But I have no intention to handcuff you anywhere, Swan.” He said.

_Unless it’s to a bed._

“Unless it’s to a bed?” She asked mischievously, as if she was reading his mind. He chuckled.

“Keep saying things like that and I might handcuff you here and lock the door so we don’t get interrupted…” He bit his lower lip. He knew he’d beat himself up over this for weeks, but he just could not resist it anymore.

“We still have thirty minutes...” She raised the bet arching an eyebrow at him.

“The only problem, Swan…” He said as he got closer to her, invading her personal space; that personal space he’d claimed as _his_ years ago… “Is that I don’t think you can keep _quiet_.” He smirked at her and took two steps back. “I trust that you are still allowed to carry firearms?” He asked as he pulled two guns and ammunition from a closet.

“Yes.” She said. He handed her the guns and grabbed another bulletproof vest.

“You have to wear this. It’s not open to discussion.” He commanded.

“I wasn’t planning to fight you on it.” She said as she adjusted both guns on her back as well.

“Here… let me help.” He said as his hand went to her shoulder and started to peel of her leather jacket slowly. She could feel her body igniting at the simple touch and she held her breath.

He took off her jacket and slowly put the vest on and started to adjust it. There was such intimacy between them at the moment that it was hard to remember that in less than thirty minutes they’d be risking their lives. He shook off his own desires at the moment and continued talking.

 

“You heard us back there. I’ll go first, and Mac will cover me. He will stay behind… that is how we do it. That is how we’ve always done it. I get on the line of fire; he covers me from behind and stays mostly out of harm’s way unless it’s absolutely necessary for him to risk his life. Do you understand?” He looked at her intently.

“But what about you? It’s ok to risk your life?” She asked, her voice less sure than she intended to, but his hand and arm were on her body and it was impossible to concentrate.

“Mac has a wife and two kids, Emma. I’m not going to let him take the bigger risk. I have no one waiting for me. If something happens to me, there might be people that would miss me, but I would not be leaving a child fatherless. You know how it is to grow up without your parents… I cannot let that happen to these children if I can avoid it.” He said as he finished adjusting her vest and his hands, real and prosthetic, rested on her hips. _When had he gotten this close to her?_ There was literally no space between them… he could feel all the places where his body was pressed to hers.

“And Mac is ok with it?” She asked, her hands going to his upper arms on their own accord and resting there.

“No, he’s not. He hates it but he lets me do it because he knows I’m right. And it’s the same reason why _you_ are staying behind as well. You have to think of Henry, Emma. He already lost his father… don’t put yourself unnecessarily at risk.”

“Killian…” She whispered breathlessly.

His eyes bore into hers with such intensity that the rest of her sentence died in her lips. He cradled her face, his hand slowly caressing her cheek and she lost herself in his blue eyes. She couldn’t resist any longer so she leaned in to press her lips softly against his. He responded to her lips, his body pressed fully into hers. Her hand went to his hair as they kissed slowly, almost tenderly. He broke the kiss sighing, his lips still brushing into hers, his forehead against hers, his eyes closed.

“Don’t do anything stupid, Swan.” He pleaded.


	22. The Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!

_Yeah, I would fight for you, I'd lie for you,_   
_Walk the wire for you, yeah, I'd die for you._   
_You know it's true:_   
_Everything I do, oh, I do it for you.  
_ **Everything I do, I do it for you; Bryan Adams**

Emma contemplated the battered warehouse in front of them. The little windows were covered with newspaper and it looked inhabited. She was standing behind Mac, far behind the action. Killian wasn’t exaggerating about keeping her safe. But she could understand his point of view, even if she did not agree with him.

She saw Killian silently approaching the warehouse with his team and her stomach fluttered in fear. She did not like seeing him walking to the dangerous unknown. For the first time in years, she wished she had her magic back so she could just blast everything that might have gotten on his way.

But she didn’t. So all she could do was hold onto her gun tightly and hope for the best.

Killian’s team moved quickly, blasting the door and entering the building. And then she lost sight of him as everything became mayhem of shouts, kicks and gunshots. She frantically searched for Killian, but he was nowhere to be seen.

Some men came running out of the building, gun in hand and Mac’s team sprinted to action.

“Get them!” Mac instructed. He looked back and shouted, “Emma, STAY HERE!” before starting his own pursuit.

Emma’s feet were itching for her to go after Mac and help him, but Killian’s voice in her head resonated hard and deep.

_Don’t do anything stupid, Swan_.

And then she saw Thomas running towards the left, away from the officers that were busy trying to catch the other men. She didn’t hesitate before pulling her gun and starting to chase him. From the corner of her eye she saw Killian chasing Thomas as well, and he was closing in on him fast. She kept one eye on Thomas and one on Killian and then all of the sudden, she saw a man behind Killian raising his gun and aiming towards him.

“KILLIAN!” She yelled as she pointed her gun and fired towards the guy. She missed the shot, but it was all it took for the guy to lose his aim.

Killian heard Emma’s voice calling on him and his eyes searched for her frantically. He saw her standing, firing her arm to someone behind him. She’d clearly saved his life again. And then he noticed the man behind her getting ready to shoot.

“SWAN!” He yelled as he quickly sprinted towards her. He reached her just in time to pull her away from the direct shot but he wasn’t fast enough and he felt the bullet pierce her arm. She fell into his arms and he lost his mind, his worse fears becoming true in front of him.

“Emma!” He called for her desperately.

As he lifted his gaze, he saw Thomas aiming a gun directly at them and his body did not hesitate as he pushed Emma behind him and shielded her from the fire shots coming their way.

He counted two before collapsing, his back and head hitting the floor and he pulled Emma down with him, still trying to shield her with his body. 

 


	23. The Wait

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your comments. I know it was mean, but I *had* to.

_Take a look at me now_  
 _'Cause that's just an empty space_  
 _But to wait for you is all I can do_  
 _And that's what I've got to face_  
**Against All Odds, Phil Collins**

“Killian! Killian wake up! Get an ambulance in here right NOW!”

Killian could hear bits and pieces of screams around him… it sounded like Mac, but he couldn’t be sure. He tried to assess the situation through his foggy mind and then all his thoughts and fears came back rushing back to him. He quickly tried to stand. “Emma!”  He screamed in horror as he tried to see what had happened to her. His head started spinning the moment he tried to get up and Mac had to catch him before he fell.

“Killian, don’t move, you might have a concussion.” Mac urged but Killian would have none of it, he’d seen Emma lying on the floor, unconscious and her arm bleeding.

“Swan!” He threw himself at her, raw desperation invading his body as his hand reached her face.  “Emma…” He cried in a broken whisper, his eyes searching frantically over her.

“Killian, the ambulance is coming, she’ll be ok. The bullet only pierced her arm, the wound is mostly superficial.” Mac tried to reach Killian, but he knew it was pointless. His look of desperation was telling Mac that Killian was far beyond reasoning, his worst fears taking the best of him. At this point, he also knew that any attempt at trying to separate him from Emma to see how _he_ was doing was pointless. It would have to wait until they got into the hospital.

When the ambulance finally came, it took Mac and two more officers to remove Killian far enough for the paramedics to assess Emma’s condition. She was stable and breathing, but unconscious. Killian refused to be attended and he demanded to ride in the ambulance with her, never leaving her side as he held her hand in his.

Mac found him in the hospital waiting room, a complete wreck, as expected. His hair was spiked in all directions, as he probably had run his hand through it constantly. His eyes were swollen, his stare lost in the horizon.

“Killian…” Mac started softly, carefully approaching him. “She’ll be fine. It was a superficial wound.”

“It’s all my fault.” Killian said. “I shouldn’t have let her come. I should have locked her in that room and left without her.”

“You know she wouldn’t have let you… this is not your fault, Killian.” Mac sighed. He clasped Killian’s shoulder. “Do you need me to call her family?”

“I already did.” Killian replied. “They’ll be here shortly.”

About an hour later, David and Mary Margaret entered the waiting room frantically.

“Killian, what happened!?” Mary Margaret cried, her face etched with worry.

“She was hit by a bullet in her arm. She was bleeding and lost consciousness.” Killian explained. “The wound seemed superficial when the paramedics took care of her at the site.”

“How is she?” David asked.

“The doctors are still with her…” Killian finished and he gave them an apologetic look. “I’m sorry…” He murmured in despair.

“Oh, Killian…” Mary Margaret said in tears as she held his hand. “It’s going to be ok.” She smiled at him amidst her tears.

David nodded at him as he helped Mary Margaret sit.

As the minutes passed, Killian kept getting more and more restless and Mac was getting even more worried. Killian might not remember it, but Mac had a clear view on how he stood up to shield Emma and took two direct bullets as a result.  

He approached Killian and spoke directly to him.

“Killian, you need to see a doctor…” He said.

“Not until I know that Emma is safe…” Killian replied stubbornly.

Mac lost his patience, “God damn it, Killian, you took two bullets in the chest!”

“I had my vest. I’m fine.”

“And you crashed down on the floor. You might have a concussion; you _have_ to let the doctors examine you. _I’ll fucking drag you there by force if I have to._ ” Mac threatened him.

Killian’s ruthless stare made him back down, “I will not bloody leave, Mac. Do not push it or I swear to all the gods in every realm, I will punch you, mate. LEAVE ME THE BLOODY HELL ALONE.” He finished before exiting the waiting room into the hall.

David approached Mac. “Is that true? He was shot?”

Mac nodded. “He shielded Emma from the gunshots. He was impacted twice in the chest before collapsing. He had his vest, but still…” He trailed off, sighing.

“ _How_ is he even awake and pacing around?” David wondered, though he had an idea _why_.

“I don’t know… he’s probably running on adrenaline and shock. But when that wears off, I don’t know what will happen to him. He needs to see a doctor.” Mac finished.

“Let me try.” David asked and Mac nodded.

 

David found Killian in the hallway, next to a vending machine. He was pacing around and David could feel Killian’s raw desperation.

“Hook…” He called. “Look at me.” David spoke confidently. “She’s fine, Killian.” He told him holding Killian’s stare.

Killian’s eyes filled with tears and David could see how he was breaking apart.  “I tried to get her to stay away. I tried, mate.” He looked at David with a devastating stare.

“You kept your promise.” David reassured him. “As I knew you would. She’ll be fine, Killian. _She’s safe_.” David stressed the last sentence, forcing Killian to understand him. “Let go, mate.”

And then Killian’s sight went blank as he collapsed. David was able to quickly catch him as he called for Mac.

“Get a stretcher and a doctor in here, NOW!”

 

Emma drifted to consciousness slowly. Her throat ached and she could feel a wincing pain in her arm. She opened her eyes slowly.

“Hey…” Mary Margaret said. “You are awake.”

“What happened?” She asked confused.

“You were wounded.” David offered. “Someone tried to shoot you. Hook was able to pull you away but the bullet reached your arm…”

Emma vaguely remembered bits and pieces of the scene...“Killian! Is he ok?” She asked worryingly.

Mary Margaret looked at her with a reassuring smile in her eyes. Emma turned to look at David, who sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “He’s ok, we think. He collapsed in the hospital corridor and they took him for examination.” David looked at her directly. “He shielded you from the open fire, Emma. From what his partner told us, he took two bullets on the chest before crashing on the floor and shielding your body with his.”

Emma’s heart stopped for a second. “What do you mean he collapsed in the hospital? Didn’t the paramedics assist him on the site?”

Mary Margaret smiled softly at her, “He refused attention, Emma. He stayed with you the entire time.”

“We were trying to convince him to get examined when he collapsed.” David continued. “He’s resting now… they think he might have a concussion.”

“He mainly needs to rest, Emma. His body went through a lot of stress” Mary Margaret said reassuringly. “Mac told us that he asked the doctors to give him some powerful tranquilizers to knock him down for several hours so his body could actually rest. He’s afraid he’d walk out of his bed if he’s awake.”

“And go where?” Emma asked confused. David looked at her with a disbelieving smile and raised an eyebrow at her.

“Oh…” Realization dawned on Emma. “Can Mac do that? Force them to drug him to sleep?”

“He’s Killian’s emergency contact.” Mary Margaret explained. “He has the power to make medical decisions for him.”

It made sense. Killian had no direct family, no one other than Mac that could make those decisions for him. And it broke Emma’s heart.  

_It should have been me. It could have been me._

“I want to see him.” Emma said. “Do I have to stay here?” She asked trying to get up slowly.

“No, you’ve actually been cleared.” David said. “You have to stay at home and rest, but you are allowed to leave.”

“Let’s go then…” She said as she tried to stand up while Mary Margaret helped her.

 

Emma stood outside Killian’s room, David and Mary Margaret by her side, taking in on the scene. Killian was peacefully asleep in the hospital bed. Mac was sitting in a chair next to his bed and a brunette was sitting next to him, holding Mac’s hand. Two police officers that Emma recognized from the station were guarding the room and several other officers were in the waiting room, drinking coffee and talking.

She recalled the other time Killian was asleep in a hospital bed: broken ribs, bruised face, handcuffed to a bed. All alone, with no one to care for him. Not even her. Because she didn’t allow herself to care. _Because she couldn’t take a chance on him._

And here he was now: his partner guarding his sleep, his partner’s wife next to him. His colleagues scattered around the waiting room. All of them there for one reason and one reason only: Killian Jones. Their partner, their colleague, their future captain. Their _friend_. They all cared for him. They all took a chance on him.

_They did what you couldn’t do._

“We should go home.” Emma said to her parents.

“Don’t you want to see him?” Mary Margaret asked gently.

Emma’s eyes filled with tears. “No, let him rest.” She said before she walked towards the door.

 

Killian opened his eyes slowly, trying to adjust to the light in the room.

“Welcome back, sunshine. You scared us there for a minute.” Mac welcomed him with a small grin. He had dark bags under his eyes and was sporting a bit of a scruff.

“What happened?” Killian asked hoarsely and he felt his throat ache.

“You collapsed in the hallway. _As I predicted_.”  Mac smirked sadly at him. “You took two bullets to the chest and crashed on the hard pavement. Then you refused to be assisted by paramedics and paraded like a caged animal for hours in here. Your body couldn’t take any more stress and shut down, Killian.” Mac finished sighing.

Killian felt the silent reproach in Mac’s tone. “I’m sorry, mate…” He said. “How long have I been out?” He asked.

“Over sixteen hours. I had them knock you down with medication so your body had a chance to recover.” Mac answered earnestly. “And I’m not going to apologize for it. I’m your emergency contact. I make the decisions for your health when you _clearly_ cannot make the right one on your own.”

“How is Emma?” Killian asked directly. It was the first question he wanted to ask, but he knew Mac needed to say his peace.

“She’s fine. It was a superficial wound and she was cleared hours ago. Her family took her home.” Mac replied. 

Killian sighed deeply, all the fears he’d felt before coming back to haunt him again. Mac decided to leave him to his thoughts.

“You still need to rest, Killian, so you’ll be cleared later this afternoon. Just _try_ to take it easy.” He said before patting his shoulder and leaving the room. “I’m going home to my family. Call me if you need anything.”

“Aye, Mac. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Killian stared at the ceiling, his mind racing with thoughts. Everything he knew, everything he had tried so hard to believe in, was collapsing right in front of him. Nothing was certain anymore.

But he knew only one thing. He had to see her. 


	24. The Surrender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this one! As usual, all the love to Sandra and Jess. :)

_My hands are tied, my body bruised_   
_She got me with nothing to win_   
_And nothing left to lose  
_ **With or without you, U2**

Emma was sitting on the couch in her living room, browsing through the TV channels, dressed in her flannel pajama pants and a long sleeved shirt that covered her bandaged arm. David and Mary Margaret had finally left, after she told them she was fine and she wanted some quiet time. Henry had wanted to stay with her, but she convinced him to go to Regina’s. She wanted to be alone for a while.  

She heard the knock on the door and slowly got up to answer it.

It should have come as a surprise to see him standing there, in front of her, but it didn’t.

He was wearing jeans, a grey T-shirt and a leather jacket. He looked impossibly handsome, with his hair disheveled and his clear blue eyes, not even a hint on eyeliner this time. He looked even younger than he claimed to be, if possible.

As he did years ago, his face lightened when he saw her. “Swan…” He said.

She opened the door for him to enter the apartment and he headed directly to the living room.

“Are you alone?” He asked, his back to her.

“Yes…” She replied as she followed him.

He turned around abruptly and she could see the anger in his eyes.

“What were you thinking, Swan!? I asked you not to do anything stupid!!” He blurted out in a hardly controlled rage.

“Mac and his team were busy, I saw Thomas escaping and I went after him. Then I saw that man aiming at you and I had to _do_ something…” She looked at him, her green eyes full of determination. “I am not going to apologize for trying to save your life, Killian. You did the same thing.”

“It’s my job, Swan. I’m a detective, I conduct these raids.” He sighed.

“It doesn’t matter…” She said. “I am not going to apologize for preventing you from being shot in the back. _I will not._ ”

“I almost lost you…” He stated, his voice full of emotion, his intense blue eyes reaching to her very core.

“It was nothing, Killian. The bullet barely hit me. It is not a big deal.” She said dismissively and he lost his mind over her freaking stupidity.

He slowly reached for her arm and even though he was mad as bloody hell, he remained calm as he gently pulled her sleeve up.

“You call _this_ nothing?” He said in a controlled voice as his eyes went to her arm.

And then his heart stopped. He was expecting to see a white bandage; and there was one peeking through. But it was covered by a black fabric that wrapped her arm. He’d recognize it anywhere. He gasped and looked at her, confusion in his eyes.

“Is that my scarf?” He asked surprised.

She nodded.

“You kept it?” She nodded again.  “All these years? Why?” There was confusion and awe in his voice. He couldn’t believe it.

“I don’t know…” She deflected.

“Don’t lie to me, Swan.” He pleaded with her. “Not now.”

She looked at him, her green eyes filled with longing. “You took care of me. No one had taken care of me like that before… I – I wanted to remember that.” She smiled softly, almost defiantly. “You’re not the only one who gets to keep tokens of our story, Killian.” She finished daringly.

It was more than what he could take. He leaned in to kiss her forcefully, putting all his fears and tensions from the past few days in his kiss, pulling her to him like a magnet. He broke the kiss and collapsed on his knees, defeated. When he looked up, Emma could see he had broken in tears.

“Damn it, Swan. You could have died. I can’t see you hurt. I can’t bear it.” He pleaded.  “ _I can’t lose you, my love_.” His voice was a whisper that she almost didn’t hear.

She kneeled next to him, her hands caressing his face and her lips kissed his cheek softly, tenderly. She couldn’t help herself, she didn’t want to. She wanted to feel him again, pressed against her, she wanted to feel that certainty that she’d only felt in his arms. She wanted to feel his passion wrapped in that underneath devotion he only had for her. She wanted him to lose himself in her arms, she wanted to comfort him and make him feel wanted, desired.

“Killian…” She whispered into his lips before kissing him wildly.

“Tell me what you want me to do, Swan.” He asked desperately, his kisses matching her passion. “Tell me what you need…”

“I need to feel alive. Make me feel alive, Killian.” She whispered against his lips.

He stood up and scooped her up in his arms, carrying her to her bedroom as she continued to kiss him. He gently laid her in the bed and kissed her slowly, gently. He removed his jacket before reaching out and carefully removing her shirt. His eyes travelled through her body, drinking her. She reached out to pull his shirt, but he stopped her.

“Stay there, love. Let me make _you_ feel.” He smirked mischievously at her, lust and playfulness in his eyes.

And then he proceeded to explore every bit of her body, his hand and his lips thoroughly in action. He mapped every part, every freckle, every scar, memorizing each one of them and each sound his movements would elicit from her.

He looked at her with a smug smirk after he was done and he caressed her thigh slowly, pressing soft kisses to her shoulder.

“You still have too many clothes.” She purred to him.

“I wasn’t planning… I – I didn’t bring…” He trailed off, slightly embarrassed.

She pushed him onto his back and straddled him and leaned in to press a kiss on his lips.

“Top drawer,” She smirked. “You were right, I wasn’t celibate either.”

“Swan, we shouldn’t…” He sighed. “This… this is a bad idea.” He ran his hand over his face.

She took his hand and moved it away from his face, her green eyes looking straight at him, “Don’t you want me?”

“Gods, Emma, you know I do.” He said desperately, his blue eyes darkening.

“Then just do it, Killian, _please_.” She said as she kissed him forcefully, only breaking the kiss to take his shirt off. Her hands traveled through his chest, slowly caressing his bruises.

“Does it hurt?” She asked.

He shook his head, his eyes almost black with desire and she bent to kiss him again.

“I want you, Killian…  I need you… No one has ever made me feel this alive.” She felt bold; braver than she’d ever felt before, adrenaline running through her veins, making her lower her walls. She looked at him with lustful eyes before leaning in and whispering in his ear. “No one has ever fucked me like you did.”

He groaned as his arm grabbed her and he flipped them, her lying on her back on the bed. He gave her a lustful, ruthless smirk before leaning in and kissing her passionately.

Later that night, he stayed awake just looking at her. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, so many things he wanted to show her. He knew by now that he’d never come back from this, he’d never be able to move on from her, no matter how much he tried. But he needed more than just this, he wanted more and he’d rather have nothing than just a romp with her.

He slowly kissed her forehead before carefully leaving the bed and retrieving his clothes. He took one last look at her.

_I love you, Swan._

And then closed the door silently, escaping into the night.

When she awoke the next morning, he was gone. The scarf was carefully folded over the pillow.

A gold coin lay on top of it.


	25. The Chance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all very much for your comments and kudos. I hope you like this chapter :)

 

_Don't lay our love to rest_  
 _cause we could stand up to the test_  
 _We got everything and more than we had planned_  
 _More than the rivers that run inland_  
 _We got it all in our hands_  
**All for Love, Rod Stewart/Bryan Adams/Sting**

He noticed Mac’s eyes on him the moment he entered the office. Mac took one look at Killian and knew it was going to be an interesting day, to say the least.

“Everything alright, Killian?” Mac asked.

“Aye…” Killian replied. “I just need some time to figure this out.” He said. Mac was about to ask what exactly he meant by “ _this”_ , but bit his tongue instead. “Do you mind if I use the office?” Killian pointed to the vacant office nearby.

“Killian, you know very well that will be _your_ office once they make you captain. You don’t have to ask permission to use it.”

Killian nodded and headed there. Mac couldn’t control himself any longer.

“What do you want me to do when she comes looking for you?” Mac asked directly and Killian gave him a confused look. “I’m not an idiot, Killian. I called you ten times last night. You never picked up. I drove to your house… you were not there.”

“I was…” Killian started sheepishly but Mac cut him off.

“Don’t you dare lie to me by telling me you were on your boat, mate.” Mac sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Just tell me what you want me to tell her when she comes looking for you.”

“Send her in.” Killian said.

 

As predicted, Emma Swan walked in almost an hour later. Mac sighed and pointed to the office. “He’s there…”

Emma nodded and knocked on the office’s door. She didn’t wait for an answer, opening the door and entering the room. She made sure to close it before turning around and look at him.

He was sitting on the chair behind the office desk, his hand in his head, looking away. He turned around to look at her through sad eyes.

She slowly approached and put the gold coin on the desk. “You left this at my apartment.”

“Aye, Swan. It was for you.” He said in a low voice full of self-loathing.

“Another token?” She asked. “You thought I’d want something to remember you by?” Her voice was shaking. She took a deep breath trying to calm herself. “You can’t keep doing this, Killian.”

“I know…” He sighed. “I know, Swan. I’ll stay away from you. You have my word. If needed, I’ll just remove myself from the investigation. Mac can take care of it and work with you. ”

She could feel the hurt running through her. There he was, self-loathing and devastated. As he used to be. Something in her snapped and she felt the need to talk to him. _Really_ talk to him.

“When I left Storybrooke and came back here…” She started as she sat on a chair and faced him, the desk in between. “I was tired, Killian. I was tired of being the Savior; I was tired of villains and curses, fairytales and all that magical nonsense.”

He looked at her, confusion in his eyes, but he kept silent. She smiled at him. “I never asked for any of that, I was never part of any of that and I didn’t want to be. I resented you so much for bringing me back…”

“It was the right thing to do.” He whispered.

“It was. I know that now, Killian.” She replied. “But it was never going to stop. There will always be one more villain, one more curse, one more threat and I just couldn’t deal with it anymore.” She looked at him, tears almost coming to her eyes. “What if the next time they succeeded in getting Henry? What if next time my magic wasn’t enough? Henry had already lost Neal, I couldn’t risk it anymore.”

He could relate to that feeling, it was the same feeling that kept him going first into danger instead of Mac, the same feeling that made him beg her to stay behind. “You wouldn’t have been alone, Emma. We would have been there for you, fighting with you, protecting you.” _I would have protected you._

“And then I risked losing David or Mary Margaret in the next one? The odds for all of us making it always alive were low, Killian. You know that.” She replied, and her tears were running through her face. “What if next time giving up my magic wasn’t enough and I lost _you_?” She choked on the word.

“If there is one thing I’m good at, love, it’s surviving.” He said daringly.

“Until the day that your luck and your wits ran out and I had to see you die because you were trying to protect me? Like you did in Dark Hollow? Like you did with Zelena? With Anton?” She countered. “I’ve seen too many people die on me, Killian: Neal, Graham, even Walsh.” She averted her eyes. “I couldn’t add you to the list…”

“So you just pushed me away and ran to another city?” He asked.

“When I was a kid, I ran away. It’s just what I did. But the first time I did it, I had a thought. What if I miss this place?” She told him. “And I never did… none of those places weren’t my home.”

“Did you miss Storybrooke when you left?” He asked, his voice full of raw emotion.

“No.” She said and she saw how he reacted to the news, his eyes filling with sadness. “I never missed the town. I missed my parents.” She smiled softly. “And then, this amazing thing happened. My parents, _Snow White and Prince Charming_ , decided that a relationship with me was worth more than their former kingdom, than their origins, than anything. And they became Mary Margaret and David again and moved to Queens to be in my life. They chose _me_.”

He could sense the emotion in her voice and he could read all the things she was not saying: her parents had finally put her first. Not the savior, not the person that was going to bring the happy endings, not any of that. They put Emma Swan first. They made her their priority. He smiled at her.

“You got your family together, Swan.” He said.

“I did. I finally did.” She said. “And you know what we do instead of figuring out how to break the next curse or how to defeat the villain of the day? We have family dinners. We go out to see Henry play sports. We do normal stuff. I _like_ doing normal stuff.”

“I know what you mean…” He sighed, because he’d had a taste of what she was referring to in the last three years and he had to admit he liked it too.

“Neal was right…” Emma sighed.

“About what?” He asked.

“You don’t have a home until you miss it.” She said. “But home isn’t a place, at least not for me. It’s not New York, or Boston, or Storybrooke. It was the _people_.” She smiled. 

They stayed silent for a moment, until Killian finally spoke. “So, you don’t have any regrets, then?” He asked intently.

“I regret many things, Killian.” She said meeting his eyes.

“Like what?”

“I never should have left you on the top of that beanstalk.” She said slowly.

“I would have betrayed you eventually.” He said, a small smile forming on the side of his mouth.

“No, you wouldn’t…” She said, so sure of the words that it was impossible to lie to her at that moment.

“No, I wouldn’t.” He admitted, lost in his memories.

She knew now that he would have fought with everything in him to get her home. Like he had so many other times. If he were by her side on Lake Nostos, Cora wouldn’t have even come near her heart. As she thought of that, something else triggered in her mind.

“Killian…” She called and he looked at her “Did you let me win at Lake Nostos?”

“Are you just figuring that out, love?” He smirked cockily at her. “I have centuries of experience in swordplay, you had what? One fight?”

“Why did you do it?” She asked curiously.

“I couldn’t hurt you.” He admitted, his hand fidgeting over the desk.

“Even then?” She asked surprised.

“Even then, love.” He ran his hand through his hair, sighing. “You look at me and I cave, Swan. It’s the way it is…”

She fell silent again and he let her be, lost in his own thoughts. She looked at him, his perfect profile lightened by the sunlight, devilishly handsome. In some ways, he was still the same man she met in the Enchanted Forest. In others, he had changed so much. He had pulled out of the darkness and into the light, rebuilding himself from centuries of pain and solitude into the strong police detective she was seeing now. A leader. A hero. He needed to hear that.

“Remember when you shot Belle and that car hit you?” She blurted out without even thinking.

“Not my finest moment, love.” He smiled sadly, pained by the memory.

“You were all alone, chained to a hospital bed.” He nodded painfully and she continued her story. “When they released me the other day and I went to see you; Mac was there with his wife, next to your bed. Your squad was guarding the entrance of the room. Your friends were all there for you.”

She looked into his blue eyes, trying to express what she was thinking. “They care for you, Killian. They respect you. And that wasn’t something Regina fabricated for you. That was all _you._ ” She smiled at him encouraging. “You are going to be a great captain.”

He shook his head sadly, averting his eyes. “I don’t see that happening for a long time, love.”

“What do you mean?” She asked confused.

“Thomas got away for the second time _. I’ve failed two times_. I’ve smashed a suspect’s face during an interrogation. I’ve endangered a civilian. I actually put an entire operation at risk, insulted the paramedics on site and had a row with my partner at a public hospital, in front of half of our squad.” He risked looking at her and she saw the worry and sadness in his eyes.  “It would be a miracle if I still remain detective as it is. They will probably call me to demand explanations very soon.”

“Tell them you are sorry; tell them it won’t happen again.” She offered.

“I can’t, Swan.” He replied sighing and averting his eyes again, running his hand through his hair.

“ _Why_?”

He looked at her with pained determination. “Because I’d do it again it a heartbeat, love.” _You look at me and I cave, Swan._

He looked away again. She looked at him and thought about everything he’d sacrificed for her. Everything he was still willing to sacrifice for her. She remembered his words on the night she found out about the Jolly Roger.

_When I asked you to stay, it was never about the things I’d done or that I would do for you. It was about the things you’d want to do for me._

She couldn’t let him. Not this time. She didn’t even have to think about it. The decision flew through her like her magic used to do, making her feel warm and safe. She slowly got up and walked towards him, kneeling next to him and her hand lifted his chin, forcing him to look at her.

“I’m backing off.” She stated firmly and he looked at her in shock. She looked at him determined. “It’s for the best, Killian. You were right… you don’t need _distractions_. You have to focus on getting this psycho and make it to captain. _You deserve this new life you’ve built_. You deserve your happy ending.” She took a deep breath before going on. “And I’ll do anything I can to give it to you and right now, it means me staying away from this investigation.” She looked at him, longing and regret in her eyes. “I’m the Savior, after all. I’m meant to do this, remember? Bring back the happy endings.” She smiled sadly and caressed his cheek before standing up sighing deeply. “Go get him, Hook.”

She headed for the door, trying to fight the tears in her eyes.

“Swan…” He called for her and she turned around. He looked at her whimsically “Do you ever wonder _what could have been_ if you hadn’t left me chained in there? At the beanstalk?”

“Yes.” She replied.

“And?” He asked hopeful.

“It’s like a fairytale: the pirate helps the princess return to her son and gives up his revenge for her. He helps her open up to love again. They conquer all obstacles together and they live happily ever after, with little pirates and princesses of their own.” She smiled with tears in her eyes.

“It’s a beautiful tale, Swan.” He sighed, still not able to take a chance again. “Too bad it’s too late.”

“I know… Just, don’t be a stranger, Killian. I – _I missed you_ these past three years, even if I couldn’t admit it to myself. I still miss you.” She looked at him with longing in her eyes. “I’ll always miss you.” _You are home._

She opened the door and left the office, leaving him, unaware of the inner fight she’d just ignited in him.

 

Emma was trying and failing on controlling the tears that were falling on her cheeks as she left the office. She walked a few steps and rested against the wall.

“Emma, are you ok?” Mac approached her and asked concerned.

“I’m backing off, Mac.” She said and then she looked at him determined. “Make sure he makes it to captain.”

“I will.” Mac nodded. “Emma, you don’t have to back off…” He started but she cut him off.

“Yes I have to. Just promise me you’ll be there for him.” She took a deep breath. “Promise – promise me you’ll convince him to find someone who makes him happy.”

“He doesn’t want to find someone, Emma.” Mac sighed.

She remembered Killian’s words. _She made me happy, happier that I’ve been in centuries._

“He deserves to be happy. Just…” She choked on the words but pushed herself to say them, more tears coming to her eyes… “Convince him to give Rebecca another chance.”

“Emma, that is really…” Mac started but Emma raised her hand, unable to hold back her sobs.

“ _Promise me_ , Mac.” She pleaded, openly crying.

“I promise.” Mac said.

 

Killian sat in the office, lost in his own thoughts. He didn’t notice the door opening.

“Are you going to let her go?” Mac asked him in a determined tone.

“I’m done chasing that woman.” Killian said trying to convince himself.

“No, you are not.” Mac hit the desk with his fist, forcing Killian to look at him. “Killian, I won’t pretend to know what went on with you two and I know there’s more to your life story than what you’ve told me. Frankly, I don’t care what it is. You are my partner and you’ve had my back from the day we first met. And I have yours. As your partner, as your _friend_ , I can tell you this: you are not done chasing that woman. I’ve known you for three years, Killian, and I’ve never seen you look at any woman the way you look at her. Not even Rebecca. _Not even close_. Also, I’ve never seen you as alive as when you are with her. She’s backing off from this investigation for you, mate. The way I see it, you have two choices: you can stay sulking in this office, put Thomas behind bars, become captain and go back alone to your house every night. Or you can go after her, put Thomas behind bars, become captain and perhaps go home every night _to her_. Which one is going to be?”

Killian looked at his friend for one more second before quickly standing up and reaching for the door.

He stepped down the station looking frantically and he saw her, only a few feet away.

“Swan!” He yelled after her as he sprinted in her direction.

She froze on the spot and her hands reached to her face, wiping the tears before she turned around and meet him. He was breathing heavily, his blue eyes looking at her with a mix of hope and anticipation.

“After you ran away, did you really miss _me_?” He asked, his voice thick with emotion.

“Everyday…” She whispered, finally accepting the truth she’d been denying to herself so many years.

His hand cupped her face and he brought her lips to his, kissing her slowly but with such intensity that she felt her knees tremble. She put her arms around his shoulders, her hand caressing the nape of his neck, her fingers weaving in his hair. He pushed her slowly against the wall, never breaking the kiss. When he finally broke away from her lips, he pressed his forehead to hers.

“Have dinner with me tonight.” He asked breathlessly.

“Are you asking me out?” She asked, her voice a mix of hope and surprise.

“I am. I’m asking you out on a date, Swan.” He looked at her, a soft smile in his lips. “Let’s give this, _us_ , a _real_ _chance_ this time.” He looked at her with hope in his impossible blue eyes. “Would you go out with me?”

“Yes.” She said with a smile that reached all the way to her eyes.

“I’ll pick you up at 8.” He whispered against her lips before diving in for another passionate kiss.

She could hear the whistles from the officers in front of the building. He broke the kiss and nuzzled his nose against hers.

“I better get back to work.” He looked at her, a huge goofy grin on his face. “See you tonight, Swan.”

 

Mac was waiting expectantly when Killian returned to his desk.

“So?” Mac asked impatiently.

“I have a date tonight.” Killian grinned.

“A date? After my fantastic speech and you running after her like you were the lead in a romantic movie all you got was a _date_?” Mac couldn’t believe his ears.

“Trust me, mate. It’s all I need.” Killian answered smugly.

Mac sighed. “Why do I even bother with you?”

“Does it help if I tell you I asked her out in between kisses?”

“Yes, see? That is the Killian Jones we all know and love.” Mac smirked.

“I need to talk to Laura’s cousin.” Killian said suddenly.

“Joey? Why would you want to talk to Joey? Are you going to bring cannoli to the date?” Mac asked confused.

“Not Joey. Vinnie.” Killian rectified. “Give me his number.” Mac wrote the number and handed it to Killian, who dialed immediately.  “Vinnie? It’s Killian. Alright, listen to me, mate. I have a date tonight and it’s very, _very_ important. This is what I need you to do today and tomorrow morning.” He started to give directions quickly and then hung up.

Mac looked at him amused.

“Ok… now that you _finally_ sorted your personal life, can we get back to work and get this asshole once and for all?” He raised his eyebrow at Killian.

“Aye, mate.” Killian smiled.


	26. The Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am not very good at romantic/fluff stuff, so bear with me!

_I'll be there for you_  
 _These five words I swear to you_  
 _When you breathe I want to be the air for you_  
**I’ll be there for you, Bon Jovi**

Emma finished the last touches to her light make up and looked at herself in the mirror. She was wearing a black skirt and a green blouse and she tried to calm her shaking hands.

_It’s just a date._

_With Killian._

_After you finally admitted to him that you missed him the last three years._

_And you agreed to finally give this a chance._

_After you admitted that your idea of a fairytale happy ending involved having little pirates and princesses with him._

She took a deep breath.

_It’s just a date._

She heard a knock on the door and her stomach did a funny twist. She straightened herself and went to get the door, running into Henry who was sitting on the living room. He gave her a thumbs up.

“You look great, Mom.” He said encouragingly.

She smiled and opened the door. And then her jaw dropped at the sight of him. He was wearing black fitted pants, a blue shirt and a grey vest. His leather jacket was on his left arm and he was holding a bouquet of peonies on his right hand. His eyes lit up with utter awe when he saw her.

“You look stunning, Swan.” He said looking at her dazed.

“You look…” She trailed off.

“I know.” He smirked at her and she rolled her eyes. He handed her the flowers. “For you.”

She took the flowers and smiled, biting her lower lip. “I’ll go put these in water.” She said. “I’ll be right back”.

He smiled at her and entered the hallway to wait for her.

Henry walked towards him. “Hi Killian.” He said.

“Henry, lad.” Killian shifted his stance and smiled at the boy. He scratched his ear and looked at Henry almost apologetically, “You are ok with this? I mean, me and you mom…” He trailed off, nervously.

Henry smirked. “Killian, I’ve been ok with this for the past three years. You were the ones that needed to catch up.” He replied.

Killian smiled sheepishly at Henry and then his eyes focused on Emma who was coming back their way.

“Everything ok?” She asked.

“Yes.” Henry said. “Have fun you two.” He waved before leaving for his room.

“Shall we?” Killian asked and Emma nodded smiling. His hand went to her lower back the moment she walked next to him, guiding her out of the apartment door. The moment she closed the door and turned around, she bumped into him. He pressed her against the door, his hand next to her face. He had a devilish smirk on his face.

“I know it’s customary to wait until the end of the date, but I don’t think I can resist that long.” He said as he cupped her face with his hand and brought her to him, kissing her slowly and deeply. “Hi, Swan.” He whispered sighing when he pulled away a little, brushing his nose against hers. She leaned in to kiss him again, a little longer this time. “Hi, Killian.” She replied smiling.

He pulled away and held her hand in his as they started walking. When they reached the front door stairs, she pulled him towards her and kissed him longingly, her free hand pressing into his back to push him against her. She broke the kiss with a smirk at his dazed look.

“You told me once not to stand on ceremony. I’m taking you up on it.” She said smugly.

“I like that… But what took you so long, love?” He whispered in her ear.

“I can be stubborn.”

“Don’t I know it.” He said before kissing her again. When they finally broke the kiss, he cleared his throat, “We should go before we miss our reservation.”

He took her to a small Italian restaurant nearby the river. The environment was warm and enchanting and she admired the scenery.

“This is nice.” She said. “Do you like Italian food?” She asked him.

“I love it. It’s pretty much all I eat.” He confessed. “This place was highly recommended. They told me they make some excellent pasta carbonara.” He smiled at her, his hand reaching hers over the table. “Do you want some wine?” He asked. “I don’t like to drink when I’m driving, but you should order some if you wish.” He said.

“I suppose it makes sense that a cop doesn’t drink and drive.” She commented. “Lead by example and all that…”

“And in fair honesty, Swan, I do drive one-handed. There is no need to numb my reflexes and put myself or anyone inside my car at risk. “

She looked at him impressed and he smiled sheepishly. He would have scratched his head behind his ear, but his hand was holding hers and he did not want to let go. He never want to let go again.

“So…” She said after they’d ordered and she’d taken a sip of her water. “What is your story, Detective Jones?” She raised an eyebrow at him. “How did a man with a distinct accent like yours end up working as a police detective in New Jersey?”

“You want to know my tale to the world, Swan?” He asked and she nodded. “Alright, here it is: I was born here but moved to Ireland with my mother and brother when I was a lad. My mother died and I was raised by Liam, until he died in an accident. I decided to move back here and become a police detective. I was in a relationship for several years, with Milah, until she died in a violent crime, where I also lost my hand. I took some time away from the force after that, doing mainly private investigation work in Maine.” He smiled at her at this point and she nodded. “But a few years back I decided to join back the force and continue my work in homicide and brutal crimes.” He sighed. “As you can see, most of the main elements are still there, but the tale is just a little different. What about you? David is your older brother?” He asked.

She nodded. “We were separated as kids in the foster system, which is why we don’t share the same name. We found each other a few years back and rekindled our family. The other pieces remain the same: I gave up Henry, he found me when he was eleven and his adoptive mother decided to share custody of him.” She sighed. “You know, there are always a lot of loopholes we have to sort out but…”

“But you just smile dashingly and divert the subject…” He said. “Works every time.” He smirked and she laughed sincerely.

The rest of the dinner was spent between talking about how he accommodated to the new world and his new job and her story on how she rekindled her work as bail bondsperson, the last few years and the new case she got assigned that afternoon. Once dinner was finished, he asked her to take a walk down the river with him. As they were walking he grabbed her hand in his and intertwined his fingers with hers.

“Have you ever gone back?” He asked looking at her, “To Storybrooke?”

She shook her head, “David and Mary Margaret go there from time to time to visit Granny, Ruby and the dwarves, but I never really felt the need.” She hesitated. “After I found out you left, there- there was nothing left for me there anymore.”

He raised their intertwined hands to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to her hand and smiled.

“But everything remains pretty much the same, other than Belle leaving Gold, there aren’t many changes.” She said.

He froze on the spot. “Belle left the Dark One? Why?”

“She found out he was lying to her about the dagger and divorced him. She’s actually dating one or Robin’s men, Will Scarlett.” She realized Killian was looking at her with dread in his eyes. “Killian, what is it?” She asked concerned.

“The Dark One doesn’t take it well when his women leave him, Emma…” He stated, worry and pain etched on his face. “Belle might be in danger. Same for the bloke she’s dating.”

She reached to him, her hands holding his arms, comforting him. “I know.” She said. “That’s why Regina put a protective spell on them while they were in town and we convinced them to leave as soon as possible. Gold’s magic doesn’t work outside Storybrooke, Killian. They’ve been living in Boston for more than a year now. _They are safe_. I have friends up there they can go to if needed.” She assured him.

He gave her a small smile, “Sorry, love. It’s just…” He trailed off, his eyes dwelling.

She hugged him tightly, her hands cradling his head. “I know, Killian. I know.” She conveyed.

He pulled away after a few moments, clearing his throat. “I have a few friends in the Boston Police Department. I’ll make a few calls tomorrow as well. If he tries something, I’ll make sure he’s locked up for good.” He looked at her and his eyes tried to explain his worry. “It’s not vengeance, Emma. I’m past that. It’s _justice_.”

She nodded as she grabbed his hand again and they resumed their walk.  A few moments later, he reached out to embrace her. “I’m sorry if I overreacted, Swan. I’m glad I’m here with you tonight, Emma. You know that, don’t you, lass?” He whispered in her ear, trying to make her understand that while the past would always haunt him, he was ready to move on. He’d been ready to move on for years.

“I know…” She said. “You don’t have to apologize, Killian. There is nothing to be sorry about being worried for someone’s wellbeing, especially after you went through yourself.” She looked at him, reassurance in her eyes.

He pulled her for a kiss, his hands grasping her hips as he pulled her to him, walking backwards until they bumped into a wall. He kissed her long and deep, and she responded in the same way, her hand caressing his back, pulling him closer to her.

“Killian…” She whispered in between kisses. “Henry is at my place tonight, so we might want to go back to yours…” She trailed off as he broke the kisses he was planting on her neck and looked at her mischievously.

“Swan, I have no intention of taking you back to my place tonight.” He said seriously and she looked at him dumbfounded. “Love, I will be a perfect gentleman and take you back to your house after our date is finished. I’m going to take this slow…”

“Slow?” She asked incredulously. “Your hand is almost on my ass and you have me pressed against a wall, Killian.” She raised her eyebrow at him.

He chuckled. “Ok.” He whispered as he brushed his lips against hers. _“Slower_ than usual.”

“Captain Hook wants to take it slow?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

_“No_. Killian Jones has finally managed to get a date with the woman he’s pined over for years and he wants to enjoy every single step of how this unfolds. We’ve never had a chance to do this before, Swan. Don’t you want to just enjoy this adventure?” He asked, a pleading look in his blue eyes and she smiled shyly at him.

“I suppose we could have just a first date…” She conceded.

He wrapped her into his arms. “I am, however, going to kiss you every single chance I get, in every way I can.” He stated.

“Really?” She teased.

“I have centuries of experience, love. I’m a magnificent kisser.” He said matter-of-factly before pulling her into a kiss again.

He kissed her slowly, tenderly, almost shyly. “That’s how Lieutenant Killian Jones from the Royal Navy kisses, your highness.” He said as he pulled away and took her hand to continue their walk by the river.

“Besides,” He continued, “I didn’t think you were the type that pillages and plunders on the first date.”

“I’m not…” She confirmed. “But you are quite irresistible, Lieutenant. And I am very fond of _how you pillage and plunder_.” She said seductively.

He was crushing her lips at the very same instant: taking by assault, demanding, grabbing, claiming, possessing. His hand was tugging her hair, pulling her closer to him, his mouth hot against hers leaving her breathless and dazzle-minded.

“That is how Captain Hook kisses, Savior.” He spoke breathlessly when he broke the kiss. He looked wrecked, dazzled. She felt the same way; she had never felt like this before. She had no words to describe the turmoil that last kiss had ignited on her.

“I don’t think it ever felt like that before with anyone. _Ever_.” She said honestly.

“For me either.” He confessed as he tried to catch his breath. “Let’s do it again.” He grinned with a boyish look on his face before leaning in and plundering her mouth again. And again. And again.

When they finally reached the front door of her building, he looked at her with dreamy eyes, pulling her softly towards him, his hands on her waist, holding her. He leaned in and captured her lips softly in his, moving slowly, with determination. He deepened the kiss and his tongue searched for hers, tangling and dancing slowly and accurately, leaving her feeling butterflies in her stomach and many other things all over her body.

“That is how Detective Killian Jones kisses, Emma.” He said as he gave her a final peck and looked at her with his eyes full of adoration. “So tell me, which one you prefer, Swan?” He asked playfully.

“I refuse to choose… can I have them all?” She replied biting her lower lip.

“Your wish is my command, princess.” He said before trapping her in another long, lustful kiss.

When they finally pulled away, she looked at him, her lips swollen and her green eyes bright with happiness.

“Killian, will you go out with me again?” She asked smiling, showing him she wanted this as much he wanted it, taking the next step and asking him to be with her again.

“I was hoping you’d say that, Swan.” He leaned in and kissed her softly, capturing her bottom lip in between his.

“Goodnight, love.” He whispered against her lips before finally pulling away, taking all his self-control to do it.

“Goodnight, Killian.” She smiled at him.


	27. The Make Out Session

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know... this chapter is really not necessary. It does not move the plot much (only for a couple of points) but I just really wanted to write it.

_Watching every motion_   
_In my foolish lover's game_   
_On this endless ocean_   
_Finally lovers know no shame_

_Turning and returning_   
_To some secret place inside_   
_Watching in slow motion_   
_As you turn around and say_

_Take my breath away_  
**Take my breath away, Berlin**

Emma Swan woke up to the sound of knocks on her front door. She padded towards the door and she opened it. There was a delivery guy smiling at her. He was in his thirties, with dark hair and olive skin. “I have a delivery for Emma Swan,” He said cheerfully as he handed her a huge bouquet of forget-me-nots and a brown package. “Have a nice day, sweetheart.” He winked at her as he turned around and left.

She closed the apartment door balancing the flowers and the package and she headed for the kitchen, looking for a card. She found a small parchment that she rolled out to see some beautiful, old style writing:

_I have it on literary authority that these will remind you of the color of my eyes._  
I had a great time last night. Looking forward to our next date, Swan. Yours, Killian.  
PS: Enjoy the cannoli on the stakeout for your new case.

She rolled her eyes and smiled like a goof at the same time. She unwrapped the package to find a dozen cannoli carefully and neatly placed in a box.

“Hey kid!” She called to Henry. “Do you want to have cannoli for breakfast?” She asked as she went to find a spare vase for the flowers and she placed the forget-me-nots on the kitchen, her gaze going to the peonies that were already sitting on the living room. She couldn’t erase the grin that was plastered on her face as she went to make coffee.

Killian entered the office with a cup of coffee on his hand and a smile plastered on his face. Mac was on the phone and he smiled and motioned for him.

“It’s Vinnie. He’s saying that Emma is striking and he’s asking if he can have a shot after you break up with her…” It was all he could say before Killian had placed the cup of coffee on the desk and had snatched the phone away from Mac’s hand, speaking in a threatening tone.

“Listen to me, Vinnie. Do not even _think_ of flirting with her. She’s taken, mate. I’ve waited years, _years_ , for her.” _Centuries actually,_ he thought.“I will lock you up in jail, do you understand me? ….. No, it won’t be police brutality because I’ll frame you. …… I _can_ and I _will_ frame you. This is the love of my life, Vinnie. _Stay away._ ” He said before hanging up, huffing.

“The love of your life, sunshine?” Mac raised an eyebrow at him, a mischievous smirk plastered on his face.

“Don’t tell me you haven’t figured that one out, Detective Sanders.” Killian retorted.

“It’s always nice when they finally confess.” Mac smirked at him. “Vinnie will stay away, I promise.”

Killian’s phone beeped with the sound of an incoming text.

_E: Forget-me-nots? Have you been reading Peter Pan?_

He typed in his reply.

_K: That thing is the most despicable lie ever written. Except for the part about my eyes._

_E: Thank you for the cannoli. They will be appreciated later tonight on my stakeout. What are you up to tonight?_

_K: Since I cannot spend the evening with you, my fair lass; I’m going to have some drinks with the guys after work._

_E: Have fun. Tell Mac and the rest I said hi._

_K: I will. Good luck on the stakeout, Swan. Catch the guy quickly so we can go out again._

_E: I will._

Killian stared at his phone with a goofy grin for a few moments, before lifting his eyes to find Mac looking at him with a knowing smile. “What?” Killian asked but Mac just shrugged and shook his head.

 

Later that afternoon, Emma entered her apartment with the box of cannoli under her arm. It had taken less than expected to catch the guy that was her new case and she actually had the entire evening free instead of having to sit in her car drinking coffee and eating cannoli. Mary Margaret smiled confused at her.

“I thought you had a stakeout?” She asked as David joined them, carrying the little prince asleep on his arms.

“I caught the guy already.” Emma smirked. “Cannoli, anyone?” She smiled as she left the package on the kitchen counter and took a moment to touch the flowers sitting there.

Mary Margaret shook her head. “So… how did it go last night?” She asked eagerly.

“No details, please.” David added and Emma smiled at him.

“It went well.” Emma said. “Really well.” She smiled as she leaned on the counter, getting lost in her thoughts.

Mary Margaret gave David a knowing look. _I told you so._ David shrugged his shoulders and gave her a pointed look. _Don’t get pushy and let them do this at their own pace._ Mary Margaret ignored him.

“So, will there be a second date?” She pressed and Emma rolled her eyes before looking at her mother. “Yes, there will be a second date.” She confirmed. “He would have taken me out tonight, but I had this case.”

“But you don’t have the case anymore…” Mary Margaret pressed. “Henry has already left for Regina’s; we will be heading home soon…”

“He already made plans with his colleagues.” Emma said.

“You can surprise him.” Mary Margaret said intently.

Emma shook her head but the thought of surprising him at the bar and spending time with him was appealing.

“Emma,” David said sighing, “I think it’s very clear to everyone that Hook would much rather spend time with you. He has shown you that in the past. And recently, taking into account that your apartment is flooded with flowers.  Perhaps, it might be time for you to show him that as well.” He smiled uncomfortably.

Emma looked at the flowers one more time before grabbing the keys and waving her parents goodbye.

 

Killian was sitting on the counter, nursing a beer and smiling to himself. Mac sat next to him.

“Don’t tell me that you miss her already…”Mac sighed as he drank his beer.

“Would that be a bad thing?” Killian asked. “It’s not that how you are supposed to feel when you are starting to date someone?”

“You have it bad, mate.” Mac replied.

“Don’t I know it.” Killian smiled. “Always have, always will.” He confirmed. “Besides, don’t tell me you did not feel this way when you started dating Laura.”

“Are you kidding me? I was ten times worse than you, Killian. I stopped by the bakery each day for a month with a cup of coffee for her before I even dared to ask her out. And then I stopped by the bakery each day for the next month with a cup of coffee after our first date. I still do it from time to time.” Mac smiled.

Killian sighed, “I like hanging out with you guys, don’t get me wrong, but…”

“But you’d rather be spending time with her…”Mac said as he watched how the front door opened and he smiled knowingly.

“Aye.” Killian said.

“Killian… turn around.” Mac said smiling.

Killian looked at him puzzled but he turned around. His eyes lit up in an instant.

“Swan…” He said as he stood up and went to Emma, who was standing there nervously.

She waved at him, biting her lower lip and thinking what to say when he reached her and pulled her into his arms, kissing her. When he pulled away, his eyes were sparkling and he had a beautiful smile plastered on his face.

“I thought you had a stakeout…” He said as he walked with her towards Mac, his arm on her waist, pulling her closer to him.

“I caught the guy already.” She smirked, “Can you believe the idiot went to the same strip club he was arrested last time, early in the afternoon?” She rolled her eyes.

“You are bloody brilliant, Swan.” He complimented her proudly as they reached the stool where he was sitting earlier, and he made her sit on it and he stood next to her, his arm never leaving her waist. Mac waved at her but it was clear that Emma only had eyes for Killian.

“You know, Killian, I think I’m going to leave you in better company.” Mac said as he grabbed his beer and stood up.

“Oh no… I don’t mean to interrupt…” Emma started embarrassed but Killian had already waved a hand at Mac without taking his eyes off of Emma. “See you later, Mac.” He said as he turned Emma around so she was facing him and he stood there in between her legs, leaning down to kiss her deeply.

And that is what they did. They kissed as she told him about her very quick case and he told her about the last raid he conducted; and he played with her hair and kissed her again, whispering how sexy she looked in those jeans. He was driving her insane and he knew it, enjoying teasing her a little, after claiming once again that he was going to take this slow. She thought about beating him at his own game.

“I have a confession to make…” She said in a velvety tone as she looked up at him.

“Do tell, Swan.” He smirked at her.

“You were incredibly _hot_ while interrogating that suspect. _Very hot_.” She whispered biting her lower lip.

“Even when I smashed his face?” He asked in a husky tone.

_“Especially_ when you smashed his face to defend my honor, _Hook_. You have no idea what a turn on that was…”She said as she pulled his hips closer to her and she pressed her thighs tighter against his legs.

His hands rested on her hips and he leaned in to capture her lips in a hot, wet kiss, his tongue dancing against hers, bringing goose bumps to the both of them.

“Are you trying to break my resolve, love?” He asked in a raspy voice.

“Is it working?” She replied.

He lowered his head so his eyes could meet hers and his lips were brushing against hers. “You’ll have to try harder.”

“Oh, I can make it _harder_.” She spoke into his ear as she bit his earlobe and had the satisfaction of making him moan.

“I’ll get you back on that one.” He almost groaned.

“Looking forward to it.” She said mischievously.

“Do you play pool, Swan?” He asked after taking a deep breath.

“Do you?”

“Come, love…” He said as he took her hand and made her stand up.

 

The pool table sat on the corner of the bar, and it was poorly lit and far away from where Killian’s squad was currently playing a game of darts.

“Do you want to open?” Emma asked as she picked a pool stick and applied some chalk on the tip.

“Ladies first…” Killian said as he picked his own stick and then moved to stand aside, with a clear view of Emma’s ass as she bent over the table. Yes, he felt like he was already winning.

She rolled her eyes and opened the game.

“Not bad, Swan.” He said as he approached her and looked at the table. He maneuvered the stick with his right hand, carefully setting his prosthetic hand on the table and hooking the stick underneath one of the fingers, before bending over and aiming carefully. It was Emma’s turn to admire how great Killian Jones looked in any type of tight pants. Granted, leather pants were her personal preference, but tight denims certainly had their appeal as well.

“Good form…” She commented after he’d make his shot.

He got closer to her, whispering in her ear, “Thank you, love. Your turn.” He said as he rested against a nearby chair and admired her legs blatantly.

“See something you like?” She asked as she was leaning over the pool table, raising an eyebrow at him. 

“Many things…” He said as he left his stick and walked towards her. He stood behind her and he slowly bent over as his hand travelled down her arm until he reached her hand and helped her grab the pool stick. His prosthetic hand was resting on her hip.

“What are you doing?” She asked breathlessly.

“You have _great form,_ Swan, but I thought you needed some help.” He whispered in her ear.

She swayed her hips, pressing further against him and he breathed deeply. “Right there I think it’s better don’t you think?” She said innocently.

“Swan, you are a bloody temptress.” He said in a strained voice.  

“You are the one that is currently pressing against me while I’m leaning over a pool table…” She replied before taking her shot.

He pulled away from her and went to the jukebox, inserting some coins and picking a song. The music started to sound softly and she smirked at him when she recognized the song.

“ _Take my breath away_? Smooth, Detective.” She said.

“I told you, I like 80s music.” He said as he went back to her, pulling her in his arms.

“I see…” She said as he leaned in and kissed her deeply, pressing her against the pool table, not really caring about messing up the game. His hands pressed her hips against the edge of the table and she rested there, as he pressed his body fully against hers, kissing her slowly, savoring each moment. Her hands move from his arms up to his neck, caressing his neck as she tilted her head and deepened the kiss shamelessly.

He pulled away from her mouth to trail soft kisses on her neck before looking at her with lustful happy eyes.

“I am having a _fantastic_ time. Thank you for the surprise visit, Swan.” He said smiling.

“I had to thank you for the flowers.” She replied smiling sexily at him.

“I should get you flowers more often then.” He whispered against her ear.

“I’m sorry I am keeping you away from your squad…”

“I’ve hung out with them for the past three years…” He said looking at her smiling as she pulled a strand of his dark hair away from his forehead.  “I honestly don’t care, and I don’t think they care either.” He smirked. He looked at her with hungry eyes again. “Now, where were we? Aye, I was about to kiss you.” He said in a husky tone.

“In a hurry, Lieutenant?” She said as she pulled away from him playfully, leaving him trailing with his mouth after her.

“You know, I _cannot wait_ for that promotion so you have to start calling me captain again.” He sighed devilishly.

“I never called you captain before.” She retorted playfully.

“True…” He smirked. “But you could start calling me that, don’t you think?” He looked at her with mischief in his eyes, tilting his head, “Try it out, see how it feels…”

_“Captain.”_

He groaned and pounced on her, kissing her hungrily, his hands pushing her hips even closer to him. “You have no idea how incredible that sounds, Swan.” He said breathlessly.

“I’m getting a _pretty good_ idea.” She whispered in his ear before nibbling it.

“Perhaps we should stop, love. We’ve already given them quite the show…”

“I don’t mind…” She said daringly.

“Bloody vixen…” He said tenderly as he leaned in to capture her lips with his one more time. Or a few more times. When they eventually pulled away from each other, he looked at her with a content look.

“It’s getting late,” He sighed. “I’ll walk you to your car and get a taxi for myself”.

“I could drive you home…” She offered trying to emulate his devilish smirk.

“Slow, remember?” He lifted his eyebrow playfully at her.

“I’ll just drive you, Killian. No worries, your _virtue_ will be _intact_.” She said playfully.

 

She pulled him towards her when they reached her car, kissing him slowly. He noticed her playful stare. “What are you up to, Swan?” He asked in a low voice.

"What happened with your modern life knowledge? You never heard of doing it on the backseat of a car?" She asked as she caressed his face.

"Swan, I will not take you on the backseat of your car. I have standards." He stated proudly.

"That doesn't mean we can’t have a little fun." She replied lifting her eyebrows and he smiled at her, his eyes full of light. He was _truly_ enjoying this side of her.

"True... but you do know that my entire squad is inside that bar right? I am not going to get caught on a compromising position..." He said.

"Where's your sense of adventure? You were a _pirate_." She teased him.

"I am trying to become police captain, Swan. I cannot be caught breaking the law with my pants down in the middle of the street." He said in a self-righteous tone and she pouted at him.

“Serves you right, Swan.” He softly poked her nose with his finger. “I wouldn’t have had a problem with all this three years ago.” He smirked at her and she rolled her eyes.

“Come on, I’ll drive you home.”

“Thank you, milady.”

 

When they finally reached his apartment, they both got out of the car. She reached out to give him a final goodbye kiss and he pulled her to him tightly, kissing her unabashedly.

“You know, Swan…” He said as he trailed kisses on her neck. “It’s quite dark in here.” He bit her earlobe.  “My squad is nowhere near.” He kissed down her throat, finding her collarbone.  “There are no police patrols in this area at this hour.” He said as he trailed her jaw with his lips.  “What do you say we give your idea of having a little fun a try?” He whispered against her lips as he opened the car door and gently pushed her inside and into the back seat while she laughed.

“Just to be clear, I’m still not taking you on the backseat of your car…” He said before climbing in next to her.


	28. Alone

_Till now I always got by on my own_  
 _I never really cared until I met you_  
 _And now it chills me to the bone_  
 _How do I get you alone_  
**Alone, Heart**

Emma Swan woke up again to the sound of knocks on her front door. She padded towards the door and she opened it to find the same guy as the day before. He winked as he handed her a bouquet of buttercups and a hot cocoa with cinnamon. “Have a nice day, sweetheart.” He said and left, not giving her time to tip him.

Another parchment was attached to the flowers.

_Thank you for a lovely evening, Swan. Yours, Killian.  
PS: I hope you like buttercups, princess. _

She smiled as she sipped her cocoa.

It was almost impossible for Killian and Emma to find time together for several days. She had a new case that involved late night stakeouts and time outside the city and he was still embarked on his quest to get Thomas, pulling double shifts of his own on the weekend. They did try to spend time together as he accompanied her one night to her stakeout, only to find out there were doing a poor job of actually keeping an eye on the house as they were busy whispering sweet nothings at each other and sharing heated kisses.

He sent her flowers each morning and Emma would wake up to the same delivery guy winking at her carrying a bouquet of yellow roses, or calla lilies. She did not have enough place in her apartment, but she continued to purchase vases to put the flowers in, smiling each time her eyes saw them or re read the little parchments with silly notes he’d sent her.

Killian smiled as he looked at his phone screen on Thursday afternoon. Mac looked at him.

“Good news?” He asked.

“Emma caught the guy. _Finally_.” Killian said proudly.

“Does this mean you are finally going to get your third date?” Mac asked smiling. “You know what they say about third dates.”

Killian scratched behind his ear, clearly nervous at the prospect. “I don’t know, mate.” He sighed. “I don’t want to rush into anything.”

Mac raised an eyebrow at him, “Killian, taking things slow is just bullshit when it comes to the two of you and you know it. What is it? Why are you holding back?” He looked at Killian intently and then sighed. “You think she’s going to run away from you again?”

Killian fell silent as he averted his eyes. Mac sighed again, running a hand through his hair, “Killian, she went to find you at a bar and let you pretty much grope her in front of your entire squad. Whatever happened in the past, I can assure you, she has no intentions of running away from you. She’s as gone as you are, mate.”

Killian looked at him confused. Mac smirked at him. “Ask Vinnie. He says she giggles everytime she gets your flowers.”

“Emma Swan doesn’t giggle.” Killian said.

“Apparently, when it comes to you, she _does_.” Mac replied.

Killian pondered for a second before looking at Mac, “I think I need to talk to your wife.” He said cryptically.

 

The next morning, Emma opened the door to find the delivery guy holding a bouquet of red roses with a small parchment tied to it.

_Have dinner with me tonight? My place, 8.30? Yours, Killian_

Killian’s phone beeped and he smiled as he read the text.

_E: I’ll be there._

She knocked on his door at 8.30, holding a bottle of red wine and trying not to be nervous about the dinner. But all her thoughts vanished when he answered the door barefoot, wearing faded jeans and a green t-shirt. She was suddenly glad she had not dressed up and opted for comfortable jeans, a blue sweater and black boots. But it was the sight of his left arm what had her smiling.

“I was wondering where that had gone.” She said as she pointed to his old brace and his hook.

He blushed, scratching behind his ear as he let her into the apartment. “I hope you don’t mind.” He said sheepishly. “Sometimes it’s more comfortable to use around the house. The hand is great, but I’ve been using this for centuries…” He trailed off, slightly embarrassed and she got closer, grabbing his hook and pulling him to her for a welcoming kiss, placing his hook at her lower back.

“I’ve actually missed it…” She confessed smiling at him, “And I’ve missed _you_.” She said and he smiled at her and leaned into another kiss.

“Come in, Swan.” He said as he grabbed her hand, “Dinner is almost ready.” He said as they walked into his kitchen.

He had set up a couple of plates on the kitchen aisle, a lit candle and a single red rose in the tall vase sitting in the middle. There was a basket of bread and a delicious smell coming from the stove.

“That smells great.” She said as she removed her jacket. “Can I help?”

“Do you want to open the wine and pour us a glass? I have it covered here.” He said. “There’s garlic bread on the basket if you want some.”

“You made garlic bread?” She asked marveled as she opened the wine and poured them both a glass. “Can you actually _cook_?” She said as she handed him a glass and took a sip of the other one.

“Heavens, no.” He said. “You can thank Laura, Mac’s wife, for all of this. She and her grandmother Maria, actually made the bread, the sea fish salsa that is heating over there and the tiramisu we’ll have for dessert.” He admitted taking a sip from his wine. “I only had to make the pasta and put this all together.” He motioned with his hook, a goofy grin on his face.

“You said that Mac’s wife’s grandmother did this?” Emma asked with a confused look. “What did I miss?”

He smirked, “Remember on our first date when I said Italian food is pretty much all I eat?” She nodded and he went to his fridge, opening the freezer compartment to show it full of neatly ordered packages. “That’s because Laura and her family have been feeding me for years.” He confessed. “When I arrived here and they found out I had no family, they kind of took me under their protection. They own the bakery and a couple of other places here in town and they kept inviting me over to their family meetings on the weekends and their reunions and it just happened.”

She was listening intently and trying to make sense of it. “So what you are trying to say is…”

He looked at her biting his lower lip. “I kind of have an extended Italian family, Swan.” He smirked. “One that is actually _very keen_ on meeting you this Sunday.”

His phone beeped and he checked it, moving to the stove afterwards to pour pasta over one of the pans. He set the phone next to the counter and looked at her.

“Sunday?” She asked.

“Yes… for our, erm, their Sunday family meeting. We meet at Maria’s house after church for lunch.”

“You go to church on Sundays?!?” Emma almost choked on the wine.

He looked at her between amused and enraged. “Swan, of course I don’t. Even I know when _it’s too much_. I have gone for special celebrations, like weddings and first communions, but you and I both know that there are not enough rosaries I can pray in a lifetime to get repentance from my previous sins.” He sighed. His phone beeped again and he checked it, and he moved to stir the pasta that was boiling.

Emma tried again to make sense of the information she had just heard. “Ok, so these people, Mac’s family...”

“Mac’s wife’s family, Laura.” Killian corrected.

“Ok, Laura’s family… they want to meet _me_? ”

“Well, when I called Laura to ask her for help with dinner for tonight and she told her grandmother that I was dating someone, they wanted to meet you and they asked me to take you on Sunday. And Henry, of course.” He looked at her conflicted. “Emma, if this is too much, I can tell them off, it’s just…”

She smiled at him. “You want me to meet them…” She realized then that whatever this thing on Sunday was, it was important for him. She sighed. “I’ll have to talk to Regina about Henry, because it’s her weekend with him, but I’d love to go.”

His phone beeped again and Emma lost it. “ _What the hell is that_?!”

Killian smiled, “Oh, that is Laura, she’s texting me the instructions for finishing dinner.” He said before he removed the pasta from the hot water and poured it over the salsa, stirring carefully.

"Come on, you are just boiling the pasta, you don't need a step by step walk-through for that." Emma said and Killian gave her a very serious look.

"Trust me, Swan, there is no more major crime than overcooking the pasta for this family."

“I’m starting to feel nervous about Sunday.” Emma joked.

“Get Henry to come, it might help with your case…” He said. “I forgot to mention… they are _very protective_ of me.” He smirked as he laid down the plates in front of them. “And now, let’s eat, love.”

Dinner turned out to be a delicious, romantic experience for the both of them, especially when he brought up the dessert along with coffee and they just kissed all the way through it. She helped him with the dishes and they finally sat on his couch, his hand caressing her hair before moving to tickle her side. She hit his hand playfully, “Stop it, Hook!” She said before she realized it. Something went through his eyes but he hid it soon enough. She still looked at him wondering.

“Does it bother you?” She asked earnestly. “That I call you Hook sometimes?”

“Not anymore.” He replied sincerely as he pulled her to him, caressing her face. “It used to… when I thought it was all you could see of me.”

“You know that it’s not all that I see, right Killian?” She asked.

“I know…” He said, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. “I know now that you do see me, Swan. So I don’t have a problem with it.” He pulled a little to smile at her.  “You can call me anything you want, darling. _Dashing rapscallion sex god_ will be my preference, if you are interested…” He joked and she rolled her eyes at him before pulling him to her and kissing him. He kissed her back with passion, his hand caressing her face.

Still, she could feel something was off, but she could not pinpoint what it was. He had invited her to his place and they were enjoying a nice quiet time together on his couch, but he was still not moving forward. It was almost as if he was… _holding back_.

She pulled away from him, her hand caressing his face. “Killian…” She started. “This is not just about taking it slow, is it? We’ve done this before but it’s seems like… you’re holding back.” She said and he averted his eyes. “Killian…” She pleaded, “ _Talk to me._ ”

“Swan, I – It’s not the same as before. You and I, we are dating now. I – I have _feelings_ for you Emma. _Deep feelings_.” He sighed, trying to find a way to express himself. But he didn’t have to. She could see it in his face. He was afraid she’d run away if he said too much, showed too much, too soon. She’d run away from him so many times that his first instinct was to hold back. And it broke her heart.

“Killian…” She whispered. “I’m here. I won’t go anywhere, not anymore. I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this point and I understand that your first instinct is to hold back because you’re afraid I might get scared but…  I don’t want you to hold back, ever again. I might - I might not be able to express many things, Killian, but that does not mean I don’t _feel_ them.”  She said, her hand holding his hand and hook tightly as she reached for him.

She kissed him slowly, deeply, trying to convey her feelings on her kiss. Her need for him, for all of him: his feelings, his strength, his security. She tried to be the same for him.

“I- I don’t just _want_ you… Killian.” She started. “I want to be with you… I- I want to wake up next to you and have breakfast together. I want to crawl next to you on the couch at night while we talk--” and that was as far as she could go because he had crushed his lips to hers, pulling her closer to him until she was sitting on his lap. She kissed him back as she moved her legs to straddle him, holding him closer to her. It was intoxicating, his scent, his presence, his passion. _Him_. But what was more intoxicating was how free she felt, how unafraid she was to show him what she wanted to have with him, what she had finally given the chance to daydream. _A happy future. With him._

“I want to go sailing with you.” She whispered in his ear as she bit his earlobe and she felt him tense underneath her. She smiled as she ground her hips against his, enjoying the feeling.

“I want to listen to how your day went; I want to tell you about my day…” She said as she trailed kisses down his jawline and he gasped, his hand reaching behind her shirt to caress her bare skin, leaving a hot trail wherever his fingertips had been. His hook pressed against her lower back, pulling her even closer to him.

“Gods, Emma, don’t stop.” He growled. “Please don’t stop.”

“I want you to make love to me each night…” She said against his lips before kissing him slowly, her body moving rhythmically with his.

He broke the kiss, and looked up at her, his blue eyes dark with lust but bright with hope and adoration.  He was letting her in and it was mesmerizing. She wanted to get lost in his eyes and never come back.

“Swan…”He whispered, his eyes a promise of a different morning for the both of them, for the lost boys that had spent too much time in the shadows of loneliness and had finally found the light in each other.  “Stay with me tonight…” He asked, he pleaded, he offered, he invited her to be part of something. _Their_ something.

“Yes.” She vowed and his hand reached for her face, bringing her down to seal that vow with a kiss.

“Let’s move this to the bedroom, love.” He smirked and she disentangled herself from him. The moment he was standing, he had grabbed her thighs again and pulled her to him, scooping her in his arms, embracing her tightly as her legs wrapped around his waist, her hands caressing his broad shoulders. He trailed kisses along her neck as he walked them to the bedroom.

“When I first saw you,” He whispered against her neck, “When you pulled me out of those bodies, the first thing that came to my mind was how beautiful your green eyes were… like the reflection of the sun on high seas.” He said as he carefully put her on the bed and his body hovered over hers, pressing her against the mattress. “You’re so bloody beautiful, Emma. It’s impossible not to look at you and be entranced by you.” He kissed her fervently, his mouth moving against hers, his hand pressing her hips towards his hips. “That is why you bested me, love. I was so captivated by you, I couldn’t even speak, let alone _lie_.” He trailed kisses along her neck, her throat, her collarbone.

“I also kept that scarf because the way you tied it with your mouth drove me insane.” She whispered as her hand lifted his shirt to take it off. He broke his kisses long enough to remove his shirt and then looked at her, his lustful eyes igniting a fire underneath her skin. “I wanted you to look at me like that while stripping me out of my clothes…” She confessed and his eyes darkened before a smirk appeared on his face.

“That can be arranged, love.” He said as he lifted her from the bed to remove her sweater and shirt, his eyes never leaving hers and then he went lower and lower, his eyes still on her as he slowly removed her pants, tugging them with his hand, hook and mouth.

When he finally reached her face again, after moving back slowly, leaving kiss trails all along her body, he asked, his voice broken with lust. “Like that?”

She brought his face to hers, kissing him deeply, reaching to get rid of the remainder of their clothes.

“I wanted you to look at me like that while thrusting and pushing harder and faster inside of me.” She whispered in his ear.  

“Swan…” He groaned “Do you have any idea what you are doing to me, lass?” He asked, his eyes as dark as the night.

“The same you are doing to me…” She replied before her hands pulled him to her one more time, finally ready to commit to _them_.  “Make love to me, Killian.” She whispered against his lips and it was everything he needed to hear.

Late that night, as he kept her close to him, his arms embracing her tightly, his mouth pressing soft kisses on her shoulder blade, he dare to whisper his deepest desire.

“Stay forever?”

“I think I will.” She said as she turned her head around to capture his lips in a kiss, before settling herself to sleep in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not sure when I'll be able to update again. Work is getting very hectic


	29. True Colors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for your patience. Updates to the main fic will take longer, but I will be posting a few "deleted scenes" in between updates so I hope that helps. There is actually one piece I really love!  
> Comments really light up my day... so feel free to drop a quick not with what you liked!

_But I see your true colors_   
_Shining through_   
_I see your true colors_   
_And that's why I love you_   
_So don't be afraid to let them show  
_ **True Colors, Phil Collins**

He woke up in the middle of the night when she started to trail kisses over his bare chest. His first thought was that he was dreaming, that it was most definitely the best dream he ever had; but when she reached lower to take him into her mouth, he knew no dream would ever feel as good as this. He pulled her back into his arms and flipped them over, trailing kisses in her neck. He made love to her slowly and lazily, enjoying how it felt to hold her close to him and give himself to her without any restraints. He whispered sweet words into her ear and watched her come undone in his arms. He’d never seen anything more beautiful in his long life.

He brought her into his arms, keeping her close to him. “I don’t think I’ll let you leave my bed again, Swan.” He said, his voice hoarse from sleep and afterglow.

“Good.” She replied, her hand caressing his chest. “Because I don’t plan to go anywhere…”

He drifted awake early, as he always did. Old habits die hard, after all, and centuries spent at sea had made him an early morning person. He looked at Emma sleeping peacefully and he decided he could stay in bed just a little while longer, looking at her sleeping form. It was about an hour before Emma started stirring and looked at him with sleepy eyes.

“Good morning,” He said, his hand caressing her hair while he leaned in to capture her lips in a soft kiss.

“Hey, how long have you been awake?” She asked.

“A while… I thought about getting up and starting breakfast but I-I  just…” He trailed off, his eyes looking at her earnestly, “I just didn’t want you to wake up and think, even for a second, that I had left.” He finished, his voice barely a whisper. “I don’t want you to ever feel like that again, Swan.”

She threw her arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. “Thank you.” She whispered.

He kissed her temple, pulling her closer to him, “Do you want some breakfast?” He asked.

“I’m starving…” She admitted.

“I’ll get to it.” He said as he left the bed and headed to the bathroom.

Killian was finishing the pancakes when he felt Emma’s arms around his waist. “Coffee is done, milady. And I’m about to finish the pancakes.” He said as he turned around to kiss her. He noticed she had borrowed some of his pajama pants and a white T-shirt.

“Do you mind?” She asked.

“Not at all, Swan. They look remarkably better on you than me.” He smirked as he placed the pancakes over the plates and handed one to her. He sipped his coffee and looked at her.

“Do you have any plans for today?” He asked smiling. “Because if you don’t, I’d love for us to spend the day together…”

“What are you offering?” She asked with a smirk.

“I’m torn, actually…” He said as he laid the plate on the counter and reached for her, “I’m very tempted to go back to the bedroom and spend all day worshiping your body…” He trailed kisses down her neck, his hand reaching beneath the T-shirt she was wearing to caress her stomach and move up to fondle her breast. She moaned in appreciation.

“Or…” She asked in a strained voice.

He looked at her smiling. “It’s a beautiful day outside, Emma. Perfect weather for sailing…” His eyes were sparkling. “We could pack a lunch basket and spend the day in my boat.”

“I’d like that…” She said. “But I’m in desperate need of a shower. And a change of clothes…” She pointed out.

“Right…” He said. “Do you have to go back to your place?” He asked with a slight hint of sadness to see her go.

“Actually, I have an overnight bag on the bug. I always keep one in case I need to crash in a motel during a stakeout.” She smiled at him. “I didn’t bring it over because I didn’t want to jinx it.” She admitted shyly.

He reached out to kiss her. “I’ll go grab it for you… give me your car keys.” He offered with a smile on his face. “You stay here and enjoy your breakfast, I’ll be right back.”

He was already wearing sweatpants and a shirt, so he put on a hoodie and shoes before quickly running out of the door.

 

They packed a lunch basket and headed to the docks, where he walked with her towards his boat. It was a very nice one, Emma thought. It wasn’t the Jolly Roger, but Killian seemed happy with it. She walked to the hull to see the name and let a laugh when she saw it.

She raised an eyebrow at him, “ _Really?_ ” She asked pointing at the painted letters that read _The Beanstalk_. He shrugged. “I needed a name.”

She walked back to him, hugging him and resting her head against his chest. “I like it.”

“I’m glad you do.” He smiled at her as he caressed her back. “Now, shall we?”

“Aye, aye, _pirate_.”

He sailed them out of the docks and into the open water, heading to New York. She breathed in the salty air and felt the wind on her face. She glanced at him standing tall and proud next to the helm, looking at the horizon. She’d missed that look on him. He looked breathtakingly handsome, the wind on his hair, his hand and hook on the helm, his eyes lost in the open water. He noticed her staring and looked at her, a smile in his face.

“Everything alright, Swan?” He asked.

“I’m just enjoying the view…” She said.

“Come here…”He called and she walked towards him. He pulled her to him, capturing her between himself and the helm, his arms circling her as he steered the boat. She pressed her body fully to his, closing her eyes and feeling his lips kissing her hair.  She breathed in deeply as she felt his chest rise and fall against her back. And in that moment, it was almost as if their thoughts were in sync with each other.

_This is all I ever wanted._

He dropped the anchor when the view of the city was near, and they enjoyed a late lunch and lazy afternoon alternating between above and below deck, until he finally steered the boat back to the docks while she hugged him and rested her head against his shoulder. He leaned back to whisper in her ear. “Stay with me tonight?”

“Absolutely.” She replied.

When they arrived at his apartment, he pulled her into his arms, “Do you want to go out or stay in?”

“I’m pretty tired, to be honest,” She admitted. “Sailing can be quite exhausting. Especially the activities below deck.” She beamed at him and he quirked an eyebrow at her.

“Pizza and a movie then?” He said. “I know the perfect place for pizza. It should not take me long to go grab some.”

“Do they have pineapple pizza?” She asked and he looked at her horrified.

“Heavens, no. Let me order the pizza, love.”

She was about to say something when he brushed his lips to hers. “ _Try something new, darling. It’s called trust._ ”  

“You are asking me to trust _Captain Hook with modern food choices_?”

“You won’t regret it.”

“Fine.” She said as she brushed her lips to his. “Can I borrow more of your clothes?”

“Take anything you like.” He said kissing her soundly. “I’ll be right back.”

She was comfortably settled on the couch when he got back with a box of pizza and two beers and set them on the coffee table in front of them. He went to the kitchen to grab some napkins and then sat on the floor next to her legs.

“So…. Movie choice?” She asked.

“Take your pick, Swan.” He said.

“I’m intrigued to know about your favorites.” She said as she grabbed the remote. “You mentioned _The Godfather._ But what else do you like? Action movies?”

He shook his head. “Too loud and far-fetched.”

“Says the man that was born on the Enchanted Forest.” She retorted as she grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite. “Oh my god, this is delicious.” She acknowledged.

“Told you, Swan.” He smirked as he drank his beer.

“Ok, so you don’t like action movies. What about comedies?”

“Do people actually find those things funny? They are preposterous.” He said offended and she laughed.

“Horror movies?”

“I’ve seen enough real blood to last me a life time.” He said and raised his eyebrows, tilting his head. “ _Or three._ ”

“Drama?”

“I tolerate those a little more…” He said.

“Wait a minute… that only leaves... Killian, do you like _romantic movies_?” She almost choked on the words.

“I like good romantic movies, with an interesting plot and a realistic happy ending.” He admitted. “Like _When Harry met Sally._ ”

“That was a surprise.” She said looking at him with curiosity. “What else? Tell me one movie you like I’d never be able to guess…”

He pondered for a moment. “You are going to laugh at me, Swan.”

“I promise I will do no such thing.” She said. “Pirate’s honor.” He gave her an annoyed look.

He sighed, his hand waving in the air. “Alright: _The Goonies._ ”

“ _The Goonies?!?_ That’s a kid’s movie.” She said raising her eyebrows in surprise.

“There’s treasure hunt and a pirate ship, Swan. What’s _not_ to like?” He stated matter-of-factly.

She got off the couch and bent to sit next to him, grabbing his face and kissing him slowly.

“What was that for?” He asked looking at her dazzled.

“That was cute. You are cute” She said.

“Careful who you call cute, Swan.” He said. “I have a reputation to uphold.” He whispered in her ear, nibbling her earlobe. “And it doesn’t necessarily involve _cute_.”

“Let’s finish our pizza and you can show me all that your reputation involves.” She replied looking intently at him.

 

They drove in separate cars to her apartment on Sunday morning so Emma could leave her bug and change into clean clothes before picking up Henry.

“Where does Regina live?” Killian asked.

“Upper East Side.” Emma replied.

“Of course.” Killian sighed as he started the car and headed into the city.

Regina was waiting outside with Henry when they pulled into the drive.

“Hello, Captain.” She said.

“Still a Lieutenant, Mrs. Locksley.” He replied smiling.

“It’s taking you quite a while,” She said with a little snark but smiling broadly at him.

“You know, these things tend to take longer when one has to play by the rules, majesty.” He replied at her and she nodded.

Emma looked at Regina, “Thank you for letting Henry come with us, Regina.”

“No problem. Have fun. See you tonight, Henry.” She nodded curtly before entering her front door back.

 

As they drove back to Jersey, Killian started to get slightly nervous. Emma looked at him fondly. “Killian, I’m sure it’ll be OK. Granted, I can be a little prickly, but I’m sure I can come up with some good conversation topics for a few hours.”

“Swan, listen to me. There are three very important things for them: food, family and soccer. Just avoid food and soccer and you’ll be fine.”

“Oh come on, food would be one of my strong topics!”

“Have you learned to cook during these three years?” He asked.

“Not really.” Henry replied from the backseat and Emma gave him an annoyed look.

“Ok. I don’t cook, but I do like Italian food. I love pizza, I can talk about that." She offered.

"Oh no, Swan, what you eat it's not pizza. It's a crime against humanity for these people... Listen to me, by all means, love: _Do not mention that you like pineapple pizza_. No matter how besotted I am with you, _they will kick you out_." Killian said seriously and she looked at him shocked.

“You are not joking, are you?”

“Does it look to you like I’m joking?” He replied nervously. “Stay away from food and soccer.”

“I can talk a little about soccer. Henry used to play. Or at least, I have fake memories of him playing or something.” She said confused and Henry rolled her eyes.

“Do you know any Italian League teams?” He asked.

“ _Do you_?” She retorted in shocked confusion.

“We get together to watch the games from time to time. They all have different favorites, so it’s not like I can actually give one team’s name…”

“Which one is _your_ favorite?” She asked curious.

“I usually switch teams in different seasons, according to how they are playing and their winning chances.” He looked at her and noticed her offended stare. “Pirate, love.” He smirked and heard Henry’s laugh from the backseat. “Currently: Juventus FC. I like their goalie, he has poise”.

“Alright. Yeah. I’m staying out of that one…” Emma said.

“What about me?” Henry asked. “Any topics I should avoid?”

“Lad, they are going to adore you. They’ll feed you and say you need a haircut… but they’ll adore you.” Killian stated.

They finally arrived and Killian parked the car into an available spot. As they exit the car, Killian turned around to look at Henry. “Can you give us a moment, lad?” He said and Henry nodded.

“Are you done freaking out?” She asked amused.

“I’ve survived centuries of bad weather at sea and life threatening situations, Swan. I don’t freak out, I _prepare_.” He said as he pulled her into his arms. “I just wanted to tell you one thing…”

“What?” She said.

“Those people over there are important to me, and I want you to like them and them to like you. But if they don’t… _it doesn’t change anything,_ Swan _._ ” He looked at her, his eyes boring into his. “Do you understand, Emma?”

She brushed her lips to his. “I do. Now… let’s get this done with.” She smiled at him.

He grabbed her hand as they walked towards the door, Henry trailing behind them. He knocked on the door and smiled at Emma. They could hear noise coming from inside the house and then the door opened and a tall, thin woman in her early seventies appeared. She had grey hair and a lovely smile.

“Killian!” She said as she threw her arms at him. Killian let go of Emma’s hand to go hug the woman.

“Maria…” He greeted softly. He pulled away, grabbing Emma’s hand again. “Maria, this is Emma. And Henry.”

“Oh it’s so lovely to meet you both!” Maria exclaimed as she pulled Emma into a tight hug. “Come in, you must be starving…”

She motioned for them to enter the house and as they were entering, Maria reached to touch Killian’s hair, “You need a haircut, dear.” She said to him.  Emma tried very hard to hide the grin on her face as Killian blushed.

There were a lot of people gathering around the house and the yard, and Emma looked slightly overwhelmed. Big reunions were not her thing. It was her parents’ thing, but certainly not hers. Luckily, Maria only yelled generally at the crowd that Killian had arrived with her and they all looked to them to greet them and they continued with their own talks. She saw Mac approaching them, a smile on his face.

“Quick! Exit to the backyard.” He motioned. “It’s less crowded. Henry!” Mac also called. “Come this way, I’ll show you where the teenagers are hiding…” Mac smirked and Henry waved at them before leaving with Mac.

Killian smiled as he headed to the backyard, never letting go of Emma’s hand. The backyard was considerably less crowded, with a few people around their age and kids running around. She briefly scanned the yard before she froze confused at a tall, dark haired man.

“Is that… the _flower delivery guy_?” She asked shockingly.

Killian chuckled. “That’s Vinnie. He actually owns the flower shop with his family. He’s one of Laura’s cousins.”

“I thought Joey from the bakery was Laura’s cousin…”

“That too.” Killian said before he waved at Vinnie, who smiled and headed their way. “Careful with Vinnie, he flirts with everything that moves.”

She looked at him and retorted “Says Captain Innuendo. But he didn’t flirt with me.” She offered.

“That was because he’s been _warned_.” Killian said raising his eyebrows at her and Emma rolled her eyes.

“Vinnie!” Killian called as he clasped Vinnie’s shoulder. “You remember Emma, right?”

“Nice to finally meet you _officially_.” Vinnie said. “I hope you are enjoying the flowers.” He smiled.

“They are beautiful, thank you.” Emma said.

“Thank Killian. He’s the one choosing them after all.” Vinnie winked. “I hope you enjoy lunch and we don’t scare you too much.” He said before he was called out.

“Vinnie! Leave that poor girl alone!” Emma and Killian turned around to see a brunette coming their way. Emma recognized her from the hospital.

“Emma, this is Laura.” Killian said as the brunette reached them and she smiled at them. “Mac’s wife.”

“Hi, it’s great to _finally_ meet you.” Laura said. “I’ve heard so much about you… From _Mac_.” She added when she saw Killian’s face blushing. “How was dinner the other day? Please, _please_ , tell me he didn’t overcook the pasta.”

Killian chuckled and Emma smiled. “It was perfect, thank you very much.”

“Anytime.” Laura replied. “Now, Killian, be a sweetheart and get lost so I can talk to Emma.” Laura smiled at him. Killian looked at Emma worryingly but she smiled reassuringly at him.

“I’ll go find Mac.” Killian said giving Emma a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t miss me much.” He added to her ear and she rolled her eyes at him.

When Killian was gone, Laura turned around and pointed at the interior of the house. “Food, and more importantly, _alcohol_ , are in that direction. Come with me.” She smiled as she and Emma headed to the kitchen. “I know, we can be pretty overwhelming, but we mean no harm.” She smiled.

“Oh, it’s OK.” Emma said. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It kind of is…” Laura whispered. “He hasn’t brought a girl in years… so we are all very excited about meeting you. But we’ll behave. _Mostly_.” She smirked.

“I just hope I make a good impression.” Emma replied nervously.

“Oh dear, don’t worry about that. Mac has been telling them how wonderful you are.” Laura waved her hand dismissively.  “And if that is not enough…” Laura pointed at Killian, who was talking with Mac, but had just looked at them and gave her a big, warm smile. “Killian’s face when he’s with you would definitely do the trick. Don’t worry, just be yourself.” She smiled as she pointed to an enormous table filled with food. “What do you want to eat?”

Henry came her way, grabbing a slice of pizza from the table while Laura was attending some situation at the kitchen.

“Are you having a nice time, kid?” Emma asked.

“The food is delicious.” Henry said and then he looked at his mom and smirked.

“What?” Emma said.

“I think it’s funny. All those times that Killian had to prove to our family that he was worthy of you… now you have to prove _to his family that you’re worthy of him_.” He raised his eyebrows. “It’s like poetic justice.”

Emma rolled her eyes.

“Don’t worry, mom. They seem to like me; I’ll try to put in a good word for you.” Henry said before disappearing.

Emma turned around to look at the room full of people talking animatedly with each other.

“Are you ok?” Mac asked as he came to her and handed her a beer.

“They look…” Emma was trying to find the right word.

“Scary? Overwhelming? Crazy?” Mac offered.

Emma scoffed. _“Passionate.”_

“They are crazy about Killian. When he moved here and they found out he had no family, they just adopted him. They love to cook for him, nag him about getting a haircut, convince him he needs to find someone but then proceed to criticize every single girl as not good enough for him. And then they go back to the haircut again.” Mac pointed out to Killian, who was caught up on a conversation with Maria and another old lady. “And he’s nice to them. He lets them nag him and visits them and listens to their stories and advice. He’s the perfect _son_.  And he hangs out with the guys and stops by the bakery and always has a compliment for them. They freaking love him as if he were one of their flesh and blood. It took me years for them to treat me half as good as they treat him.” Mac sighed. “Bastard.” He teased.

Emma smiled sadly and Mac reached out to take her hand.

“Hey, I’m joking. It’s very clear that he hasn’t had people caring for him in a long time. I’m glad he has this. Besides, it gets them off my back. I haven’t had a haircut lecture in three years.” He smirked.

Emma looked at Killian, who seemed to have been looking for her. When he finally met her eyes, he smiled as he leaned in to whisper something in Maria’s ear. She smiled fondly at him before caressing her cheek and giving him a kiss. He smiled back before turning around and heading Emma’s way.

He was by her side in an instant, his arm closing on her waist, pulling her tighter to him. “I’m sorry,” He said, “They tend to linger in conversation and it’s bad form to leave in the middle.” He tried to explained but Emma smiled at him as she met his eyes. “It’s fine.” She said. “I’m actually having a great time.”

He smiled at her and leaned in to brush his lips chastely to hers. She smiled against his lips before playfully bit his lower lip. He laughed as he pulled away. “Behave, Swan. We have a lot of company.”

“Killian!” A sharp voice called from behind them and they turned around to see a brunette girl running their way, followed by Laura and Maria.

He bent on one knee to hug the little girl. “Hi Marissa.” He said. The girl looked at him with dreamy eyes. “You are going to come to my birthday party, right?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world…” He replied smiling.

“It’s going to be a themed party this year.” Laura said.

“What is the theme?” Killian asked.

“Pirates and princesses.” Laura replied, raising an eyebrow at him. “ _Thank you, sunshine_.”

Emma chuckled and Killian couldn’t help the wide grin on his face. “And I presume you’d be…” He asked Marissa.

“A pirate, of course!” The little girl said.

“That’s a tough lass…” Killian smiled at her. Marissa then turned her head towards Emma, examining her with a curious look.

“Is this your girlfriend?” She asked and Emma’s heart skipped a beat.

Killian smiled as he stood up next to Emma, his reassuring eyes never leaving hers, “Yes, Marissa, this is Emma. Emma, this is Marissa, Mac’s youngest.”

Marissa looked at her seriously before flashing Emma a bright smile. “She’s pretty. She can come. Do you have a princess costume?”

Killian and Emma both chuckled. “I think that can be arranged…” Emma said. “I do have a tiara.” She offered.

“Good.” The little girl said before sprinting towards the backyard.

Maria turned around to look at Emma, “I trust that you are having a nice time with us?”

Emma smiled and nodded, “Yes, thank you very much for inviting me.”

“You are welcome to come back any time you want, dear.” Maria said. “And just so we are clear… Killian is very important to us.” She said with a somewhat stern, yet amiable expression.

Emma tensed for a second before looking at Maria straight in the eyes, a true smile on her face. “He’s very important to me too.” She risked a glance in Killian’s direction and saw the joy in his eyes and a smile on his face.

“Good.” Maria said.

“Alright, that is enough, Nona, let’s leave them alone.” Laura said as she dragged Maria away. She turned around for a second to whisper to Emma. “Trust me, if that is all the warning you got, she _really_ likes you.” And she followed Maria towards the house.

Emma felt Killian’s arms embracing her from behind, pulling her to him. He rested his chin in her shoulder and whispered in her ear, “You are very important to me too, Swan.”

“Good.” She replied.

 

As the afternoon came to an end, Killian drove them back to New York and they dropped Henry by Regina’s place. He then drove Emma to her place.

“I hope you had a nice time, Emma.” He said as they were walking to her place.

“It was interesting…” She replied smiling and holding his hand.

“I know, they can be a little overwhelming, but they truly have the best intentions.” Killian said, his voice shaking slightly. “When I came here, I didn’t know anyone and when Mac first invited me there, it was quite interesting, actually. They just started talking and giving me directions to places I needed to visit in town. Then they gave me food to take home so I wouldn’t have to cook.” Killian sighed. “And they never stopped doing it.” He shrugged nonchalantly. “I know it’s silly…” He said and she could see his eyes sparkling a little and she understood.

“You like it, admit it. You are being smothered by a bunch of Italian ladies and _you love it_.” She teased him.

“It’s nice, to feel the warmth of a family. I never had a family, other than Liam and he’s been gone for so long that I’ve almost forgotten how it felt.” He scratched behind his ear. “But yes, you caught me, Swan. It’s nice to feel that people care for you, take care of you, worry about you. I know they are not my real family but they’ve always treated me like one of their own. It’s nice to feel that way. _Loved_.”

Watching him open up to her, showing her his vulnerability, his deepest desires, his voids in life, after a weekend where they have shared so much with each other, it finally hit her.

“I love you.” She said suddenly.

His expression changed into a shocked one, his eyes searching hers in slight confusion…

“I love you,” She smiled. “I loved you then, although I was not ready to admit it. And I love you now. I love the pirate in leather clothes and a hook and I love the police detective in modern clothes and a prosthetic hand. I love all versions of you, because you are one and the same. Killian, Hook, it doesn’t matter to me. I care about you, I worry about you, I want to take care of you. _I love you_. All of you.”

He had the most delicious look of awe in his face. She had rendered him speechless and she was enjoying it.

“Are you going to say something anytime soon?” She teased.

He smiled to her, a huge, goofy grin that lighted up his blue eyes. “I love you too, Swan.” He said softly. He cupped her face with his hand and pulled her to him, kissing her slowly, lovingly. He broke the kiss and rested his forehead against hers, his nose nuzzling hers. “ _I’ve always loved you._ ” 

He stared at her, trying to memorize each detail of this moment into his mind.

“What?” She asked curiously, her fingers caressing the scar on his cheek.

He tried to convey in his eyes everything he felt, “It’s nothing… it’s just…I’m _happy_ , Emma.”

“Happier than you’ve been in the last century?” She teased but he could feel the insecurity behind her question.

“ _In my entire life, my love_.” He replied smiling and she smiled again and it was the most beautiful sight he’d seen in over three centuries: light, carefree, happy.

He kissed her again and again, dizzy on his love for her, and she kept repeating the same words to him over and over: _I love you, I love you_.

He couldn’t remember how long it took them to get to the apartment, or her bedroom, or the bed. He didn’t really care: every one of those kisses would be forever etched in his memory.

The perfect end for a perfect weekend. Emma Swan loved him. And he loved her.


	30. The Fairytale

_I'm so glad I found you_  
 _I'm not gonna lose you_  
 _Whatever it takes I will stay here with you_  
 _Take it to the good times_  
 _See it through the bad times_  
 _Whatever it takes is what I'm gonna do_  
**Nothing is going to stop us now, Starship**

Emma was sitting on the kitchen, enjoying her coffee and going through the file of her new case when she heard the doorbell ring. She opened the door to find Vinnie smiling at her from under a massive arrangement of orchids. “Good morning, Emma.” He said.

“Vinnie, hi!” She said. “This has to stop…”She sighed as she took the orchids from him. She had to admit they were beautiful.

“Tell Killian, sweetheart. I only follow orders and I’m pretty sure he’ll lock me up if I refuse to bring you the flowers.”

“These are beautiful…” She said. “He must be spending a fortune on this. I’ll talk to him.”

“Not sure it will make a difference, Emma.” Vinnie said sighing. “Look, is not my business but I’ll say it anyway. He’s happy, sweetheart; and it’s because of _you_. Let him do this…”

Emma smiled and nodded. Vinnie winked at her. “Besides, do you really think I’ll charge him for the flowers? He’s _family_ , Emma. Have a nice day…” With that, he turned around and left.

Emma found a small parchment tied to the orchids:

_I love you._  
I’ve always loved you.   
I’ll always love you.  
Killian

In another state, Mac looked up from his desk to see a disheveled Killian entering the room with haste.

“You are late, sunshine.” Mac said.

“I know. It takes longer to get here from New York in the morning than I had calculated.” Killian said as he went to his desk.

“You are wearing yesterday’s clothes.” Mac pointed out Killian’s wrinkled shirt.

“Sharp this morning, aren’t we Detective Sanders?” Killian retorted. “Look, I wasn’t _planning_ to stay the night. It just happened.” He smiled as he remembered why he’d stayed. “I have a spare change of clothes in the locker room. I need ten minutes for a shower and an attire change and then we can focus on the case again, ok?” He said.

“By all means, loverboy, take your time.” Mac replied smiling.

 

During the next weeks, Emma relished learning many things about Killian. While he’d always been able to read her like an open book and guess many of her likes and routines, there were also several things that they were only learning about each other now. After a few weeks of them _not so casually dating_ , she now knew that he was an early riser. That came as a no surprise, the man had commanded a ship for over three centuries, and she imagined that such feat was not accomplished by staying in his cabin until late in the day. He also had a distinct liking to making love to her in the mornings, waking her up with his nose nuzzling her neck as he whispered compliments and loving words in her ear. He was an avid reader, an activity he preferred over watching television or a movie. He would pick up books from the local library and he could actually spend an entire afternoon engrossed in a book. She always found a way to distract him from that and he did not seem to complain. And finally, while he drank coffee regularly, he seemed to have an affinity for mint tea, which ranked as high as rum in being considered the solution for everything. Especially when he combined both on a cold night. She loved the taste of rum and mint when he kissed her softly goodnight, and more than once it was that taste that had turned a soft kiss into a passionate love making session. She loved every one of his quirks and routines, even the ones that drove her crazy (the man was certainly a methodical neat freak).

Killian learned that Emma was most definitely not a morning person and the only way he’d figured out he had to improve her mood was making love to her in the mornings, something he truly enjoyed. There was something about the lazy, slow rhythm of moving against her with the first rays of sunlight that made him feel the luckiest man alive. In addition, regardless of what Henry had claimed, she could somewhat cook and actually found it relaxing after chasing bad guys all day. One of his favorite moments was cooking with her, even if it was a simple meal, although they were daring to try new things, with Laura’s text instructions at hand. After all, they’d only overcooked the pasta once. Or twice.

Almost without noticing, he had started to use the hook often around the apartment. It came naturally to him: he would arrive home, remove the prosthetic hand and put on the brace and hook. Or when they were sailing, or visiting her parents. He would join Emma and Henry in their family dinner night and now, when he leaned back, his arm resting on Emma’s chair; he would still gain a look from David and Mary Margaret, but he would smile softly as Emma would lean into him and he’d press a soft kiss to the top of her hair.

 

“Emma, stand still! I am not finished.” Mary Margaret said frustrated, as she tried to put the finishing touches to Emma’s hair, carefully placing the tiara on top of her head. She then took a few steps back and her eyes filled with tears. “Oh Emma….” She whispered.

“Really?!?” Emma asked in disbelief.

“Cut your mother some slack,” David said, entering the room. “It’s not like we got to send you to a ball. You look beautiful, Emma.” He smiled at her.

“A true princess.” Snow beamed as Emma looked at herself in the mirror. She was wearing a red gown fit for a princess and her hair was tied in a bun, her mother’s tiara on top. “We can pretend you are going to a ball and your escort will be here any minute now to accompany you.” Snow smiled and David scoffed.

“Yes, except her escort will be dressed like a _pirate_.” He sighed.

“My escort _is_ a pirate.” Emma corrected, a smile on her face as she heard a knock on the door.  “And not just _any pirate_ …” She called out proudly as she headed to the door.

“Can you please not sound _so proud about it_?” David sighed, running his hand through his hair.

Emma laughed as she opened the door and then her heart stopped. Full length leather coat, leather breeches, open black shirt showing a bare chest that she had gotten very acquainted with in the past few months, a beautifully embroidered red vest she hadn’t seen before. Flashy earing in his ear, flashy rings on his hand, his old brace and hook.

_Captain Hook was back. And she loved it._

“Oh… I’ve missed you.” She greeted him with a broad smile.

“Your Highness…” He bowed at her, his hand grabbing hers to place a soft kiss on her knuckles. “You look stunning, Swan.” He whispered before placing a soft kiss on her lips.

“You look _dashing_ , Hook.” She beamed at him.

“Shall we, princess?” He asked and then he heard the sound of a throat clearing. He looked past Emma to smirk at David.

“Your Majesty, I assure you that your daughter couldn’t be in better hands. Or hand.” He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows and Emma laughed.

“I still know how to use my sword, Killian.” David threatened but Mary Margaret slapped his arms playfully before beaming at Killian and Emma. “Have fun!” She beamed at them.

They haven’t made it to the end of the hall when he cornered her against the wall, a smirk on his face and a mischievous look on his eyes. His hand caressed her waist as he pressed softly against her.

“What?” She asked as her hands caressed his arms.

“Sometimes I forget…” He said with a smile and then he sighed. “And then I see you like this and I’m reminded and I just can’t fathom it, Swan.”

“Fathom what? The fact that Captain Hook scored with a princess of the Enchanted Forest?” She teased at him and he chuckled lightly before setting his blue eyes on her, the intensity of his stare taking her breath away.

“That Captain Hook is hopelessly,” He whispered, his eyes never leaving hers, “Wretchedly in love with Emma, the Swan Princess, the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming, the product of True Love.” His lips brushed hers softly, happiness dancing in his blue eyes as his hand squeezed her waist tighter, his body pressing a little less chastely against hers. “And the bastard is lucky enough to have her love him back.” He said against her lips before capturing them in a soft kiss. “I love you princess.” He said as he broke the kiss.

“I love you pirate.” She replied smiling at him. “Come on, we have a birthday party to get to.”

 

They arrived in time to Mac and Laura’s house, and they were greeted by Mac dressed as a prince and Laura dressed like a pirate, which made Emma smile brightly as she stood back and watched how Killian became the life of the party. She knew from the time they’d spent with Mac and his family that both of Mac’s daughters were crazy about Killian.

But her heart clenched as she watched how crazy they all were about _Captain Hook_. He entertained them throughout the afternoon with swashbuckling tales about storms; ship boarding and armada fighting that had everyone at the edge of their seats, including her. He never used to speak much about his pirating days and she knew that he was trying to put his villain past behind him. But here, now, hearing him speak freely of his past, it reminded her of the many fated coincidences that had brought them together.

As the afternoon faded away, she smiled as she sat next to him. He smiled softly at her, while he kept his gaze on the little girls playing around in her pirate outfits. She noticed him balling his hand into a fist absentmindedly. Sometimes, he was an open book for her.

“What was she like?” She asked softly. He seemed dazed for a second, before he turned around to look at her and smiled sadly. “You’ve never spoken of her… I – I’m curious.” She admitted.

“Beautiful. Spirited. Stubborn. Caring. ” He said, his hand reaching for hers as he turned his head around to contemplate the scene on the backyard. “She could commandeer my entire crew with tenacity one moment and hold their hands while tending their wounds the next.” He sighed, fidgeting with his hook against his thigh. “She loved to draw. She liked to sing in the evenings….” His voice trailed off as he got lost in his memories and she let him, her hand holding his; giving him a moment to remember her. To grieve her.

“Henry looks like her.” He said a few moments later. “He has her eyes.”

“You should tell him about her sometime.” Emma said. “I’m sure he’d like to hear about her…”

“Aye, I will. “ He said before reaching to her and pressing his lips softly to hers. He pulled her closer to him, capturing her in his arms. “You know, Swan…” He said as he placed a kiss to her head, his gaze lost in the family that was celebrating in front of them, “I understand now… seeing all this,” He sighed, “I understand why you left Storybrooke.”

“I should have asked you to come with me…”She whispered, snuggling closer to him, “But I was afraid. You’d just drowned and I felt like I couldn’t let you in because I was afraid of losing you. I no longer had magic, how could I keep you safe?” She felt his arms pulling her tighter against him.

He sighed deeply. “I am sorry that you’ve lost your magic because of me.” He said, guilt creeping in his voice. She shifted in his arms; hear head facing his as she looked at him with curious green eyes.

“Killian… About my magic…” She started hesitantly, but felt at ease with his reassuring stare. “Ever since you and I… ever since _this_ happened,” She motioned at the two of them, “I’ve felt different…”

His eyes grew bigger in surprise, his eyebrows rising to his forehead, but he kept silent, waiting for her to continue. This made Emma even more hesitant.

“What? No innuendos as a reply? Who are you and what have you done with Hook?” She teased him nervously.

“I think this is serious enough for me not to tease you about it.” He said, his hand squeezing hers tightly, a reassuring smile on his face. “What you are trying to say, Swan, is that you think your magic is back?” He asked directly.

“I think it might be.” She confessed to him. He pondered her answer for a moment.

“Well, we could always go back to Storybrooke and see what happens there…” He offered.

She smiled at him, her eyes looking fairly at him “But that is the thing… I-I don’t need to get my magic back or break a curse to know…” She trailed off.

“Know what?” He asked intently, his eyes never leaving hers.

“That us, this, it’s _true_. That the way I feel about you is true, Killian.” She held his hand tightly, her eyes never leaving his.  “I love you. I chose you.” She breathed deeply. “I chose us, _this_ , to be true. _Real_. And to me, that means much more than breaking a curse.”  

“The product of True Love doesn’t believe in True Love’s Kiss?” He asked, trying to make sense of her words, because he couldn’t believe what her words meant. It was too good to be true. These things didn’t happen to him. In the centuries he’d been alive, they’d never happened to him.

“No.” She replied earnestly. “The product of True Love _doesn’t need proof_ to know that you, Killian Jones, are _hers_.” She looked at him, certainty in her eyes. “You are my happy ending, Killian. I love you.”

“And you are mine, Emma.” He vowed, “I love you too.”

 

When they went back to his apartment, she pulled him into his arms and he leaned into her, his body swaying against hers. “I’ve missed seeing you like this, Hook.” She confessed, her voice a velvety caress against his stubbled cheek.

“You’ve missed the pirate, Swan?” He asked teasingly, a hint of self-deprecation in his voice, “You’d be the first one, love.”

“Perhaps,” She conceded. “But it’s a part of you, of who you were for centuries.”

“It’s not a part I’m very proud of…” He admitted, pulling away from her a little, “The things I did…” He trailed off and she held him against her, her hand grabbing his hook.

“You are not a villain anymore, Hook.” She said “But that man, he wasn’t afraid to do anything to survive…”She lifted his hook with her hand. “How many times did this hook save your life, Killian?”

He swallowed. “Many, I suppose.” He confirmed.

“Sometimes I wish you’d still carry it with you. Sometimes I wish you could be the pirate that doesn’t follow the rules and not the detective that has to.” She shook her head, trying to make sense of her words, “Thomas is still out there…”

He pulled her to him, his forehead touching hers, his lips brushing hers. “Nothing will happen to me, love…”

“Promise me, Killian.”

“I promise.” He said before kissing her slowly, his arms scooping her up and carrying her to the bedroom.


	31. The Pirate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know... it's been a while, but life and work has been hectic.

_I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride_  
 _I'm wanted dead or alive_  
 _I'm a cowboy, I got the night on my side_  
 _I'm wanted dead or alive_  
 _And I ride, dead or alive_  
 _I still drive dead or alive_  
**Wanted Dead or Alive, Bon Jovi**

Killian’s phone buzzed with a text and he smiled to see it was from Emma. After reading it, he looked puzzled for a second before reaching out and handing his phone to Mac.

“Take a look at this, Emma found a connection to Thomas through one of her new cases.” He smirked at Mac, who read the text and looked back at him

“You are incredibly proud of her at this moment, aren’t you?” Mac inquired.

“I’m _always_ proud of her.” Killian affirmed.  “Come on, let’s go check it out.”

 

A few hours later, a new operation was set in place. They had to move fast if they wanted to catch Thomas by surprise. Mac approached Killian before the rest of the officers gathered together for instructions.

“I’ll go first, you stay behind.” Mac said, adjusting his vest.

“That is not how we do it, Mac.” Killian said but Mac cut him off.

“That is not how we’ve done because you have pulled the family card on me, Killian. But you don’t hold that card anymore. You have a family waiting for you to return safely now too, sunshine. Emma is waiting for you. Henry is waiting for you.” Mac said, determination in his eyes. “You’ve stood in the line of fire for three years, mate, protecting my family; and for that, I am thankful. But it’s my turn.”

Killian saw the determination in Mac’s eyes and he knew he had no way of changing his decision; so he swallowed hard and nodded. “Be careful, Mac. Don’t do anything reckless, mate.”

“I won’t.” Mac promised

 

Killian sat in his car and looked around the deserted yard. He and Mac had given their orders, everyone was in place, everyone was ready. He took a deep breath and exhaled deeply. He only had one more thing to do.

 

After Mac and his team broke in, Killian saw Thomas almost immediately; coming to the side of the yard, running fearless and turning around to fire his gun. He started chasing him, getting closer, his gun in his right hand. Thomas sensed his presence a second too soon and barged into him, the full weight of his body impacting Killian’s chest and sending him to the ground. He tried to get up, but Thomas had the advantage and he used it to pummel Killian, knocking the air out of him and sending his gun away. Thomas looked at him from above, a ruthless smirk in place while Killian tried to break free from the lock Thomas had him in.

“Didn’t I shoot you last time?” Thomas asked. “You were shielding a pretty blonde. A fine piece of ass if I recall. Is she around? I’d love to ride some of that.” He spat.

Killian’s jaw clenched, his voice a threatening whisper, “Leave her out of this!”

“I’ll enjoy killing you and then tracking down that blonde and having my fun with her” Thomas looked at him smirking, slowly pulling up to aim his gun at Killian.  “Did you honestly think a cop can take me?” He asked triumphantly, removing the safety on of his gun.

Killian spoke in a strained but ruthless voice. “That’s the thing, mate. I’m not a cop. I’m a _pirate_.” He said as he lifted his left arm, his hook connecting to Thomas side and ripping his flesh forcefully. It was enough to divert the direction of Thomas’ shot but he still felt the piercing pain of a bullet connecting to his side, in a place where the vest had lifted up. He heard a second shot and raised his head. Thomas’ eyes were looking at him in disbelief as he collapsed on the side next to him, a shot near his heart. Mac had come to the rescue.

Killian took one look at Thomas, speaking with difficulty. “You might be the king of the Jersey lowlife… but I am _Captain bloody Hook_.” His hook pressed into his wound and he could feel the blood spluttering. He could also see the life leaving Thomas’s eyes. “See you in the afterlife, mate.” He whispered before letting his head fall and hit the ground.

“Killian! Killian! Stay with me, partner.” He heard Mac’s screams. “Killian don’t you dare!”

He had to hold on. He knew he had to hold on. Emma was waiting for him. He had promised.

_He had promised her._

Emma’s phone rang when she was at her parents’ house. She found it estrange that it was Mac calling.

“Hi Mac! Everything ok?” She asked and then she froze, almost dropping the phone. Her knees gave out  and she had to grab the counter so as not to lose her footing.

“Emma! What happened?!” David was by her side in an instant.

“Killian’s been shot.” Emma said, tears of desperation in her eyes.


	32. Hope

_Whatever it takes_   
_Or how my heart breaks_   
_I will be right here waiting for you  
_ **Right here waiting, Richard Marx**

Emma rushed to the hospital waiting room, her eyes frantically searching for Mac. He was by her side in an instant, his arms enveloping her in a tight hug.

“He’s in surgery.” He explained as he pulled away from her and they sat down in the waiting room. Part of his squad was already there and she figured the rest would be showing up soon.

“What happened?” Emma asked in a broken voice and Mac sighed deeply, running his hand through his hair.

“It’s all my fault, Emma.” His voice broke and he looked at Emma, his face etched with guilt. “He wanted to do the usual: him taking the lead, me as a backup. But I told him that he also had a family waiting for him now and that I would go first. I was trying to protect him…” He sighed deeply. “We got in, and Thomas seemed to escape. When I went out to chase him, he had Killian at his feet and he was about to shoot him.” His hand balled into a fist, his body tensing. “Then I noticed Killian hitting him with his left arm and that diverted Thomas’ shot. I – I just shot Thomas on the chest before he could shoot again. Thomas’ bullet hit Killian in the side, where his vest had lifted…” Mac trailed off, sighing.

Emma looked at him, tears in her eyes but also determination. “Tell me everything, Mac.” She pleaded.

“It was hard to stop the bleeding, Emma. But they rushed him to the OR and we have to wait.” Mac looked at her. “I’m sorry. If I had let him go first…”

“Then it would be you in that OR. That wouldn’t make me feel better.” Emma replied before something Mac said clicked in. “You said Killian hit Thomas?”

Mad looked at her, confusion in his eyes. “That is the strange part.” He said before reaching out to one of the chairs nearby. “He wasn’t wearing his hand… he was wearing _this_.”

Emma’s breath caught in her throat as she looked at the brace and hook that Mac has holding. Her hands moved to it instinctively, grabbing it from him and holding it tight.

Mac looked at her curiously. “He was wearing his hand when I left him so he must have changed at some point. I don’t understand… I thought it was a prop he used for Halloween. I never thought…” He sighed. “This saved his life.”

Emma’s tears starting running down her face. “ _Hook_ …” She whispered and she felt Mac’s hand on hers, squeezing tightly. “I’ve noticed you call him that from time to time.” He said.

She smiled through her tears. “He didn’t always wear a hand.” She offered. “He didn’t when I met him.” She sighed, her hands running along the hook, noticing the dried blood in it. Her heart broke at the sight.

Mac sighed again. “I am not oblivious, Emma.” He said. “I know there is a lot about Killian that doesn’t add up. There are a lot of loopholes in his story. I share a locker room with the guy, I’ve seen his scars and there are way too many for a man his age that has stayed on the good side of the law. The way he talks, his wisdom… they are from someone far older than what he looks like or claims to be.” He averted his gaze. “He looks pretty comfortable in his pirate costume waving that sword and hook around. Almost _too_ comfortable.” He looked at her and Emma could only smile at him.

“And what do you think?” She asked hesitantly.

“Honestly? Anything I can actually think of is too far-fetched for my mind to even acknowledge it.” He sighed. “And then I realize that _I don’t care_. Killian is my friend, my partner, he is my family. He’s the brother I never had. So whoever he was, whatever he’s done, it doesn’t matter to me. I choose to see the Killian that I’ve known and from the first day I met him, he’s had my back. At the end of the day, I trust Killian with my life and that is all I need to know.” He looked at her. “Emma, I don’t take life for granted, nor do I shoot to take someone’s life lightly. That is something Killian taught me when I first met him, that searching for vengeance always leaves you empty in the end.” Emma’s heart clenched at the words but Mac did not seem to realize, lost in his own thoughts. “I took a life today; and I’d do it again in a heartbeat if it meant saving _his_.”

Emma nodded, fighting the tears that were coming to her face, her eyes focused on the floor.

“He loves you.” Mac said and Emma turned around to find him looking solemnly at her. “He’s crazy about you. I think he never stopped loving you… I have never seen him as happy as he is now, with you and Henry. I just – I just thought you should know that.” Mac’s voice broke. “In case he hadn’t told you.”

“He has.” Emma confirmed. “And he knows I love him. I made sure he knew…” She said, her hand squeezing Mac’s reassuringly.

The sound of the door opening startled them and Emma watched as Laura barged in. Mac stood up in an instant, collapsing against her as she held him tight, her hand running through his hair as she whispered comforting words to him. It seemed Mac had been hanging by a thread, only waiting for Laura to finally break down. Emma looked in sad awareness how Mac and Laura comforted each other, her strength lifting him from the darkness where he had sunk into. It seemed that even in the real world, true love would find a way to manifest itself. Mac and Laura’s kiss would never break a curse, but Emma could almost feel the light and hope passing through their embrace.

She tore her eyes away, her gaze focusing on the hook she was still holding in her hands, a single tear running down her cheek as it sank into her that the only person that had given her that light and hope was lying in a surgery room, fighting for his life.  

 

Emma couldn’t recall how long it had been, the minutes felt like hours as they waited in the hospital. Mary Margaret and David joined her at some point, both of them holding her hand and giving her encouraging words. Maria had also arrived; she hugged Emma and reassured her that everything would be alright. As Laura’s family and Killian’s squad members kept arriving, Maria had taken the lead to inform and direct all new comers, leaving Emma out of the constant inquiries everyone had.

A little later, Henry barged into the room, followed by Regina. Henry hugged his mother tightly, speaking encouraging words to her.

“He’ll be ok, mom. I know he will.” He said before reaching out to his grandparents.

Emma turned to look at Regina. “Thank you for bringing him.” She said.

Regina nodded in acknowledgement before asking, “How is he?”

“He’s still in surgery. We have to wait.” Emma trailed off, a sense of hopelessness invading her.

Regina approached her, placing a reassuring hand in Emma’s shoulder, “Emma, Hook has survived the Dark One, Peter Pan, three hundred years of piracy, battling Maleficent, two curses and a car accident. And all of it when he didn’t have _you_ to come back to.” She looked at her, determination in her eyes. “He will survive this. It’s simply not in his nature to give up.” 

Emma nodded through her tears and Regina gave her shoulder one more squeeze. “I have to get back to Robin and Roland. Call me if you need me to pick up Henry or anything else.” She said before reaching out to hug Henry, Mary Margaret and David.

 

Shortly after that, a doctor came into the room. Mac was on his feet in an instant, Emma following him.

“Doctor, how is he?” Mac asked nervously.

“Detective, I am sorry, but I cannot give you any information.” The doctor said hesitantly. “Killian changed his emergency contact a few weeks ago… I need to talk to Emma Swan first.” He finished.

Emma’s heart skipped a beat as the words dawned in her and she noticed Mac’s resigned stare when he looked at her. “Right, it makes sense. I’ll just leave you to it.” Mac said and started to leave, but Emma stopped him placing her hand on his arm.

“He can stay.” She said. “He’s family too.” She smiled reassuringly at Mac, who looked thankfully at her.

“He’s stable.” The doctor said. “There wasn’t much internal damage. We were able to remove the bullet and he’s resting now. His body needs to recover because he’d lost a lot of blood. But you can see him if you want.”

Mac looked at Emma, an encouraging smile in his face. “You should go.” He said.

Emma wanted to go, but she also felt guilty about leaving Mac out of it. He’d been Killian’s family for years. “Are you sure?” She asked, fidgeting with her hands.

“Emma, it’s not me who he wants to see when he wakes up.” Mac smiled. “You should be there… _Go_.”

 

Emma sat by Killian’s side in the hospital room, one of her hands holding his as the other pushed the hair out of his forehead. He was sleeping peacefully, with no sight of pain; and that gave her hope. _He was going to wake up, he was going to be ok._

She didn’t recall how long he slept, but at some point, he stirred and opened his eyes, focusing on her face. He smiled softly at her. “Hey, beautiful.” He whispered.

It was his choice of words what sent her over the edge, as tears started to pour down her face and she leaned into him, pressing her lips firmly against his. It took him just a second to kiss her back with the same passion, his voice hoarse when he broke the kiss, his forehead resting against hers, “I promised you, Swan.”

“And you’ve kept it, _Hook_ ” She said, and the emphasis on his moniker was not lost on him.

“You saved me once again, love.” He whispered.

“You saved yourself.” She smiled at him.

 

After the doctor and nurse checked on him, Emma sat with him as people started coming into the room: Mac and Laura, Henry, her parents, Maria, and many members of his squad. Maria had made her sister bring some homemade minestrone for Killian and Emma and Vinnie had dropped by with a bouquet of black tulips, Killian’s favorite flower.  But it was clear that Killian needed to rest, and at some point, Maria took charge and commanded Killian’s squad out of the room with the threat of calling _Marty_ if they did not obey. Emma looked confused but she noticed how everyone quickly left the room. Maria pressed a kiss to Killian’s forehead, and left with a promise of bringing them some decent food tomorrow.

“Who’s Marty?” Emma asked as Maria left with Mac and Laura.

“The Police Commissioner. He was Maria’s husband’s partner. They have been friends for decades.” Killian explained.

“Maria’s husband was a cop?” Emma was intrigued.

“Aye. I got to meet him briefly; he passed away two years ago. He was retired from the force when I came here, as he was already sick.” Killian sighed. “He had great advice to give and was very important to me in my first year here. It was sad to see him die. His death from lung cancer was the reason Mac and I quit smoking.” Killian said scratching behind his ear.

“You used to smoke?!?”

“Briefly, when I got here. But when Mike died, Laura forced us to quit.” Killian smiled at her. “I haven’t touched a cigarette in two years, Swan. I swear.”

“I believe you…” She said as she leaned in to press her forehead against his.

“I’m glad you are here…” He said, closing his eyes and breathing her scent in.

“Where else would I be?” She replied. “I love you, Killian.”

“Aye. And I, you.”

The sound of the door opening interrupted them and Emma turned around to see who had come in. Her face filled with surprise as she recognized the striking brunette that was now frozen at the door.

“I’m sorry.” Rebecca said as she looked at them. “I heard the news and I came in. There was no one in the waiting room so I just…” She trailed off, embarrassed.

“Rebecca, hello…” Killian said awkwardly. “Do you remember Emma?” He asked politely.

“I think so, yes.” Rebecca said as she approached Emma and extended her hand. “Rebecca Andrews.”

“Emma Swan.” Emma said as she shook Rebecca’s hand. She saw a flicker of recognition and pain in Rebecca’s eyes before she quickly masqueraded it with a smile.

“I’m sorry.” Rebecca said again. “I didn’t mean to interrupt…”

Emma turned around to look at Killian who grabbed her hand, holding it tightly. She smiled at him reassuringly, “I’ll leave you guys alone.” She said. “I’ll go get some coffee.”

He nodded and squeezed her hand, “Thank you, love.” He said as his look bored into her eyes and he tucked his hand, pulling her hand to his lips and pressing a soft, tender kiss.

She smiled politely at Rebecca before leaving the room.

“So…” Rebecca said. “Her last name is _Swan_?” She asked intently.

Killian scratched his head behind his ear. “Aye…”

“And you two are…” Rebecca trailed off.

“It’s somewhat recent…” Killian explained. “We were not together when we last met. You’ll see…” He felt the need to explain, but Rebecca cut him off.

“Killian, I’ve seen your tattoo. And I’ve always known that you were in love with someone else.” She smiled at him.

“I’m sorry, Rebecca. I never meant to cause you pain.” Killian admitted guiltily.

“I know…” Rebecca took a deep breath.  “You never lied to me, Killian. I knew you were not over someone else. I know that is the reason why you broke up with me.”

“I tried, I really wanted to try with you…” Killian offered. “I just couldn’t… and it wasn’t fair to you.”

“I know you were serious about trying to move on with me. About us.” Rebecca sighed, giving him a soft smile. “I would have stayed with you, you know? Even if you didn’t love me. I was happy.”

He smiled sadly at her. “You deserved better than settling down like that… it would have been selfish from me to keep you under those circumstances, Rebecca. You deserved much better.”

“Yeah,” Rebecca gave him a grateful smile. “You taught me that, and you set me free to go find it.” She sighed. “Look, I didn’t come here to cause problems, I heard you were shot and I had to come see for myself that you were ok. I still care about your wellbeing.” She hesitated before approaching his bed and fidgeting with the strings of the quilt. “I have to go now, my - my boyfriend is waiting for me downstairs.”

Killian quirked an eyebrow at her. “Boyfriend, uh?” She smirked.

“Well, you told me I should find someone that loved me and cherished me and all that jazz, remember?” Killian chuckled at her words. “Well, _I did_.” She smiled triumphantly at him.

“Are you happy, Rebecca?” Killian asked earnestly.

“I am.” She replied. “Are you, Killian?”

“Very much…” He replied, sighing deeply as if a burden had been lifted from his shoulders.

“Good, because you deserve it.” She squeezed her hand. “I’m glad to see you are ok. Take care.” She said as she headed to the door.

“Aye, you too.”

She turned around to give him a final smile “Bye, Killian.”

“Goodbye, Rebecca.”

 

Emma ran into Rebecca on her way back to Killian’s room.  Rebecca gave her a small smile before speaking seriously “He’s a good guy… be good to him. He deserves it.”

“I know…” Emma nodded.

“Alright, I have someone waiting for me downstairs.” Rebecca sighed. “It was nice meeting you. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.” Emma replied.

As she entered the room, she found Killian looking at her with a peaceful smile. It was a welcoming change to the state he’d been the last time he’d run into Rebecca.

“Everything alright?” Emma asked hesitantly.

“Aye. Come here, Swan.” He said and she went to him, carefully sitting on the bed and looked at him. He grabbed her hand and his eyes found hers, a content smile on his face.

“Move in with me.” He whispered to her and she looked at him surprised.

“You want us to live together?” Emma asked a little befuddled.

He nodded. “I want the three of us to live together, Swan: you, me, Henry.” He smiled as he disentangled his hand from hers and reached to caress her face. “I don’t want to waste one more day without asking you to be with me.” He looked at her, a smirk coming to his face. “Besides, we barely spend a night apart unless you have a stakeout and even then you seem to break into my place in the middle of the night to share my bed.”

She blushed a little and averted her gaze but he held his hand in place and carefully directing her face to his, so she could see his blue eyes filled with love. “I love you, Emma. I want to live with you.  I can move to New York if you want, it’s all the same to me. As long as you are by my side, love; I don’t care where we live.” He tilted his head and gave her a hopeful smirk. “What do you say, Swan? Do you want to live with me?”

“ _Yes_.” She replied before leaning in to press a soft kiss to his lips and smiled at him when she broke the kiss.

“It’s been a long day… you should get some rest.”

“Aye… you should get some rest too. Are you going back to your place?” He asked, his hand caressing her face.

“I’m not leaving this room, Killian.” She said determined. “I’ll sleep on the chair…”

“Swan, that thing is preposterous.” He protested. “You won’t be able to rest properly in there.”

She gave him a stubborn look. “I. Am. Not. Leaving. Don’t think I am taking my eyes off you for a second!” She added playfully.

He smiled fondly at the memories before smirking smugly at her. “I would despair if you did.”

She leaned in to kiss him again and he held her close.

“Alright. If you insist on staying, come in the bed with me.” He said and he moved slowly to the side of the bed trying not to wince.

“Killian, you were shot, you’ve been in surgery, _you need to rest_.” Emma protested.

“So do you…” He said stubbornly before his eyes softened and he looked at her smiling. “Besides, I sleep better with you by my side, Swan.”

She knew he wasn’t going to change his mind, so she removed her shoes before carefully laying by his side, his head leaning on his shoulder, her hand holding his.

“Happy now?” She asked and felt him nod at her.

“Goodnight, love.” He said, his eyes already closing.

“Goodnight, Killian.” She whispered before drifting to sleep.


	33. The Truth

_Paint a picture of the days gone by_  
 _When love went blind and you would make me see_  
 _I'd stare a lifetime into your eyes_  
 _So that I knew that you were there for me_  
 _Time after time you were there for me_  
**I remember you, Skid Row**

  
Killian woke up the next morning with Emma by his side, his body sore but feeling more lighthearted than he’d ever felt in his life. She stirred next to him before opening her eyes and smiling softly at him. He pulled her closer to him, pressing a soft kiss in her temple. This is how it was going to be each day for the rest of his life. He sighed in contentment.

Emma agreed to leave the room only after Mac had arrived and between him and Killian they had convinced her to go get a quick shower and change of clothes. She agreed to run quickly to grab the stuff she had at his place as she refused to go all the way to New York. She kissed him deeply before leaving, not caring about the amused look on Mac’s face.

Killian looked marveled at her leaving before turning to Mac and giving him a sheepish grin. “I didn’t get to thank you yesterday for saving my life, mate.” He said, his voice thick with emotion.

“You would have done the same…” Mac said and Killian nodded. “I’m glad you got that pointy thing on your arm to save the day.” Mac tilted his head at Killian. “Care to explain how that exactly works, Detective?” He asked intently.

Killian scratched behind his ear, a self-deprecating smile in his face. “A tale for another day, perhaps.” He replied with chagrin and Mac nodded at him.

“I’m just glad to see you alive, mate. Nothing else matters, partner.” Mac said as he sat by his bed. “I noticed you changed your emergency contact.”

Killian sighed, “Aye. I did.”

“ _Good_.” Mad replied smiling. “It’s about time someone else took care of you. I was starting to get tired of having to do it all by myself.” He joked, his hand running through his hair.

“I’ve asked her to live with me.” Killian said smiling.

“Did she say yes?” Mac asked and Killian nodded, a goofy grin plastered in his face. Mac clasped his shoulder. “I’m happy for you, sunshine.”

 

When Emma returned, Maria was by Killian’s side, and he was listening intently as she fretted over him. The doctors had examined him and he’d be cleared late in the day, although he still needed to rest. Emma took one look at him before stating firmly.

“You are coming home with me.”

“Swan, I don’t want to create any inconveniences…” He started but she cut him off. “ _I was not asking you, Killian._ ”

Maria looked at Emma seriously and for a second Emma thought she was going to contest her decision, but then Maria looked at Killian and spoke firmly. “She is right. You cannot be alone in your apartment. Someone needs to take care of you.” She turned around to give Emma a warm smile. “You take him with you, dear. I’ll be sending food with Vinnie for you…” Emma already knew better than to even object to that idea. Maria got up from her seat and pressed a kiss to Killian’s forehead before leaving.

Emma sat on the bed and leaned in to kiss Killian softly. “I called Henry to tell him the news.” She said.

“And?” Killian asked nervously.

“He’s happy. He’s _very_ happy about it.” Emma reassured him. “He told me I should consider coming to Jersey.”

“Your life is in New York, Swan. I don’t pretend you’re going to change that…” He said. “I can accommodate.”

“It’s a long commute to do each day, Killian.”

“Aye, but it’s worth it.” He said.

“Let’s think about it… we don’t have to decide right now.” She said.

 

Emma took a few days off so she could be with Killian in his initial recovery. But at some point, he urged her to go back to her work, as he was feeling better and he could actually manage on his own. He even suggested he should go back to his own place only to be met with a stern look that made him shut his mouth and follow orders. He had been given an extended leave of absence at work (he figured Maria had made a phone call to the commissioner for that one), so he literally had nothing to do for the first time in three centuries. It was driving him insane in a certain way but he also knew that Emma felt better if he was safely secured in her place, so he didn’t contested. _Yet_.

Per his doctor’s orders, he started to take some short walks around the neighborhood and Henry frequently joined him. It was during one of those walks that Killian brought up the subject.

“Lad, I take it that your mother talked to you about our intentions to share a household?” He said, his nervousness bringing his old self stronger than usual.

Henry chuckled, “Yes, she told me you asked her to live with you.” He turned around to give him a smirk. “And I am ok with that.”

“I know your life is here, lad. So I would probably be moving to this place.”

“Killian…” Henry stated. “That doesn’t make any sense. I’ll only be with you a few days a week, as I spend half of my time at Regina’s. And I’ll be out of High School and moving into college in two years. It doesn’t make sense for you to commute _each day_ to Jersey.”

“I don’t have a problem with that, Henry.” Killian said.

“I know you don’t; but it’s not just that.” Henry looked at him. “My mom, I think she’d be happier there. She really likes hanging at the bakery with Laura, or going sailing with you. I know she’d never mention it to me….” Henry trailed off. “But she’s happier there, Killian. And- and I think I’d be happy there too.”

Killian smiled. “If it’s what your mother and you want, I’d love to have you there.” He said before he reached to clasp Henry’s shoulder.

“I’ll tell her.” Henry said.

 

Emma arrived later that day after dropping Henry at Regina’s. She found Killian resting on the couch with Vinnie, both engaged in a sport discussion. Vinnie and Killian got up the moment he saw her and Vinnie clasped Killian’s shoulder.

“I’ll leave you now in better company, Killian.” He said after winking at Emma.

“You’re using that as an excuse to escape because I was wining our argument.” Killian grinned at him, a mischievous smile on his face.

“Are you sure you want to live with him, sweetheart?” Vinnie teased.

“ _Very much_.” Emma replied as she leaned her head into Killian’s shoulder, her arms at his waist and he leaned in to press a kiss to her hair.

Vinnie smiled at them as he headed to the door, “Mike said that if you are feeling better, you should drop by the pizza place this weekend. His treat.”

“We’ll think about it.” Killian said and he leaned closer to Emma. “Thanks for dropping by, Vinnie.”

“Have a nice evening, guys!” Vinnie called as he left the apartment.

Emma turned around to give him a soft kiss. “Henry and I talked.” She said as she pulled him closer to her, her hands caressing his back.

“And?” He asked.

“And I think he’s right. We should live in Jersey.” She smiled at him and he bent down to capture her lips in a kiss. Her hands traveled over his body and she reached his wound. Her smile faded as she remembered how close she had come to losing him.

“Are you alright, love?” He asked pulling away from her, sensing her mood change. She tried to smile at him, but he could read in her eyes her fear and distress.

“Swan…” He asked hesitantly and she looked at him as she sat on the couch and motioned him to sit next to her.

“I almost lost you, Killian.” Emma said. “It’s just hard for me, that’s all…” She trailed off, her eyes dwelling.

“Emma…” He said as he cradled her face in his hand, his eyes looking at her earnestly. “If it’s too much, if you think that…” He stumbled to find the words before starting again. “I can always resign. Find something else to do.”

“Do you want to do that?” She asked and she could read in his eyes how much it would pain him to give his career up.

“No, but I’d do it for you.” He said sincerely.

She reached for his hand still in her cheek, softly caressing it. “You don’t have to make any more sacrifices for me.” She smiled. “I love you. I choose you. All of you. I support you on this, Killian. This is the life you want to live, and I want to live it with you.” She pressed her lips softly to his, and rested her forehead against his. “Just promise me that you’ll be careful. That you and Mac will work a better system. That you’ll use that hook every single time it gets too dangerous.”

“I promise.” He said.

“Promise me, Killian, that if needed, you’ll fight dirty to come back to me. To _us_.” She said.

“I promise you, Swan.” He vowed. “You’re my family, Swan. You and Henry.”

She pulled away from him, so her eyes could meet his, a nervous smile on her face, “It’s not just that, Killian. I – I’m _late_.”

 

Two minutes. _Two more minutes_. Emma thought as she stood on her bathroom, Killian’s arms embracing her from behind, her back against his chest as he held her tightly. She wasn’t expecting this to happen; they had been using protection. She hadn’t thought that far into their relationship yet as she was enjoying just being happy with Killian after everything they’d been through. And now, she couldn’t stop her mind for playing with little scenarios in her head: a baby, a small baby with his blue eyes, her arms cuddling a little baby, Killian, David and Henry assembling a crib, her mother knitting another baby blanket. Killian standing, a small baby snuggled against his chest and shoulder, softly rocking the baby to sleep. Her heart swelled at the thoughts and she reached for the test with shaking hands.

_One line._

Her heart sank for a second. She turned around to look at Killian, “Negative.” She said.

His eyes flickered with sadness for brief second before he masked it and gave a small smile.

“You wanted it.” She said softly to him. They haven’t talked about it but she could read it in his eyes.

“Aye.” He admitted softly. “I didn’t know how much I desired this until this moment, Swan.” He scratched behind his ear. “But we haven’t talked about it and it’s probably too soon, so I understand, love.” He finished, a soft understanding smile on his face.

She leaned into him, her green eyes lightning at him. “I want this, too.” She said and he looked at her confused. “I didn’t realize it until this happened either, but I want us to do this. _Together_.”

He gave her a big smile before reaching to kiss her… “I love you.” He said as he broke the kiss. “You make me happy, Emma. Happier each day.” He said.

“Killian, I don’t want you to get your hopes high. These things can take time and I – I.---” Emma trailed off, apprehension invading her but her held her tight and gave her a reassuring smile.

“We’ll try as much as needed, love.” He said with a mischievous smile.

“Really?” She asked smirking.

“In fact, I think we should start _now_.” He said before leaning in to kiss her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am heading out of town for a couple of weeks.. updates might be scarce or non existant... but I think this is a good place for you to wait, right?


	34. The House

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!!!

_Why be alone when we can be together baby_   
_You can make my life worthwhile_   
_And I can make you start to smile  
_ **To be with you, Mr Big**

They laid on her bed, her head resting on his chest as she traced patterns against his skin.

“We are going to need a bigger place, love.” Killian said as his hand played with her hair.

“Probably.” She said. “But we don’t have to do everything right away. We can move into your place and then figure it out.”

“I like the idea of finding a place for us,” He said. “Something we both move into and it becomes ours instead of just mine or yours… you know?”

“Yeah… but the market is tricky. I’d probably have to sell this place and we need to apply for a mortgage and…” Killian cut her off by pulling her closer to him and kissing her softly.

“Don’t worry about it, love.” He said softly. “I have enough money for a down payment. We can rent the apartments and use that to pay the mortgage.” He met her dumbfounded look. “ _What_?”

“So many things… do you want me to list them for you?” She said.

“Enlighten me, Swan.” He teased.

“One, it’s still weird to hear _Captain Hook_ talking about mortgages.” She held one finger to him and he playfully motioned to bite it. She quickly removed it and held a second finger. “Two, you want to keep the apartments?”

“They are a good investment.” He replied. “We _should_ keep them. It would be nice to give your place to Henry when he’s older.” He offered. “It’s not like we need the money.”

“Which brings me to three,” She said, looking directly into his eyes. “How much money did you get out of Regina?”

He chuckled and puller her tighter to him. “I am a _pirate_ , Swan. I know how to make a good deal.” He teased her and she scoffed at him. “Regina was very generous, that is true. But I’ve also made some good investments here and there…” He noticed her incredulous stare and cocked an eyebrow at her. “Vinnie is more than just a pretty face, you know. He has a school degree in finance, but he decided to work on the flower shop.” He finished looking at her with a sincere smile. “What do you say, Swan? Should we look around for a house?”

“We should.” She replied before kissing him.

 

_K: Can you and Henry meet me at this address?_

Emma checked the address on his text as she drove around the neighborhood. It wasn’t far from where his apartment was located, but it was closer to the marina and where he kept his boat. There were little brick houses with front and backyards on the side of the road.

She had a feeling when he had texted her and now she confirmed it. His black mustang was parked on one of the houses, which sported a “FOR SALE” sign. He was leaning against the hood of his car, a smile on his face as she and Henry got out of the car.

“Hello, love.” He said as he pressed a soft kiss to her lips before clasping Henry’s shoulder. “I wanted you to see this house, let me know what you think.” He took a key from his pocket and handed it to Emma.

The moment she opened the door, she knew it. The wooden floors, the open kitchen with a middle aisle, the fireplace in the living room area, a small little corner to place an armchair to read near the window overlooking the backyard.

She took a deep breath as Henry darted into the house and started checking the place. She turned around and she found Killian looking at her; his eyes mirroring her feelings.

“ _I know_ …” He whispered as he pulled her into his arms. “It has a master bedroom with a view of the sea, three more bedrooms, two bathrooms and a cozy little attic.” He smiled at her as he tucked a strand of her behind her ear. “And before you ask, _yes, we can afford it_.”

She looked at the empty space, as her mind started to picture a patchwork of their furniture combined in it.

“It seems _perfect_.”

“This is our home, Swan.” He replied, his eyes never leaving her. “ _Ours_ …”

“This is our happy ending?” She asked smirking.

He shook his head, “This isn’t where our story ends, love. This is where it begins.” He brushed his lips against hers, “I love you.”

“And I love you.” She replied. “Show me the rest.”


	35. The Vow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this chapter and I hope you love it too.

_If you're lost you can look - and you will find me_  
 _Time after time_  
 _If you fall I will catch you - I'll be waiting_  
 _Time after time_  
**Time after time, Cindy Lauper**

She couldn’t help the goofy grin on her face when she spotted him standing by that bench, a smirk on his face and handcuffs hanging from his hand.

“Care to relive some memories, love?” He asked as she reached him, his lips capturing hers softly in kiss.

“Do you want me to handcuff you to that bench? Like I did almost four years ago?” She asked confused and he shook his head at her.

“Not really, Swan.” He said as he sat on the bench and pulled her to sit next to him, his left arm snaking around her waist so she would lean into his side. “I thought it would be a good place for us to have this conversation.”

“We are having a conversation then?”

“Indeed we are.” Killian said as he looked into her green eyes, a soft smile in his face.  He seemed to struggle to find his words, a small pang of fear creeping into his eyes. Her hand reached for his face instantly, anchoring him to her, trying to infuse security into him.

“Hey.” She whispered. “Whatever is troubling you, you can tell me.” She said. “We can face it. _Together_.”

He rested his forehead against her, closing his eyes for a second and breathing in deeply before opening them again and looking at her. “ _Marry me_.” He whispered, his voice thick with emotion.

She froze at his words, her head spinning as she looked into his eyes. His arm kept his hold on her waist, and it was his turn to anchor her to him, his hand reaching to cradle her face. “Don’t panic.” He pleaded.

“I’m not panicking.” She said. “You just took me by surprise.” She admitted honestly.

“Aye. I imagine.” He said, his eyes boring into hers, as he moved his hand to play with her hair. “When I woke up at the hospital and I saw you there, my first thought was that I didn’t want to spend another day apart from you. I didn’t want to wait until we set out a date, planned a ceremony, all of that. I don’t need any of it to know that you and I are forever. That I’ll love you and cherish you for as long as I shall live.” He took a deep breath. “So I asked you to move in with me because that is all I needed…”

“That is all I need to, Killian.”

“Aye, but things have changed.” He said, “We are buying a house…”

“We’re planning to start a family.” She said and he put a finger on her lips.

“We are planning to _expand_ our family,” He corrected and her breath caught in her throat because even after everything they’d been through, hearing him embrace Henry so fervently as part of their lives makes her heart swell. “And with all that, Swan, I – it got me thinking. Perhaps we should – I mean, when they find out…” He trailed off nervous and she smirked at him.

“Are you afraid my dad will come looking for you with his sword?” She asked teasingly.

“Your father is hardly a threat compared with what Maria would do to me if I get you pregnant out of wedlock.” Killian stated seriously.

“So, is it _your_ family we are afraid of?”

“You are my family, Swan.” He whispered to her. “You and Henry.”

“You know what I mean…”

“Aye, I do.” He said smiling. He looked at her, a hopeful smile in his eyes. “And even without all that… I want this, Emma. I want to be called yours in front of the world. I want to carry a token of us, a promise of always belonging to each other, as needless as it might be. I know we don’t need it… but I kind of want it.” He admitted shrugging, his hand scratching behind his ear in that nervous tick that she loved in him. Once upon a time she had relished the fact that she could make _Captain Hook_ nervous. She’d carried that as a battle trophy, the hero making the villain nervous, a simple lost girl besting the most ruthless pirate to ever sail the seas. And then he became Hook, and then Killian, and the he became _hers_. And she became _his_. It hadn’t been easy, it hadn’t been a smooth journey, but they’d made it through. And in front of her was the man that she loved looking at her with his hopeful eyes and his trademark smile. “What do you say, Swan? I know I should have planned this much better and you usually get this type of proposals from flying monkeys,” He joked before turning to her in a serious tone “but… would you marry me? Soon?”

She smiled as she leaned into him, her nose nuzzling his, “Yes, I’ll marry tomorrow if necessary.”

“I think that can be arranged.” He smirked as he bent down to kiss her. “I do have something for you, though.” He smiled, a happy look in his eyes as he reached for his pocket. “I might have been less than traditional in asking, and they might also be less than traditional, but I got us these.”

He handed her a ring box, slightly larger than the usual one. When she opened it, she could see two rings in there: thick silver bands, both engraved in darker grey.  The larger one had swans on it, the smaller one hooks. Her eyes blurred with tears as she looked up to him, “These are perfect.” She whispered.  

He smiled at her as he reached for the smaller ring. “I love you, Swan, and I wish to spend the remainder of my days by your side.” He said as he carefully slid the ring on her finger, before taking her hands to his lips and placing a soft kiss on top of it. “This I vow to you. And I will gladly do it again in front of our families and friends.”

She looked at the ring still in the box and he smiled sheepishly at her. “Unfortunately, I only have my right hand to give…” She put a finger to his lips to silence him, as she removed the ring from the box and reached for his hand. “I love you, Killian, and I don’t care if you wear this on your right hand or hanging on your necklace if you prefer it.” She slid the ring on his finger, and it stayed there, his hand now sporting two rings: Liam’s ring on his middle finger and this one on his ring finger   All I care about is spending the rest of my life with you.” She looked up at him, a bright smile on her face. “This I vow to you.” She said before leaning in and capturing his lips in a soft, tender kiss, sealing their promise.

He rested his forehead against hers. “Do we have to do this again?” She asked.

“Only if you want to, love.” He said, playing with a strand of her hair and tucking it behind her ear.

“Something small.” She said. “On our backyard… just friends and family.”

“Sounds perfect.” He said before leaning in and kissing her again.  


	36. The Captain

_In my life there's been heartache and pain_  
 _I don't know if I can face it again_  
 _Can't stop now, I've traveled so far_  
 _To change this lonely life_  
**I want to know what love is, Foreigner**

“Good morning, Lieutenant.” Killian heard the greeting from the officer on the front desk and smiled at her.

“Good morning, Mel.” He nodded his head at her.

“Have a good day, _Lieutenant_.” She gave him an intriguing smile as he headed to the back of the station and he narrowed his eyes.

“Lieutenant Jones.” Another office greeted him.

_And another_. “Lieutenant.”

“Good to see you, Lieutenant.” _Another_.

He was suspicious by the time he reached the back room and found Mac leaning on his desk, flashing him a warm smile.

“Glad you could join us this lovely morning, Lieutenant Jones.”

“Mac, what the bloody hell is going on, mate?”

“We’re all very happy to see you today, Lieutenant.” Mac smirked at him, reaching to clasp Killian’s shoulder. “And…” He stretched the word, raising his eyebrows at Killian. “The big bosses want to see you upstairs.”

“So what of it? I’ve been called before. They are probably going to assign me a new case.” Killian said, his eyes narrowing down again in confusion.

“Then I’d suggest you get going, _Lieutenant_.”

“What is it with all of you and my rank today?” Killian sighed in annoyance.

“Well, let’s put his way, mate. We’re all taking our chance to call you _Lieutenant_ for the last time.” Mac smiled broadly at him, “ _Now go_.”

 

Killian came back from his meeting and entered the room, a satisfied smile on his face. He lifted his head and saw most of the members of the station in there, a banner hanging on the room. _Congratulations Captain._ Mac was the first to reach out to him, enveloping in a tight hug.

“Congratulations, Killian.” He spoke sincerely, the words broken by the emotion in his voice.

“Thank you, mate.” Killian replied patting Mac’s back. He pulled away after a moment, because his eyes had spotted her in the back of the room, a bright smile on her face; looking at him with pride in her eyes.

_The one person he most desperately wanted to share this with._

He was by her side in an instant and she jumped into his arms, both of them giggling. She pulled away and her eyes were shining brightly at him.

“Congratulation, _Captain_ _Jones._ ” She whispered before kissing him.

They celebrated with coffee and cannoli, and Killian never let go of Emma’s hand as he received the congratulations of his fellow officers.

“I’m glad you are here, Swan.” He leaned in to whisper in her ear.

“Mac called me earlier this morning and I knew I had to make it.” She replied before leaning into him. “And I have something for you, _Captain_.”

He cocked an eyebrow at her. “Let me show you my new office, love.” He tilted his head and bit his lower lip as she hit him playfully on the shoulder before heading to the office. He followed her, ignoring the whistles from his squad and the interesting look Mac was giving him.

He made sure to close the door before turning around to face her. “I got you something…” She said nervously as she reached for her bag and retrieved a small glass square that resembled a photo frame. She handed it to him smiling shyly. He took it and his heart skipped a beat once he looked at it in detail. The cut and worn leather square that held Liam’s insignia was in the middle of the frame. His eyes welled with tears.

“I found it on your old satchel…” She said softly as she looked at him. “He’d be proud of you, Killian.”

“This – this is perfect, love.” He carefully placed the frame on his desk before leaning in to capture her lips with his. Slowly but passionately, his hand rested on her head as he pulled her closer to him, tilting his head and deepening the kiss eagerly.

_Gods, he loved her even more each day._

He whispered against her lips when he broke the kiss, “Remember when we found each other again?”

“You mean the day you handcuffed me to the cell?” Her tone was playful as she looked at him cocking an eyebrow.

He moved closer to her until she was resting against his desk. “That was not what I _really_ wanted to do, Swan.” He said as his eyebrows rose, his head tilting and his tongue darting over his bottom lip.

“No? And what you wanted to do… _Captain_?”

“ _This_ …” He admitted before his hands reached for her hips and he pressed against her, kissing her senseless as he’d wanted to do that day.

“We should stop, Killian.” She gasped when she felt herself almost on the verge of losing control.

“Should we?” He asked playfully. “Isn’t this the point of having my own office? I could take you, right here, right now, Swan.” He murmured against her skin and she had to suppress a moan.

“That would be _bad form_.”

“They’ve already made me Captain. Who cares?”

“What if they demote you?”

“It still would be worth it…” He finished before capturing her lips in a searing kiss.

He pulled away eventually, giving them both a minute to catch their breath before tugging a lock of her hair behind her ear. “I love you.” He said, his eyes boring into hers.

She smiled as she caressed his cheek. “I love you too. And now I need to get out of here…” She said as she quickly made her way towards the door before he decided he _actually_ wanted to finish what he’d started.

“Don’t leave…” He begged as he went after her. She opened the door and stepped out before turning around and giving him a stern look.

“You have work, Captain. And _I_ have a wedding to plan, because _someone_ decided we should be all legal and traditional about it.” She pointed her finger at him and he smirked at her.

“Please, Swan, like they are letting us decide on anything…” He replied before Mac chuckled at the both of them from his desk.

“Oh yes, _the wedding_. They are all so excited about it… they’ve been planning the cooking for days. And _they will be cooking for days_.” He sighed.  “I swear, if I have to hear one more word about your wedding cake decoration, I am going to request a transfer to South Dakota.”

Killian and Emma gave Mac a sheepish smile. His words were not an exaggeration. The moment they announced their intention to get married in a _simple ceremony_ , both families have jumped in excitement at the possibility of planning it. Laura’s family took over the food and Vinnie invited Mary Margaret to help him with the flowers and overall decorations for the party. In the span of fifteen minutes, Killian and Emma watched how all tasks were distributed and they were left with nothing to do for themselves, other than keep battling for the concept of _simple_.

Emma leaned in to whisper in Killian’s ear “Aren’t you glad we’ve already exchanged vows?” Her hand caressed the ring he kept wearing on his finger.

“ _Very glad_.” He replied before pressing a soft kiss to her lips. “See you at home, my love.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be one more chapter after this one... but the end is near.


	37. The Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, here it is. The end. The final chapter. There might be one or two epilogues eventually, but I’ve always envisioned this fic ending with this scene and this dialogue. To me, it’s where it needs to end. I want to thank Sandra, the rum allergy to my goat milk, for encouraging me over and over to write this and being there every step of the way, fighting charminators off this fic.  And my beloved beta, Jess, who has read and re read every bit of this and helped me make it better.  
> And to all of you for your reviews, comments and kind words. They have meant the world to me. See you in the next one, hopefully! (I am working on a new multichapter, but it will be a while until I post it. Be on the lookout!)

_When I'm feeling blue, all I have to do_  
 _Is take a look at you, then I'm not so blue_  
 _When I'm in your arms, nothing seems to matter_  
 _My whole world could shatter, I don't care_  
 _Wouldn't you agree, baby you and me got a groovy kind of love_  
**A Groovy Kind of Love, Phil Collins**

Killian paced around the backyard for what felt like the umpteenth time.

“Would you please calm down?” Henry sighed at him. “It’s not like she is going to run away, you know? And there is no curse that will take us this time.”

Killian sighed as he looked at Henry sheepishly… “I am three centuries old and I am fidgeting worse than a lad, aren’t I?”

Henry clasped Killian’s shoulder as he shrugged, “It will be ok. I’ll go see my mom now. _Stop_ pacing around.”

“Aye.” Killian watched Henry go as Vinnie came to him, a satisfied smile on his face.

“What do you think?” He asked proudly as he pointed at the tulip flower arrangements in yellow, red and orange.

“Looks great, mate. Thank you.”

“And for the final touch…” Vinnie said as he carefully secured an orange tulip bouttonniere on the lapel of Killian’s simple black suit. “ _Perfetto_.”

Vinnie stood next to Killian as they both turned around to assess the people gathering in the backyard. It was only a moment before Killian felt Vinnie’s hand on his shoulder as he muttered almost breathlessly.

_“_ Killian _, who_ is the redhead and please tell that she’s single…”

Killian looked in the direction of Vinnie’s eyes and he smirked briefly before turning around to talk to Vinnie.  

“Her name is Ruby. She is as _deadly_ as she looks, her grandmother can shoot a crossbow with deathly accuracy and I am not sure if she is available.” He noticed Vinnie’s disheartened stare and he quickly reassured him.  “But I’ll check.”

Killian made his way to where Mary Margaret was standing; putting together the final touches to the flower arrangements.

“Killian…” She smiled softly at him as she straightened the lapels of his jacket. “You look very handsome, if I may say so.”

“Thank you, Majesty.” Killian bowed his head at her. “I have a question for you… Is Ruby still seeing that wretched doctor?”

“No, they broke up… why?” Mary Margaret looked at him intrigued.

“You see...” Killian started. “It seems that Vinnie has noticed her.” He raised a hand towards Mary Margaret “Granted, I know that he has his reputation; I helped build it after all… but he is a good lad, milady.”

Mary Margaret beamed softly at him “I know he is. I’ve worked with him putting all this together. He is a sensitive soul, Killian…” She gave him a mischievous look.  “What are you suggesting we do about this?”

Killian bit his lower lip before reaching for Mary Margaret’s hand. “I’ll leave that in your capable hands. It’s your area of expertise, milady. And I’ll be somewhat occupied in a few moments marrying your daughter.” He finished before pressing a soft kiss to her hand and winking at her.

She rolled her eyes, remembering his mannerisms in the Enchanted Forest all those years ago. “ _Go_. I’ll take care of it.”

A few moments later, Ruby approached Mary Margaret and hugged her enthusiastically. “I can’t believe they are _finally_ getting married!” Ruby was almost jumping up and down with excitement. “Where should I sit? Is left the side of the bride?”

Mary Margaret waved her hand dismissively “Oh, we are not being _that_ traditional today; everyone can sit wherever they want. Let me find someone to help you.” She turned around and locked eyes on her prey.  “Vincent!” She called sweetly and Vinnie was by her side in an instant, a flashing smile on his face.

“Vincent, this is my dear friend Ruby,” Mary Margaret said as she beamed at the both of them. “Would you be so kind to escort her to a free seat? Thank you…” She finished with a satisfied smirk as Vinnie rushed to take Ruby’s arm and escorted her to a free seat, sitting next to her.

 

Killian was smiling at the sight of Vinnie leaning to whisper something to Ruby when he felt a clasp on his shoulder and turned to find Mac smirking at him.

“Your bride is ready. Are you sure you don’t want to reconsider _that_?” He pointed to Killian’s left arm.

Killian lifted his arm, smiling at his old brace and hook. “No. I was wearing this when she met me. I am going to wear it when I marry her.”

Mac nodded before standing next to Killian. “Let’s do this, sunshine.”

Time froze for Killian the moment he saw her walking down the aisle holding her father’s arm, a simple white gown and her hair in a semi bun, blonde locks cascading down her shoulders. Simple. Elegant. Fierce. _His Swan_.

They smiled at each other as she stood by his side and he briefly nodded at David before reaching for Emma’s hand. His voice shook at little as he pronounced his vows to her, his hand slowly sliding her ring one more time to her finger. Her eyes filled with tears as she pronounced her vows, her hand shaking a little as she slid his ring to his finger before holding his hand and hook and looking into his eyes with a bright smile.

And then he leaned in to kiss her softly, and it wasn’t the end. And it wasn’t the beginning. It was them, just them, choosing to be each other’s happy ending.

She leaned in to whisper in his ear as they walked down the aisle holding hands.

“Killian, can you explain to me how Vinnie ended up sitting next to Ruby?”

“Aye… that… well… he noticed her when she arrived and well…” He trailed off embarrassed.  

_“Did you set them up_?”

“Oh no, Swan, I would not dream to meddle in such affairs.” He replied in a serious tone before giving her a mischievous smile. “I asked your mother, love.”

She rolled her eyes at him before letting him pull her into another kiss.

 

They were slowly dancing on the middle of the dance floor, his arms snaking her waist and her arms on his neck, her head pressed against his chest and shoulder, his chin resting peacefully at the top of her head.

“You know what this means, right?” Emma asked as she lifted her head to meet his eyes.

“What?” He asked slowly.

“You are now a prince, Killian.” She smirked at him and he laughed lightly.

“I’ll never be truly a prince, Swan. Perhaps a _pirate prince_. Can you live with that, love?” He asked as his hand reached to caress her cheek, before slowly leaning in.

“I think I can…” She replied before meeting his lips.  


Mac was standing by the end of the dance floor, looking at Emma and Laura chatting by the dessert table, when Killian approached him, his old flask in his hand.

“Rum?” Killian asked and Mac smirked at him as he grabbed the flask and took it to his lips, drinking. He gave it back to Killian, who took a small sip before manipulating with his hook to put the cork back in and pocket it inside the jacket of his suit.

“Mac?” Killian asked as he followed Mac’s eyes to Emma and Laura.

“Yes?”

“Thank you, mate.” Killian said earnestly.

Mac turned around to look at him “I told you that you’d thank me one day.” He replied smirking. “You’re welcome. Now go dance with your wife, sunshine.”


	38. Epilogue: The Little Pirate

They found out on their honeymoon. After touring Rome for an entire week, hand in hand, with heated kisses and whispered love declarations; Killian rented a boat and sailed them towards Greece. It was then when she noticed that the movement of the boat made her sick, something that had never happened before. Emma mentally counted the days and, as much as she tried, couldn’t help the flicker of hope that lit within her.

Killian looked at her with concerned eyes when she came above deck, “Feeling better, love?” He asked softly, gently rubbing her lower back in a comforting gesture.

“Yeah,” She nodded nervously and he could sense there was something more.

“Emma?” He asked hesitantly.

Her green eyes met his with a mix of hope and apprehension. “I’m late…” She whispered.

_Two minutes_. Those were the two longest minutes of his life. He’d been alive centuries, years had gone by in the blink of an eye, decades almost forgotten in a blurred tangle of moments that he couldn’t pinpoint any longer. And yet, those two minutes felt like an eternity.

But suddenly Emma’s eyes were filled with tears of joy as she took the stick with shaky hands and he could see the two lines and his entire world changed forever.

_They were going to have a baby._

He embraced her, holding her tight to him as he smiled against her hair. “Well, it was fortunate that we wedded when we did, Swan.” He whispered.

He could feel her laughter reverberate all though his body. “Well, _technically_ , you still got me pregnant out of wedlock.” She replied as she pulled away slightly, her hands cradling his face. “But I don’t think they’d care.” She whispered against his lips.

“Neither do I.” He replied before kissing her.

Keeping the secret for the first months was hard. He had to constantly battle his excessive worry over every slightly strenuous movement Emma did and hid it from the rest. He wasn’t sure Mac hadn’t actually noticed; but if he had, he had kept it to himself. Emma wasn’t any better, her hands reaching for her stomach every time she sneezed and then looking around to see if anyone had noticed.

When they finally broke the news at the 12th week, it was to be met with absolute joy from everyone in the room before Laura, Mary Margaret and Maria started smothering Emma with food, tips and unsolicited advice. Which she took with incredibly grace and infinite patience, like the perfect princess she was meant to be in another life.

He never asked her to leave her job, as it wouldn’t have been fair to ask her to keep herself from risk when he wasn’t doing the same. They did, however, agreed to be more careful in their jobs and avoid as many situations as possible where they could be at unnecessary risk.

And he kept his promise, with one exception. Just one exception to finally close that chapter from his past that had haunted him for centuries. But it was done and dealt with and he was back at her side, ready for the next doctor’s appointment.

She was in the middle of the pregnancy when they found out it was a boy. And although they haven’t talked about it, she didn’t hesitate when the doctor asked them if they have chosen a name.

“ _Liam_ ” She whispered and she felt his hand squeezed hers and when she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze, she was almost blinded with how bright his love for her, for _them_ , was.

Emma drove everyone crazy until the nursery was the perfect shade of blue and the mobile for the cradle was the exact replica of the _Jolly Roger_. There wasn’t much from Killian’s former life, but his spyglass and the compass found a place in the nursery too. And when David claimed that it didn’t seem the nursery of a prince, Emma replied proudly, “It’s because it’s not. It’s the nursery of a _sailor_.” 

Liam came to them on a sunny afternoon, after some painful labor hours and a C-section to avoid further stress. When they put him in Killian’s arms, and he witnessed his son, a single tear run through his eyes. He leaned towards Emma so she could see him, “Welcome, Liam, we’ve been waiting for you, lad.” He whispered to his son before he pressed a kiss to Emma’s temple. “I love you.” He vowed against her hair.

The first weeks were a hazy memory of sleepless nights, diaper changes, late night feedings and blissful exhaustion. And they wouldn’t change it for anything in this or any other realm.

One night, Emma woke up to an empty bed and a silent house. Estranged, she got of bed and slowly padded towards Liam’s nursery. She stopped at the doorframe, her breath caught in her throat at the image in front of her.

Killian was standing by the window, blue flannel pajama pants and a white shirt, barefoot. He was holding Liam, his left forearm supporting Liam’s butt while his song curled against his chest and shoulder. Killian’s right hand was softly caressing Liam’s back, as he gently swayed back and forth, softly humming a tune while his son slept peacefully against his chest.

Emma smiled softly before slowly reaching them and pressing a kiss to Killian’s shoulder blade. He smiled back at her, leaning to brush his lips against hers. 


	39. The Pirate Princess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> unbeated--- please excuse mistakes

_Penelope_ .

Penelope was his undoing. Killian had always thought that Emma was his weakness, only to learn that Liam and Henry’s combined manipulation skills that could best even a three hundred year old pirate like himself.

But Penelope, she was something else.

She was everyone’s undoing. Penelope came to this world with dark hair like her father and green eyes like her mother.  As years went by, her resemblance to her grandmother was even more striking and Killian had started to refer to her as the fairest of them all when he was carefully placing her in bed at night.

Penelope had a special way with people, that much both Emma and Killian knew; and it had been difficult for them to prevent their daughter to be spoiled by their friends and family. But it was only when Penelope had broken one of Regina’s favorite china and the only thing that happened was Regina cocking an eyebrow and saying, “don’t do it again, dear” while handing an apple to the little girl that was almost a replica of the ten-year old girl she’d sworn to destroy once; that Killian and Emma truly realized the extent of Penelope’s charming genes. 

A trip to Storybrooke proved them right when Penelope enchanted all her toys to have a tea party. Emma and Regina had to track down two teddy bears all the way into the woods, while Killian retrieved a tiny crocodile from the docks, cursing silently at the irony.

Fourteen year old Penelope proved to be a challenge. With a wardrobe picked by her godmother Ruby and paid willingly by his godfather Vinnie, Penelope truly was the fairest of them all. But she had her parent’s disposition to always be a little of an outsider and definitely for getting into trouble. Nothing major, other than that time she and Liam took _The Beanstalk_ out and almost wreck it.

At fifteen, Penelope developed her first crush in no other than Roland Hood, who’d had a least a decade on her. While Killian sighed and ran his hand through his hair, Emma laughed at it.

“You’re centuries older than me, Killian.” She said.

“That is _different_ , Swan and you know it.” He retorted.

Emma laughed as she hugged him, her lips pressing softly to his, “It’s just a crush, she’ll get over it.”

But she never did. For Penelope, Roland was her true love. As unrequited as it will always be.

Penelope surprised no one when she decided to follow her father’s footsteps and becoming a police officer. But after graduating with honors and a couple of years working in Jersey, she decided she needed to get out of the place where her last name would be seen as the reason she got everything and moved to the place where her mother’s name would be the reason she got the job, but she could still make it hers.

And thus Penelope packed her mother’s old yellow bug (that she had improved with magic) and moved to Storybrooke to become the first Sheriff/Savior after her mother had left more than twenty-five years ago.

Most sheriffs in Storybrooke have not had magic, but it was a welcomed addition for the person occupying the position. Hardly anything happened these days, as many of the citizens had magic of their own (several true love couples have stayed and raised their kids there) and old feuds had been left behind.

Penelope found herself at home and at ease in Storybrooke. She quickly befriended several of her peers: Cinderella and Aurora’s youngest daughters became her new friends and the three of them would be spotted having drinks and shooting pool at The Rabbit Hole.

But her truest friend in Storybrooke was Tiberius.  

She met him on her first day back, as she took a walk on the docks and ran into one of the young men that worked there. She hadn’t seen him in more than fifteen years, but the son of Ariel and Eric still had eyes the color of the sea and dark hair, the high cheekbones now covered by a slight gingerbread scruff. He might be the grandson of a god, and the son of a prince, but Tiberius loved to lead a simple life.

_So you’re back into town? They said they’d bring someone new for the Sheriff position but I didn’t know it was you. Welcome back, Penny Jones._

_Don’t call me Penny, Tiberius. And that knot is wrong._

_I’m the grandson of Triton, are you seriously correcting my knots, **Jones**?_

_I’m the daughter of the Scourge of the Seven Seas and he can tie better knots than your grandpa with **one hand**. Do you want me to turn you into a toad?_

_I have magic too, remember?_

While Penelope’s magic was wild and tempestuous like a storm at sea, Tiberius’ magic was calm as the soft breeze over the ocean on a spring afternoon. And its combination was a force to be reckoned with. Tiberius made a habit out of hanging out in the sheriff station with Penelope when he wasn’t working at the docks, bringing her hot chocolate with cinnamon and grilled cheese – _but really, Jones, has no  one ever told you that you need to eat some vegetables too? Let me at least bring you some salad once in a while._

More than once, he’d gone with her to help her with a case - _since you are lurking here, might as well come with me and become useful. No, Tiberius I am not giving you a gun, use your magic._

Eventually, she started teasing him that she should make it official and make him a deputy once and for all. Tiberius would smile shyly and deflect her comments, telling her she could always repay him the favor by going sailing with him.

Penelope loved sailing, and she used to commandeer his sailboat every time they went out, showing him how he should be doing. Tiberius would just smile again, letting her do whatever she wanted. And when the breeze would get a little chilly, he would take out his peacoat and give to her, because – _clearly Jones, hasn’t your father taught you that red leather jackets are not proper clothes for sailing_ – and – _shut up, Tiberius or I’ll turn you into a toad and you’ll have to wait for your true love to come kiss you_.

And if Penelope felt something different as she burrowed herself in his navy peacoat, both of them watching the sunset, she’d never said it out loud.

Because it was nothing, really. He was a good friend and nothing more. She knew what love was, and love was what she felt for Roland, even though she knew he’d never see her in the same way.

Tiberius was a friend. _A Good Friend_.

Until one day some stupid villain showed up hell-bent on revenge on a town that had not seen a revenge-driven attack since Zelena and in the midst of the fight, Penelope came to realize she’d overestimated the villain’s powers. She tried to prepare for a strike that never came, as she witnessed in horror how Tiberius jumped to protect her, taking the hit of the curse with him.

Strong magic as she never seen in herself before blasted from her hands and the villain was soon vanquished. Penelope threw herself into the floor, right where Tiberius was lying motionless.

_No_.

_No. It couldn’t be._

That was when realization hit her. That what she thought was love, wasn’t. It was just a child infatuation she’d hold onto to avoid getting her heart broken.

But now her heart was breaking, because _this_ , this might as well have been _love_. The lazy Sunday afternoons sailing, the quiet times at the station sharing a grilled cheese, the pool games and beers at The Rabbit Hole, the late night lasagna binging at Granny’s and every single time he’d walked her to her door, only to give her a longing look as he ran a hand through his hair and wished her a goodnight.

Her hand reached to caress his cheek as she leaned in, tears in her eyes and a plea in her heart, “Come back to me, Tiberius.” She whispered as her lips brushed his.

And then she felt the magic wave ripple through them, light and warm enveloping them both. It was a familiar sense, she’d heard her grandparents and her own parents describe it and she knew that it felt different for each one. For her grandparents, it had felt like a sunny morning at the edge of a lake, the smell of forest and homemade food. For her parents, it had been like the quiet after the storm at sea, the sense of a turmoil finally ending and the taste of hot chocolate and rum.

For her, it was grilled cheese and beers and the chilled breeze felt when overlooking the sunset at sea.

She felt his breath intake and she pulled away to meet his sea color eyes looking at her tenderly. He slowly pulled himself into a sitting position and reached out to brush a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “What? Did someone turn me into toad that you had to kiss me?” He smirked smugly.

She shoved him playfully between tears and laughs, “Shut up, you idiot. Don’t you ever do that again.”

Tiberius pulled her close to him, his eyes boring into hers, “I will do that again if your life is in danger, Jones. Don’t you know it by now, Penny?” He sighed, resting his forehead against hers, “ _I love you_.”

She nuzzled her nose with his, “ _I love you too_.”

He closed the distance between them and kissed her.

/-/

(“David is ecstatic because he’s the grandson of a god and the son of a prince.”

“You father can be so obtuse, Swan. Tiberius is, first and foremost, a sailor. A man of the sea.”

“You seem very chipper for a guy that just found out his only daughter has found _true_ _love_. I honestly thought you were going to drive there and threaten him with your hook.”

“Swan, you wound me. Besides, love, who do you think the lad has asked for advice to? Do you think the _sea god_ or the _prince_ know anything about how to break down a savior’s walls?”

“You _knew_.”

“Aye, I figured it out last time we were there visiting. I’m quite perceptive, Emma.”

“You’ve conspired to trick your own daughter!”

“Pirate, love. And there was no tricking. You can’t trick true love, Swan.”)


End file.
